- Gender and Relationships
How Clean Is My Window?
I got a forward the other day and this is how the story went.
A young husband and wife moved house and the first morning in their new home, the woman looked out of her window and noticed her neighbour hanging out her washing. ‘Those don’t look clean,’ she said to her husband. ‘She probably uses cheap detergent!’ The husband said nothing.
This happened every morning till one day, the young wife looked out and exclaimed, ‘Hey, her clothes look great today – someone must have taught her how to do it right!’
Her husband replied, ‘I cleaned the windows this morning.’
It was a PowerPoint presentation with beautiful pictures – you can find it here. It got me thinking – how often do I do that? How often do I see through a glass darkly and judge? How often do I need to pull myself up and clean my own windows or better still, open them to see better what's outside?
It happens to all of us. We look around from a position of superiority and wonder how on earth people just can’t be better. What is implicit in that of course, is why they can’t be as good as we are. Why do we do it? Why do we look for the mote in our brother’s eye before we remove the beam from our own?
It happens in the real world, it happens in the virtual world. It’s so much easier to believe a lack in others than to even consider than our own view might be flawed. Is it a sense of lack deep down in us that makes us look hard for the faults in others? Are we conscious of it at all or is it something that springs from the subconscious?
Maybe what it all boils down to is the fact that we don’t love ourselves enough. If we did, it might be easier to love our fellowmen. If we loved ourselves enough, we would accept ourselves for what we are – and there would be no need for any kind of affirmations of how great we are by comparing ourselves with others.
Love is, or should be, so simple. And yet, for most of us, it could be the toughest way to be.