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My Soul Mate Found Me! A Short Essay On Karma Love and My Beautiful Cambodian Wife!

Updated on June 30, 2012

Mony and Me before we were married!

One of many great pictures that I cherish!
One of many great pictures that I cherish! | Source

My Wife and I Were Married on October 27, 2008

I am so in love with my wife! She really is the most beautiful woman in the world, inside and out!

Our tale is truly a story out of a romance novel. There were so many elements in both of our lives that made it seem impossible that we would ever even meet.

For starters, my wife was born in Cambodia ( <----check out my Hub on it! ) on the other side of the world! If it wasn't for the atrocities that occurred there in the 1970s under the Khmer Rouge, my wife would never have came here as a refugee.

During that time, the Khmer Rouge, led by Pol Pot, was killing many people under a Guerrilla Communist Regime whose goal was to reduce the population of Cambodia by 2/5 and force the remaining citizens into agricultural slave labor .

Somewhere between 4 and 7 million people were killed in less than 5 years because of this horrible part of history. No one knows how many victims there were because there are no official records of each victim's death.

Looking to find something positive out of all this, my wife's family was able to get out of the region early and was protected by the military and lived in a series of refugee camps spread out all of Southeast Asia. She survived, and was granted Automatic Citizenship to the United States as a Refugee. Because of this I was able to meet her!

It was not easy for her to learn the language and customs of our country; everything is different in South East Asia. The food, religion, customs, climate-everything is literally different. But she learned the way of America and did well in school. I should add that Mony came here when she was 12 years old. (She is 38 years old at the time of this publishing; I am 33 years old.)

There are so many great things that I am feeling and many things that I would like to say about Mony, it is hard to know where to begin. Perhaps that is why is has taken me so long to publish this Hub!

I suppose I should begin at the beginning; when it all started...

My life, overall, was pretty good. I was the youngest of 3 (I also have an adopted Brother who is older than I, but we didn't grow up together as he was adopted as an adult) and by the time my parents had me, they were doing pretty well financially, in comparison to my older sisters. I went to private schools, played Hockey, was a Boy Scout, had girlfriends throughout High School; all was pretty well for me.

I had a girlfriend after High School, and at the time I thought I was going to marry her. We were together for 5 years but all we did was argue.The relationship was never sound and we spent our time trying to convince each other that everything was going to work out. Her parent's liked me and I loved the family. Unfortunately, the chemistry was not right in the relationship; all we did was argue and it was always about small, stupid stuff.

Well, when I turned 21 years old and selfish, I began to go to bars... and this is where my troubles began. .. I ended up cheating on my girlfriend and I left her for another woman.

What goes around, comes around; Karma is a Bitch!

Due to the forces of nature and my ignorant self , I found myself stuck in a rut for too many years with this new woman. She was older than me and I thought that I could change her and help her change her lifetime of perpetual bad luck.

I quickly moved into this new girlfriend's house and took over responsibilities of the head of household. The woman I was with was physically abusive, a cheater, and tried to blame me for many things that I did not do. She was a "Drama Queen" and always seemed to have a problem. She needed to always be the center of attention. There was always a problem-nothing ever went smooth. As a result, my family didn't like her and I ended up not speaking with my family for nearly 2 years.

Tragically, the girl that I had left for this woman, died in a car accident 2 years later. I felt like a jerk for cheating, and I never had a chance to apologize! My "new" girlfriend was jealous of my ex and wouldn't even let me mourn the loss of her. She took a fit when I was asked to be a Pall Bearer and she even made a scene when we went to the Wake. I never forgave her for that.

Everywhere we went, she would flirt with other men and I caught her cheating several times (I said that Karma is a Bitch!) One time she messed my face up so bad that I left the state for almost a month so that the cuts and bruises would heal. You have no idea how embarrassing this is for a man to say!

Needless to say, and a long story short, a series of events occurred and we were no longer together. I spent the next 2 1/2 years alone, evaluating my self and reflecting on how I would produce situations that would add to the positive aspect of Karma, related to my life.

The job market was crappy (no Bush jokes intended ) and in my demographic area, there were no jobs. My city experienced an average of 18% unemployment for a long time! I finally found a job working at a factory, and that is where I met my wife!

My wife was never legally married to anyone before me and she was with the same man since she was 19. They had 3 wonderful children together. Oddly enough, the family hierarchy was set up like my own; 2 older girls and the youngest, a boy.

