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How to deal with the dragon lady boss

Updated on September 19, 2011

You are probably the dragon's opposite...

Everyone has at one time or another come across a boss who made life a really hot place deep in the bowels of the earth. Yet some of these people never realized to play fire with fire, or better yet fire and ice.

See my previous boss was my exact opposite, which in the corporate world would make the perfect sales team. Big corporations don't exactly think about the mental states of their employees sadly enough... Here is why. I am the calm and collected employee that is relationship based in sales, so I build the big sales but not as many. She on the other hand is loud, unorganized and bounces between people pulling multiple but low priced sales. This can cause a problem with customer service and store organization. Here is how to deal:

If your boss consistantly calls to tell you how badly the store is doing on your only day off; say this: (Insert name here) we can't control certain issues within the company but we can control what we do about it and complaining about what we did wrong rather than finding solutions will not solve anything.

If your boss likes to tear you down to bring her up: Show her why your a good asset by frankly, beating her in sales until the point that she asks YOU what you do to make the numbers happen. ( Just remember not to let the power go to your head, this leads to drama..) Get excited and be happy that for once you have won, celebrate afterwards even but always remember to not boast your achievements. Why? Well she will just start tearing you down sooner than expected... So make it competitive, but a healthy competition!

If your boss likes to ask you how you would do things and then does them but takes all the credit when the big boss visits: Hopefully you notice that you are not getting any credit, and if you do STOP letting her know what YOU would do... Make the changes happen, and then if she asks why you did them, then explain why but make sure to inform HER boss. So you finally get credit. This can lead to promotions! :)

If she is the type of boss that likes to play more bad cop than good cop: BE THE GOOD COP, and use it to your advantage. Employees react differently to bosses who aim for blood versus the ones aiming to make the job better for everyone. I say this because as humans, and as women we like for people to look up to us and depend on us. So if we can WOMAN UP and be the better person by finding the middle ground between leader and friend. We can build armies and strong bonds.

If at the end of the day, you want to punch a clown because of how negative your boss is: Go home, change into something cool and comfortable, take a jog( even if its short because exercising releases endorphines to make us happy again!), buy a punching bag, paint a clown on the punching bag ( if the nose honks even better), take a nice long hot bath, start a journal and write out your feelings since most people do not care to hear whining, eat ice cream or drink something like hot tea or coffee. I say write it out because people have a tendancy to bottle things up to a point where we want to hate everything about our jobs.. In this economy we cannot afford such things, so relax, let it out. If you have to, burn the stuff that is written if it makes it better. Just release that stress before it consumes every aspect of the being.

Remember the natural 5 senses

With having the dragon lady boss, we must remember how to release the anger that does build up. Especially if we are the quiet types, and even if we are the outspoken types, we would rather not get fired for saying what is REALLY on the mind. So, here is how to remember to keep the mouth shut and to survive the bosses.. Remember simply the five senses:

1) Eyes: If your boss is scolding you, focus on an object directly behind them, look around their heads. This way, they cannot say that you are not paying attention.

2) Ears: This one is easy, IN ONE AND OUT THE OTHER, like teenagers...Another special trick that those magicians have failed to inform us is, sync certain words into the short- term memory. This way they again cannot say that you are not paying attention. Like if they ask what did I just say? Remember code words like, "attitude" and "conduct". Those words are easy to figure out what the rest of the sentence was. Not all bosses expect verbatim and if yours does.. Im sorry!!! Maybe you will then need a note pad?

3) Nose: Remember to breathe, if you do this and do this calmly, we can lower the heart rate so that more blood flows to the brain..This way we do not have word vomit and make remarks that we as the employees will regret. :)

4) Mouth: If you follow step 3, correctly then it will be full proof that you will be able to KEEP YOUR MOUTH CLOSED. Unless you agree profusely... Then talking is alright, as long as it stays calm and professional.

5) Touch: Usually when I am mad at my boss, I want to ball up a fist and the rest is understood :) This though cannot happen. So my advice to control this urge is to touch your thumb to each finger and rotate as if counting with your fingers. This keeps your hand busy, and helps release some tension. Like a good stretch, but for a fist :)

Use this advice and mold it to work for you!

Once again, we all have had or will have the job that we dread because it lies deep in the mouth of a dragon but we can manage and adapt to survive in such environments. We must remember to breathe and to accept the reality of the job or change it. Figure out a professional style that works for you, or better yet take my advice! Learning how to calmly deal with these types of bosses will help mold the person who you are meant to be. So with this advice, let us mold into some rock hard concrete, avoid showing weakness and win the battle by using ice (stay chill). The calmer we are, the more freaked out the boss will become and that is more glorious than quitting! Good luck to everyone and message me on how it worked for you!


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    • prektjr.dc profile image

      Debbie Carey 

      7 years ago from Riverton, KS, USA

      Very good! I just left the job with the Dragon Ladies Bosses! Yes....2 of them!! I wish I had read your hub months ago!! It is hilarious and very on track! Voted up, useful, funny AND interesting!

    • Kschmidt profile imageAUTHOR


      7 years ago from Texas

      Thanks! Just trying to give some advice while throwing in some laughter.


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