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Husband-and-Wife Quarrel – How Not to Opt for Divorce

Updated on December 10, 2012
Avoid divorce and save your marriage.
Avoid divorce and save your marriage. | Source

So, you’re a newlywed couple. Or, you left the altar a long time ago like 10 or maybe 20 years. No matter which one you and your significant other are, sometimes divorce may be very tempting. As a married couple, there are more chances that you will quarrel with your other half. When this happens and you and your half can’t seem to communicate with each other, divorce is a great temptation. However, you should keep in mind that once you decide to opt for a divorce, you won’t likely be able to go back to change that. You can’t turn back time. Therefore, it is wiser if you try to calm your mind first and think how you can save your marriage instead. Remember that you and your partner were united for one or more reasons. Would you sacrifice those reasons now just for your ego? A lot of divorces happen because of the ego of the couples, just so you know. After all, there are things you can do to avoid divorce. Believe it or not, there are numerous people out there who regret their decision of opting for divorce and lose the love of their life. So, what can you do to avoid divorce?

1. Don’t Value Money Too Much

Well, first and foremost, what you need to do is to change your mind set about the value of money. As a couple, you shouldn’t value money too much. In a recent study involving more than one thousand and seven hundred couples, those who value money so much have a higher tendency to go towards divorce. On the contrary, couples who don’t value money that much have a more stable marriage condition. The latter also exhibit a better quality in their relationship.

2. Don’t Keep the Woman at Home

Now this may sound ironic. However, this argument is supported by Stephanie Coontz. For those who don’t know, Stephanie Coontz is a US writer who has had extensive experiences when it comes to marriage and family affairs. She even has a scholar in family studies as well in addition to history. She believes that women who work outside their home have fewer tendencies towards divorce compared to those who don’t.

3. Housework Is for the Man, Too

Believe it or not, doing housework is actually not taboo at all for the man in a marriage. As mentioned earlier, women shouldn’t be kept at home all the time; they need to be given the opportunity to pursue their dream by working outside their home. Therefore, it may be necessary at times for the men to do the housework. In fact, a study carried out by the Pew Research Center has proven that such a marriage shift has led to happy husbands-and-wives and hence lower divorce rates.

4. Give Some Rooms When Necessary

Although this may well go against the will of most couples, this should actually be done every now and then. There are times when you need to give your half his or her own personal space, even though deep inside the heart you may find it very hard to accomplish. You should know that being apart for some time – not necessarily long, though – results in a better communication between couples. This is also probably because a person – be it the husband or the wife – is very likely to miss his or her other half while separated, making him/her realize how much he/she actually wants to stick with his/her beloved half.

5. Satisfy Your Partner’s Needs

As mentioned earlier, after spending some time apart, you are very likely to miss your significant other. Therefore, when you finally get to stick together again, chances are you will desire an even closer relationship than ever. In this case, it is important for each of you to satisfy your partner’s needs. Well, you can satisfy your partner in bed as a suggestion.

6. Do Small Things That Are Recognizable

If you take small actions for granted, you may well be on your way towards divorce. Some small actions can actually have a great impact, well, as long as you do it at the right time and at the right place. For example, if you are having a negative interaction – such as eye rolling, withdrawal, or sneering – with your partner, you should overlap it with a positive interaction – such as giving your partner a compliment, smiling, or touching. These actions are small yet they are well tangible. As a result, your partner may realize how much you love each other and that divorce is actually not an option at all but a temptation you shouldn’t even think about, let alone opt for. In other words, you won’t have to sign any divorce papers and your marriage stays a happy marriage after all.


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