Mony's ex-boyfriend was selfish and was rarely around for my wife and his kids. She raised her 3 kids by herself. Now, they are ages 15, 13, and 11. I am a lucky Step-Dad! (I still hate the word, "Step").

Our oldest has a learning disability but she tries her best all of the time. The youngest is very hyperactive but he is honestly the best boy in the world! Now then there's the middle child...click on this link to learn a little bit about "Middle Child Syndrome ".

I think that this syndrome is very real and that a lot of middle children experience it and display the same behaviors. I know that my sister did! Well, our middle child can be difficult. Sometimes she feels that the other 2 children get more love and attention than she does because of their disabilities. She is constantly looking for negative attention, likes to swear, and the list goes on and on! I can not wait for this difficult phase to end!

The fact is that she doesn't think that my wife loves her as much as she loves the other 2 and that she can do no right in my wife's eyes. She views me as an impostor, who brainwashed her mother into being a disciplinarian. It's definitely not an easy hat to wear!

My wife, no matter what, shows unconditional love to all of her children. She is not only the best Wife in the world; she is also the best Mother! She is always there for the family, cooking (she's a great cook; a mix of Asian and American!), doing laundry and all the other important household things. Of course, I help her!

Mony is a great friend, Mother, Wife, Daughter and I am so blessed that God put us together even though we were 2 worlds apart. I am truly blessed to have her and I look forward to spending the rest of my days with her. If I am lucky, we can go out like Noah and Allie in "The Notebook"!

This article is a tribute to my wife:

Mony, I love you!

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    • J.S.Matthew profile image
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      JS Matthew 4 years ago from Massachusetts, USA

      Thank you Daisy! It will be 5 wonderful years for Mony and me coming this October! Time does fly when you're having fun. Thanks for reading and commenting.

      JSMatthew~

    • Daisy Mariposa profile image

      Daisy Mariposa 4 years ago from Orange County (Southern California)

      J.S.,

      This is such a beautiful love story. Thanks for sharing part of Mony's and your life with us.

    • J.S.Matthew profile image
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      JS Matthew 5 years ago from Massachusetts, USA

      Thank you Marsprofane8! I appreciate your comment!

      JSMatthew~

    • Marsprofane8 profile image

      Marsprofane8 5 years ago from Abuja

      Awesome hub!

    • J.S.Matthew profile image
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      JS Matthew 5 years ago from Massachusetts, USA

      Thank you for the blessings QudsiaP1! I appreciate it very much!

      JSMatthew~

    • QudsiaP1 profile image

      QudsiaP1 5 years ago

      Congratulations, may you and your wife find eternal happiness. :)

    • profile image

      confidence 5 years ago

      for one to make a healthy relationship, you must not put your problem first but consider your partner, he will give it a priority. always seek for the betterment of your partner and not yours always. be contented,and self discipline. don`t be too materialistic; men disgust it so much. see your partner the way he is, change what you don`t like in him but politely. with this i think that one can make a good relationship.

    • J.S.Matthew profile image
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      JS Matthew 5 years ago from Massachusetts, USA

      Hello Dahlia Flower! Thank you for your kind words! I am a lucky man!

      JSMatthew~

    • Dahlia Flower profile image

      Dahlia Flower 5 years ago from Canada

      I enjoyed your story very much. It's so honest. I'm very happy for you and your wife and three children.

    • J.S.Matthew profile image
      Author

      JS Matthew 5 years ago from Massachusetts, USA

      Hello Dr Kavita Shaikh! Thank you for sharing such a true quote! It is great for the kids because it was difficult for them to identify themselves as they grew up exclusively speaking English in school but in a more traditional Khmer home. Now they know they are Cambodian Americans and are proud. I call them "Khmericans"! I shall tell my wife Mony that you said hello! Thanks for stopping by!

      JSMatthew~

    • Dr Kavita Shaikh profile image

      Dr Kavita Shaikh 5 years ago from MUSCAT

      Interesting story, couldn't help quoting the famous saying ' Love knows no boundaries'. It must be a great experience for the kids, who get to experience a mix of both east and west parts of the globe. Say hi to your beautiful wife on my behalf!

    • J.S.Matthew profile image
      Author

      JS Matthew 5 years ago from Massachusetts, USA

      @sunbun143: Hello! I feel very lucky to have found my wife and kids and our families blend well in spite of language barriers. I have been trying to learn Khmer and I do OK with speaking, writing saw say aht saw Khmer is difficult! I actually wrote a Hub on how to speak and write Khmer and I drew all the characters myself! I definitely need more practice.

