ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

How to get the sexy gifts you want for Christmas

Updated on November 14, 2009

 You've got  a litlle more than two and a half months left now, before it's Christmas. If you don’t want to find a box of chocolates or the book HTML for Dummies underneath the Christmas tree, than know how to act like a pro and give hints to get the sexy presents that you want.

We all know that we need to be grateful with what we get from Santa, but sometimes it’s hard to disguise you disappointments if you get another pair of Christmas Socks, even though you didn’t wore the pair you've gotten last year yet. And that CD from Paul Potts can be nice, but it’s hardly to compare this with a Magic Massager isn’t it?

If you’re desperately want a sex toy but don’t know how to ask for it, than learn to be open about and give clues about your needs, so that you (without having to buy it yourself) get the best dildo you want. But it’s important to hand out the right clues because there is the difference with getting a Rabbit vibrator and getting an action figure of Jessica from who framed Roger Rabbit…


Men are from Mars


We all know the differences between men and women when it comes to buying presents. But the differences are even larger when it comes to giving clues about what we want (without saying it straight forward). Women are professionals in that, while men don’t get that concept at all. But that doesn’t mean that women don’t have to worry.

You might think that your clue will get you that “I Rub My Duckie” but if you’re too subtle, the only thing that you will see float in the bath tub, are the pubic hairs from your man.

To cut a long story short.. Ladies, if you want him to understand the clues and do something with those clues, you just be more specific. Don’t confuse him by giving him more possibilities. Stick to what you want, eventually he will get it.

To you men, you don’t have to be subtle. If you want a toy, just say you want that Prostate massager to find out if it really gives you that orgasm you only can dream of(in combination with some handy- or mouth work from her of course)

She’ll get that clue.

5 tips to get the naughty goodies:

1.Talk about it in bed.

Just share your fantasies together. This is the time to give some clues and pay attention to what your partner tells you, there might be some clues in there too about what toys or goodies are wanted.

2.Go shopping together

Wait a minute girls… This doesn’t mean that you have to drag him to every clothing shop in the area.

Hoo boys, this isn’t your ticket to take her with you to every gadget store.

While you’re buying Christmas gifts for friends and family, you’ve got the perfect opportunity to talk about and give clues about the gifts you would like.

3.Go online together

Did you remember all the clues while you were sharing fantasies and while you were shopping together? All right then, now is the perfect time to underline all the clues and take away all doubts your partner still could have about what you want. Find your fantasy online and comment on the pictures you show. It might bring on something with your partner.

4.Call in the help of friends

Often friends know what someone would like for Christmas, so it can be the way to find out what your partner wants and it even can be helping to get to your partner about what you want. So ask friends for help, but take it slowly when you want to talk about the “Double Juicer Double Dong”

5.Leave brochures on the table.

When all the clues seem to go in one ear and go out the other, leave brochures on the table, on the bed, in the bathroom or wherever you are sure he ( or she) will find it. Leave it with the corners folded at pages were your favorite goodies are displayed.

If he (or she) doesn’t get this clue, you might talk a little more…


    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    • ismartpc profile image

      Pancho Marana 

      3 years ago from USA

      I have an affiliation with adam and eve toys. Are their prices reasonable enough for people to click on my ad banner?

    • Lazur profile imageAUTHOR


      9 years ago from Netherlands

      Chris, we probably should have talked together in bed *ahum* or gone shopping together, so this Christmas I won't blame you for not listening.

      I did buy you the big prostate massager by the way(a)

    • Christoph Reilly profile image

      Christoph Reilly 

      9 years ago from St. Louis

      If he doesn't "get it" after your advice, he's pretty dumb and should probably be dumped anyway (unless of course he's Adonis and you like that sort of thing.)

      But darn! I wish you had written this a week before. I already go you the Jessica Rabbit thingy!

    • Lazur profile imageAUTHOR


      9 years ago from Netherlands

      The direct approach is indeed the most efficient Anath, but soem people are scared or ashamed to use the direct approach;)

      They probably end up with a new pair of socks:D

    • Anath profile image


      9 years ago

      Very good ideas Lazur. Looking online toguether has always worked for me. The direct approach is also very efficient!


    This website uses cookies

    As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

    For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at:

    Show Details
    HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
    LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
    Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
    AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
    Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
    CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the or domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
    Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
    Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
    Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
    Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
    ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)