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How to tell if your Girlfriend or Wife is cheating on you? 12 Signs that she is having an Affair

Updated on May 9, 2013
Anamika S profile image

Anamika S. Jain has been a social media consultant for six years. She has written more than 200 articles on relationships and dating.

How to know if she is cheating on you?

Your intuition could be your best friend if your significant other is cheating on you behind your back. There may be many reasons why a woman may cheat on her partner. Mostly a woman may cheat on her partner when her emotional needs are not met by him. However, that is no excuse to cheat. However, it may not be a difficult task to find out if she is cheating if you keep an eye on her behavior. If her behavior has drastically changed, then it could be a sign that she may be into a new relationship with someone else.

Given below are some tell-tale signs you can look out for to know if your Girlfriend or Wife is having an affair.

How to know if she is cheating on you?
How to know if she is cheating on you?

12 Signs of Infidelity in Women

Infidelity can ruin relationships. If you suspect that your girl is cheating on you behind your back, keep an eye on her behavior. If she is into a new relationship she may display some of the below given signs of infidelity.

1) Drastic changes in Appearance: Has she suddenly become more conscious about her looks? Has she invested on a new wardrobe and beauty treatments? Has she suddenly developed an interest for working out and eating healthy to look slim and sexy? If she was not like that earlier or if that’s how it was when you started dating, then the chances are that she is trying to impress someone else.

2) Not interested in Intimacy: If she has started looking for excuses to avoid intimacy with you or avoiding public display of affection with you, it could be the sign of an affair.

3) You are no longer her first priority: Is she ignoring you all of a sudden? Your wife now has more important things to do that meet up with you or talk with you. She either forgets or cancels her dates with you saying one excuse or the other. She would rather spend time with her girl’s gang than be with you. You no longer seem to be the center of her universe anymore. She no longer refers to you as a couple or shows any interest in doing things which you enjoyed doing together. You may find her mobile phone most of the time switched off or engaged mode. Even if you manage to get hold of her, she may hang up the phone fast giving some excuse. All these could be signs that she may now have a new love interest.

4) She has turned secretive: Has she stopped informing you what is going on with her life altogether? You are no longer aware of what she is doing anymore when earlier she used to give a detailed account of everything about her. Even when you ask her, she either avoids the topic or gives vague replies. She could be doing that because of her fear of getting exposed.

5) She has a new mysterious friend: Does she suddenly have a new mysterious friend whom you know nothing about? She does not reveal much about her new friend even when you ask her. She also does not seem to be interested in you meeting her new friend. Sometimes, this could be the opposite also. She may be full of admiration for a Guy and may talk about him a lot.

6) Suddenly you have become Mr. Perfect: Has she stopped her nagging habit (or she has started it) all of a sudden? She does not seem to be interested in changing you anymore. She has turned indifferent as to what you are doing or how you are doing. If that is not her usual habit, it could be a sign of cheating.

7) She is not interested in meeting your family or friends: She is not keen to be in the company of your friends and family anymore.

8) Simple Questions go unanswered: Even simple questions from you go unanswered. She may get into the defensive mode or question you back most of the times.

9) She has suddenly turned Miss Nice: She has suddenly turned extra nice towards you. She has suddenly started buying gifts or doing things for you. Men and woman may do such unusual things when they are guilty of something.

10) Her friends act strange: If she is cheating on you, most probably her friends would know it and may act weird around you.

11) She lies: She may tell you that she is going somewhere and you may later find out she wasn't even there.

12) Sudden increase in expenditure: Her expenses on car fuel, cosmetics, credit cards, cell phones etc have gone up.

The above given signs could be an indication that your woman may be cheating on you. However, it is best not to jump into conclusions straight away and gather more information before confronting her. Remember that if your accusations turn to be false, you may lose her. So make sure to gather proof first.

Have I left anything? Feel free to add them through comments.


Submit a Comment
  • annanee profile image


    5 years ago from USA

    These are great indicators. However, sometimes we just want to hide from the truth.

  • DDE profile image

    Devika Primić 

    6 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

    How to tell if your Girlfriend or Wife is cheating on you? 12 Signs that she is having an Affair all so true and so well explained. The signs here are just what one should look for in their cheating partners.

  • profile image


    7 years ago

    Usually if the partners know each other well, they know well how to hide secrets and how to avoid getting caught. In case of a cheating or dishonest wife or a Gf, the biggest advantage is one liner question from her "don't you trust me honey?". Men would usually prefer to give a benefit of doubt rather poke into details of any usual incident.

    Some unusual ways to sneak peek would be -

    1. surprisingly visiting the places she is expected to be.

    2. He tastes and flavors in clothing, perfumes and footwear definitely would have changed.

    3. You can feel it, something is not right , by her way of touching or her response when you touch her, coz if he is in her mind , she wont be able to keep herself sane with your touches.

    4. She completely avoids a particular topic, or talk on particular someone, or then finds ways at unusual timings of day or night to fight and get a chance to walk away from house. that way she is sure you wont be contacting him at least for few hours or even care where she is, and she gets it.

    5. Check for numbers saved with wrong names, usually if her cell is "semi public " she would be saving his number with name of some organization , or a name of some of her female friend.

    In short if you are were and are all transparent to your women and she knows in and out of you, then fair chances she knows how to play around with the truth. And when caught , women have this emotional weapon of "Trust" , "I love you and only you" and other crap..



  • Nyamache profile image

    Joshua Nyamache 

    8 years ago from Kenya

    Intuition should guide us to tell us whether she is cheating or not. When she cheats, she will want to cover it up by acting so nicely. Over sudden change of her behaviors gives a hint that there is something fishy going on.

  • rasta1 profile image

    Marvin Parke 

    8 years ago from Jamaica

    Change in appearance and mannerism is one the main things.

  • alocsin profile image

    Aurelio Locsin 

    8 years ago from Orange County, CA

    Everyone things it's only the men who cheat in relationships, but women do it as well -- and their signs are different. Voting this Up and Useful.

  • johnorton profile image


    8 years ago

    Good points you tell anamika. Few points I knew it and few are very new to me. In short if I said why girls cheating a boy this a BIG MYSTERY till today :)

  • homesteadbound profile image

    Cindy Murdoch 

    8 years ago from Texas

    I have ever thought about these things. But once I was reading them, I could see that it would quite possible happen with these things happening.

  • Lord De Cross profile image

    Joseph De Cross 

    8 years ago from New York

    Yay! So many people might relate to these wake up call tips. Thanks Anamika.

  • mbyL profile image

    Slaven Cvijetic 

    8 years ago from Switzerland, Zurich

    For a man, this is precious information. I will keep them in mind hehe, although my girlfriend does not (and hopefully won't ever) display those signs. Very good hub! Voted Up shared and Interesting!

  • IntimatEvolution profile image

    Julie Grimes 

    8 years ago from Columbia, MO USA

    Interesting. I am considering having an affair. Now I know what not to do. Thanks.


  • molometer profile image


    8 years ago from United Kingdom

    Interesting details of what to look out for and the picture is great.

  • Ardie profile image


    8 years ago from Neverland

    Very useful information for a man who thinks his significant other may be cheating. Check for those red flags and listen to your instinct :)


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