      I enjoyed your quote, "When you build a house, you'll always have a place to live, but when you build a family, you'll always have a home." That is so true! I am so glad to hear about your own blended family. There are a few people that are either Khmer or from Srok Khmer here on HubPages, but not many! It's nice to meet you! Thanks for your comment!

      PS One of my Khmer Hub friends here from California is Chanroth. She writes a lot of poetry and is really nice. Here's her link: http://hubpages.com/@chanroth If you talk to her, tell her I sent you!

      JSMatthew~

    • sunbun143 profile image

      sunbun143 5 years ago from Los Angeles, CA

      How lucky you two are to have found each other. Family is so valuable...I have always believed..."when you build a house, you'll always have a place to live, but when you build a family, you'll always have a home." I am so happy when I read true love stories. I am married to my college sweetheart and we have two young boys together now (I'm Khmer, he's Korean). We have our own version of a blended family and culture at home. Good luck with yours and keep writing!

    • PDXKaraokeGuy profile image

      Justin W Price 5 years ago from Juneau, Alaska

      j.s., you gotta let her try it. it doesn't work if it's your idea :-)

    • J.S.Matthew profile image
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      JS Matthew 5 years ago from Massachusetts, USA

      That's a new one for me PDX! I'll have to try that!

      JSMatthew~

    • PDXKaraokeGuy profile image

      Justin W Price 5 years ago from Juneau, Alaska

      I call mine MILF sometimes too, but we don't have human kids :-) She prefers to be called a tomcat

    • J.S.Matthew profile image
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      JS Matthew 5 years ago from Massachusetts, USA

      Hi PDX! I have tried to slip in the "cougar" reference and Mony just laughs. (She doesn't care much for MILF though lol!)It doesn't help that she looks younger than me! I am very happy. We are going out to the movies tonight to see "The Descendants". Looks promising! I will have to check out your Hub about your relationship. Thanks for stopping by!

      JSMatthew~

    • PDXKaraokeGuy profile image

      Justin W Price 5 years ago from Juneau, Alaska

      beautiful hub, matthew. I like your story. i recently shared the story of my wife and I as well on Hub Pages. You too look happy. Also, my wife is older then me and I call her cougar. she doesn't like it. How would this work with Mony?

    • J.S.Matthew profile image
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      JS Matthew 5 years ago from Massachusetts, USA

      Thank you Ian! I have had a wonderful birthday and shall enjoy the evening with my love! Thanks for stopping by and for sharing!

      JSMatthew~

    • Ian Dabasori Hetr profile image

      Ian D Hetri 5 years ago from Papua New Guinea

      Very very sweet. A true love story. I will share this with friends on today as you enjoy your birthday with your love.

      Happy celebrations

      Ian

    • J.S.Matthew profile image
      Author

      JS Matthew 5 years ago from Massachusetts, USA

      Thank you praveenadevi! I appreciate your comment and blessings. I was thinking about writing a book about our story. Someday I just might! Thanks for the comment and may God bless you too!

      JSMatthew~

    • praveenadevi profile image

      praveenadevi 5 years ago from Trivandrum, Kerala, India

      I cant believe this..really interesting..we may try for a movie with this story... ;)

      Anyway..Wish you both a very happy and prosperous life in this new year and ever...God bless you..

    • J.S.Matthew profile image
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      JS Matthew 5 years ago from Massachusetts, USA

      @Daniella Lopez: Thank you for your blessings! I am with my family as I type this and it is Christmas Day. We are having a wonderful time! The guests are about to arrive and the food is almost done! I do have a great life! Thanks for stopping by!

      JSMatthew~

    • J.S.Matthew profile image
      Author

      JS Matthew 5 years ago from Massachusetts, USA

      @Steve: I am glad that you found this Hub article by accident! I always like surprises! It's funny how we have similar stories. Sounds like you have a great wife and are doing well and happy! Thanks for stopping by and leaving a comment. I appreciate it!

      JSMatthew~

    • Daniella Lopez profile image

      Danielle Lopez 5 years ago from Arkansas

      This is such a lovely tale! I'm glad that you have found someone that you love so dearly. In this day and age that's so hard to find. Blessed be!

    • profile image

      Steve 5 years ago

      My wife is also Cambodian, wow you blew me away ,almost the same the scenario same to the tee, I took on three boys, just did have not good luck with American women, I was not perfect, by no means, and still not, I guess both our wives surviving the POL Pot thing, don't take thing for grant-it and greatful, the have a man that treats them with respect, and helps out with house hold chores, you know the drill and thanks for posting that, I came across by accident, cumbo42@yahoo.com

    • J.S.Matthew profile image
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      JS Matthew 5 years ago from Massachusetts, USA

      vidhimayur that was such an awesome comment! I am so happy that this inspired you! Thanks so much for stopping by. You made me very happy!

