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How to get your boyfriend to propose: Ways to get your boyfriend to ask you to marry him

Updated on September 5, 2013
Still dreaming and waiting for your magical moment? If you think that your relationship deserves to be taken to the next level, find out how you can make your guy propose to you.
Still dreaming and waiting for your magical moment? If you think that your relationship deserves to be taken to the next level, find out how you can make your guy propose to you. | Source

How to get your boyfriend to propose to you? Giving your guy hints that you want him to ask you to marry him while slipping a ring on your finger is not easy. The slightest of pressure can make him commitment phobic and put him off from proposing. This post discusses the best ways to make your boyfriend want to get married to you by using casual conversations about love, compatibility, relationship issues, marriage, wedding expenses and more.

1) Ask your boyfriend what he thinks about the future of your relationship

An easy way to make your boyfriend think about making your relationship formal is to ask him about your future as a couple. Here are some subtle yet strong questions you can ask him to get his views and possibly light a spark about marriage in his mind.

  • So where do you see us five years down the line?
  • What do you think the future holds for us?
  • This is our third anniversary as a couple, what do you think about the future?

2) Get your boyfriend to talk about his views on marriage in general

Discussing about the concept of marriage is a nice way to talk about it without putting any pressure. Your goal should be to ask your boyfriend about what he things about marriage in general and not specifically keeping you both in mind. Here are some ideas.

  • Do you think Tom and Kimberley made a good decision to get married?
  • Does the life of a couple change after marriage, what do you think?
  • Do you think a husband flirts with his wife after marriage as much as he did before tying the knot?

These questions will give you an opportunity to take a glimpse into his mind. His answers will reveal his thoughts about marriage and if they seem too negative, you may be able to judge if you are wasting your time in getting him to propose to you.

Flop in your guy's lap after a drink or two and utter a few mushy things about your relationship and it's future.
Flop in your guy's lap after a drink or two and utter a few mushy things about your relationship and it's future.

3) Say silly things about marriage after having a drink or two

The most innocent looking way to talk about marriage is to flop into his arms after a drink or two and talk about the mushiest things about your relationship. Appear drunk and say silly romantic things to your guy, including cute stuff about spending a lifetime with him.

Next morning you can claim innocence about not remembering what you two talked about. But you will have firmly planted the seed of marriage in his mind.

4) Increase his confidence about his financial position

A guy may be trying to delay marriage as long as possible so that his bank balance can cover costs of a wedding and the added responsibilities of being a husband. After all, he doesn't want to be seen as a man who can't provide for his wife and family.

You can play your subtle role in this thought process by making him feel confident about his financial position from time to time. Give him compliments about his saving habits and tell him how his financial goals seem sound and healthy. This will motivate him to reconsider his long term goals, which may include proposing to you.

5) Start discussions about the misconceptions about married life

A guy may have many misconceptions about married life. These are some of the myths glorified by popular culture. Debunk these misconceptions by talking about them. Here are a few ideas.

  • Tell your boyfriend that a couple's life doesn't get boring after marriage
  • Marriage is not only about settling down and having more children, it is also about enjoying romance with your life partner
  • Marriage does not mean the end of freedom, a husband and wife can ideally give each other space in a relationship

6) Talk about your views on wedding expenses: Ring, ceremony and celebrations

Many men look at marriage as a money pit, right from buying an expensive wedding ring to spending life savings on a lavish wedding ceremony with a never-ending guest list.

If you are not the type of woman who craves for a dream wedding at the most luxurious location and someone who does not like to flaunt a large rock on her fingers, make it known to him. This revelation of yours can make your boyfriend breathe a sigh of relief and take away all the negativity and uneasiness associated with the money aspect of a wedding.

Talk about the happily married lives of couples in your own friend circle.
Talk about the happily married lives of couples in your own friend circle.

7) Point out friends who are happily married

You can get your boyfriend to propose to you by showing him real life examples of couples who are married and living happy lives together. Make sure that these couples are ordinary people in your age group so that he can relate your situation as a couple to theirs.

Thinking about a couple's happy married life will put him to ease about any fears or commitment phobia that he has.

8) Get a close friend or family member to talk to your boyfriend about your future as a couple

Involving a third person into your personal life is a risky decision. It can really annoy your boyfriend because he may find the whole idea of discussing your love life with an outsider completely stupid.

But if there is one person in your life who is extremely close to both of you and knows you inside out as a couple, that person could become your helpline. Don't be direct about your wish to get your boyfriend to propose to you, but start a subtle discussion by casually talking about how you feel jealous when you see other married couples.

If that person really knows you both well, your lamenting will be just the spark that is needed for him or her to walk up to your boyfriend and have a heart to heart chat.

9) Randomly start a conversation about the advantages of married life

Movies, TV shows and other means of media in popular culture have in many ways, trained guys to first spot the downfalls of married life, even if they aren't there. Reverse this thinking trend by starting a discussion about the advantages of married life. Here are some ideas.

  • A couple can leverage the power of combined finances to become wealthier
  • All responsibilities in the house are shared and split between two people
  • Partners in a marriage can support each other in their respective careers

Looking at the obvious advantages of tying the knot can easily make a guy reconsider his stand on marriage. If he is really a genuine guy who wants to nurture a long term relationship with you, these things should be just the motivation he needs to propose to you.

10) Don't be obsessed about bringing up marriage discussions

After all the strategizing and planning, you must remember that there is a fine line between giving your boyfriend hints about marriage and obsessing about it.

Don't take it to the point where he feels that you are obsessed with getting married. If that happens, there will instantly be a negative vibe around this topic and your obsession may deal a fatal blow to such a beautiful thing.

Space your conversations out over weeks and months. Don't expect your boyfriend to propose to you after the very first hint that you dropped.

Give your guy a glimpse of how wonderful life can be after marriage.
Give your guy a glimpse of how wonderful life can be after marriage.

11) Show him a sweet glimpse of how it would feel to be your husband

If you have already moved in with your partner, show him a glimpse of how married life can be. Allocate a day on which you can cook up a delicious three course meal and serve it up to him on a platter. Once he gives you a compliment about how much he enjoyed it, drop a hint by telling him that such pampering can be done more often if you had a nice home together.

If you aren't living together, it will be slightly more difficult but it is possible. Plan a weekend trip to a countryside cottage where you can pamper him in a similar fashion. It can take many frustrating efforts to show him that you are indeed, the love of his life. But once his eyes open up to this beautiful fact, he will waste no time in asking you to be his wife.

12) No pressure: Unless it is absolutely necessary, don't give your boyfriend a deadline to propose

Is your urge to get your boyfriend to propose to you justified? Find out by asking yourself these questions.

  • How long has it been since you started dating your boyfriend?
  • Are you and your guy both at a stage in your life when you can be independent?
  • Do you both have jobs?
  • Are you getting to an age where you think that delaying marriage any longer is not a good idea?

Thinking about these questions will give rise to many other thoughts in your head which will actually help you decide if getting married is the right thing to do right now. People get married for various reasons, just make sure that yours is not driven by silly insecurities.

Unnecessary pressure can put your guy off from the very thought about proposing. He may see all your attempts as nagging, a sign that will further reaffirm his fear of trapping himself in a marriage.


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