      JSMatthew~

    • vidhimayur profile image

      vidhimayur 5 years ago

      B.E.A.U.T.F.U.L is what all i can say after reading this hub. I don't have enough words to express how much impact your hub has made on me. I have always believed that if your intentions are right and your heart is pure , God will help you out even in difficult situations and once again my belief is strengthened after reading this. Many Thanks for sharing this. I am inspired for my next Hub topic from this hub. will come up with it soon. :).

    • J.S.Matthew profile image
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      JS Matthew 6 years ago from Massachusetts, USA

      Hello bizzymom! I am very lucky and we are lucky to have found each other. I look forward to a wonderful and happy future. Thanks for the awesome comment!

      JSMatthew~

    • bizzymom profile image

      bizzymom 6 years ago from New York

      This is a beautifully written hub. You sound like a great couple. Thanks for sharing your lovely story. You and your wife are very lucky to have each other.

    • J.S.Matthew profile image
      Author

      JS Matthew 6 years ago from Massachusetts, USA

      Hello Spiritsandghosts! I am planning on going as soon as I can. It is tough with 3 kids and it can become very expensive! I am hoping to visit next year. Imagine the Hub I can create once I go there! I wish you and yours the best of happiness and I thank you for your comment!

      JSMatthew~

    • Spiritsandghosts profile image

      Thalia Bhandari 6 years ago from Melbourne, Victoria, Australia

      Your story reminds me of my story. The only difference is that I met my husband on my travels overseas. My husband is from Nepal.

      I encourage you to visit Cambodia as soon as you can. You will love it! You know about the people, but the food, the culture, the amazing warmth you will feel is out of this world.

      As my grandmother used to say, "If you can do it now, do it!" So that's my advice to you too....go to Cambodia! You both look like wonderful people...I wish you both all the best...blessings Thalia (spiritsandghosts)

    • J.S.Matthew profile image
      Author

      JS Matthew 6 years ago from Massachusetts, USA

      It does seem like a fairy tale sometimes Kawaljit kaur! I feel very lucky to have such great family. I agree that family is one of the most important things in life. I appreciate your blessings and may you be blessed as well! Thank you for the awesome comment!

      JSMatthew~

    • Kawaljit kaur profile image

      Kawaljit kaur 6 years ago from JALANDHAR, Punjab (India)

      it is really like a fairy tale. I am very happy about you and your family. we Indians are very much family oriented and groomed that way. Although our cultures are different, but the family meanings are the same. May God bless you all and you cherish every moment in your life.

    • J.S.Matthew profile image
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      JS Matthew 6 years ago from Massachusetts, USA

      @NotSoPerfect: I appreciate your comment! Everything does work out in the end. Thanks for your blessings and I wish the same upon you and your family! Thanks for stopping by!

      JSMatthew~

    • J.S.Matthew profile image
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      JS Matthew 6 years ago from Massachusetts, USA

      @TattooKitty: I agree with you about negative karma. It goes both ways. We reap what we sow! I don't really believe in coincidence so I had to have bad experiences to recognize the good. Thanks for stopping by!

      JSMatthew~

    • NotSoPerfect profile image

      NotSoPerfect 6 years ago from United States

      What a beautiful and interesting read. I am so happy for you and your wife; true love is hard to find indeed. It took me a while; and from what I read on your hub, it took you a while, too. But everything works out in the end doesn't it? God bless you guys and looking forward to your next hub! Voted up, beautiful and interesting. Great work!

    • TattooKitty profile image

      TattooKitty 6 years ago from Hawaii

      What a riveting story of love!! Voted up and beautiful!

      Although I agree with your thoughts on karma, I also believe that our negative experiences in life happen for a reason. Perhaps your soul needed to learn from the experiences w/your ex in order to truly appreciate the love you have now...

    • J.S.Matthew profile image
      Author

      JS Matthew 6 years ago from Massachusetts, USA

      Thank you all for your comments! I appreciate them!

      JSMatthew~

    • homesteadbound profile image

      Cindy Murdoch 6 years ago from Texas

      That is truly a wonderful love story. Thank you so much for sharing. Now it's time to get to the best part ... living happily ever after.

    • plinka profile image

      plinka 6 years ago from Budapest, Hungary

      It's so romantic and the best thing is that you are aware of that you've found your other half. A lot of people don't even know how lucky they are.

    • jacqui2011 profile image

      jacqui2011 6 years ago from Leicester, United Kingdom

      I am so glad that you both ended up together against all the odds. It's lovely to hear. Best wishes to you and your family.

    • J.S.Matthew profile image
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      JS Matthew 6 years ago from Massachusetts, USA

      Thank you for the interesting comment whoisbid. Good luck to you as well!

      JSMatthew~

    • whoisbid profile image

      whoisbid 6 years ago

      hey dude. i speak asian languages so I know about asia. I think cambodian women can be cool Good luck and Pax Vobiscum

    • J.S.Matthew profile image
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      JS Matthew 6 years ago from Massachusetts, USA

      Thanks rachealomack! I appreciate your comment.

      JSMatthew~

    • rachealomack profile image

      rachealomack 6 years ago from levittown, NY

      Beautiful!

    • J.S.Matthew profile image
      Author

      JS Matthew 6 years ago from Massachusetts, USA

      @Maralexa: I really appreciate your comment. I love to help people and since I have been here a while and am a HubGreeter, I am able to help so many people who are grateful. My wife is very supportive and I am lucky for that as I do spend quite a bit of time on HubPages! I appreciate your blessings and thanks for the awesome comment!

      JSMatthew~

    • J.S.Matthew profile image
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      JS Matthew 6 years ago from Massachusetts, USA

      @Binaya: Thank you my friend! I always appreciate and look forward to your comments!

      JSMatthew~

    • Maralexa profile image

      Marilyn Alexander 6 years ago from Vancouver, Canada and San Jose del Cabo, Mexico

      Your being here at Hubpages makes a great impact on many of us. You seem constantly here to support and praise. I notice that you pick-up on comments other hubbers have made and you can hone in on problems and really give others a hand.

      The reason you are able to do this so well is, I am sure, that you have such a loving and supportive wife and a wonderful family.

      Truly, I thank you for sharing--the good and the bad. May you continue to give and receive many blessings in your life.

    • profile image

      Binaya.Ghimire 6 years ago

      Yours is a beautiful love story. Yours anecdotes are amusing and full of inspiration. You are brave and honest.

    • J.S.Matthew profile image
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      JS Matthew 6 years ago from Massachusetts, USA

      Thanks for the well wishes AliciaC! We are very happy. I appreciate your comment.

      JSMatthew~

    • AliciaC profile image

      Linda Crampton 6 years ago from British Columbia, Canada

      Your story has such a beautiful ending. It's wonderful that both you and your wife are happy after you both had a difficult past. Best wishes for the future!

    • J.S.Matthew profile image
      Author

      JS Matthew 6 years ago from Massachusetts, USA

      Thanks so much Victoria! I appreciate your comment and I feel very lucky to have my soul mate! Thanks for stopping by and commenting once again!

      JSMatthew~

    • Victoria Lynn profile image

      Victoria Lynn 6 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      Voted up across the board. Beautiful, touching tribute to your wife. Your relationship sounds like the real deal. I think that few people find that real, undeniable, and almost easy connection, and the rest of us have to work at it until we get tired of it and have to move on. Yours sounds like a soulmate thing. Happy for you. Beautiful hub!

    • J.S.Matthew profile image
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      JS Matthew 6 years ago from Massachusetts, USA

      Thanks brakel2! I am in the (slow) process of writing a book and this will be the basis for the second part. I really appreciate your comment. Thanks so much for stopping by!

      JSMatthew~

    • brakel2 profile image

      Audrey Selig 6 years ago from Oklahoma City, Oklahoma

      What a fascinating story of love. You should write a book, as your lives took so many turns. Your article is very well organized and well written. You have many followers who make good comments about you. I wish you many years of happiness and good luck with the children and also your writing.

    • J.S.Matthew profile image
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      JS Matthew 6 years ago from Massachusetts, USA

      Thank you jagandelight! You make an awesome point here. I will try to refer to them as my kids, not my step-kids. Great insight! Thanks for the comment.

      JSMatthew~

    • jagandelight profile image

      jagandelight 6 years ago from Florida

      Congrats to you and your beautiful wife.

      You don't like the word "step" then I would suggest you drop that word all together and refer to the children as yours. This is my daughter and son if that's what truly in your heart. Children will take notice of your claim that they are yours no matter what and the circumstances of how they came to be yours does not matter, it gives them an added sense of security even if they don't show it right away.

    • J.S.Matthew profile image
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      JS Matthew 6 years ago from Massachusetts, USA

      That's right bwhite062007; life is a journey! I am happy to be where I am. Thanks for the read and comment!

      JSMatthew~

    • bwhite062007 profile image

      Brianna 6 years ago from East Coast

      Beautiful Hub! You have to go through life and all it's lessons to finally get to a good ending.

    • J.S.Matthew profile image
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      JS Matthew 6 years ago from Massachusetts, USA

      Thanks alphagirl! We both are lucky to have found each other! I appreciate your comment!

      JSMatthew~

    • alphagirl profile image

      alphagirl 6 years ago from USA

      what a story. You have learned from your mistakes and were given an opportunity to make things right. That is great! You are both lucky. Congrats.

    • J.S.Matthew profile image
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      JS Matthew 6 years ago from Massachusetts, USA

      Thanks for the wonderful comment happypuppy! I plan on adding our story to a novel I started years ago-if I can find the time! Thanks again!

      JSMatthew~

    • happypuppy profile image

      happypuppy 6 years ago

      Thanks for sharing this touching story with us. I felt as if I was reading a romance novel. Happy for you both for finding your soulmate.

    • J.S.Matthew profile image
      Author

      JS Matthew 6 years ago from Massachusetts, USA

      Escobana I am glad that you loved the story! You are most welcome for the greeting-feel free to contact me if you have any questions. Thanks for stopping by!

      JSMatthew~

    • Escobana profile image

      Escobana 6 years ago from Valencia

      I started to read and couldn't stop:-) Loved the story!

      Thanks for welcoming me a few days ago:-)

      True Love is beautiful when you've found it!

    • J.S.Matthew profile image
      Author

      JS Matthew 6 years ago from Massachusetts, USA

      I appreciate your blessings Alyssa Nichol! Thank you so much!

      JSMatthew~

    • Alyssa Nichol profile image

      Alyssa 6 years ago from Ohio

      What a great hub! Kudos to you for finding that positive light.. :) I wish you many years of happiness and love with your family... :)

    • J.S.Matthew profile image
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      JS Matthew 6 years ago from Massachusetts, USA

      Thanks daisyf1305! Love is great but can be stressful at times. We just have to count our blessings! Thanks for stopping by.

      JSMatthew~

    • daisyf1305 profile image

      Daisy Fabelo 6 years ago from miami beach

      That is so sweet... I love love but sometimes it's get's lost in all the life.

    • J.S.Matthew profile image
      Author

      JS Matthew 6 years ago from Massachusetts, USA

      Thank you! I appreciate your comment!

      JSMatthew~

    • fabulouslyfit profile image

      fabulouslyfit 6 years ago

      I am glad that you found your "True Love" it's nice to have a soul mate!

    • J.S.Matthew profile image
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      JS Matthew 6 years ago from Massachusetts, USA

      @KMattox: Thanks for the insightful comment and the well-wishes. I appreciate that. I wish you the same as well.

      JSMatthew~

    • vitalesweets profile image

      vitalesweets 6 years ago from Upstate NY

      Not much to say except this is a beautiful account on the love you two share and your obviously admiration for your wife. I feel so happy for all she seems to have brought to your life :)

    • KMattox profile image

      KMattox 6 years ago from USA

      JSMatthew

      Great hub. I can relate. I have been through a few things myself over time. You expressed yourself very eloquently. True deep and meaningful relationships are complex and understanding is needed by both partners as you and your wife seem to have. I have been wit my wife a long time chronologically. We have dealt with a great deal of health and emotional issue and the loss of loved ones. As you know the commitment level you show your wife has to be 100%. I can see that you are committed. I wish you many years of happiness. You're both lucky.

    • J.S.Matthew profile image
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      JS Matthew 6 years ago from Massachusetts, USA

      Thanks for the wonderful comment spirit929! I am in a much better place these days. I am so glad that I got out of my past relationship. Who knows, maybe I would have ended up dead! Thanks for stopping by!

      JSMatthew~

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      spirit929 6 years ago from Upstate NY somewhere over the rainbow

      JS...congrats to the both of you for being incredible to each other and to yourselves! I can undersatnd what you have been through, I know what you are talking about when it came to your chaotic relationship with your Ex, thank God you are out of that and now have a normal life with someone you love and who loves you back just as much. There is true love in this world afterall! Thanks for publishing this incredible story, you both are an inspiration to us all!

    • J.S.Matthew profile image
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      JS Matthew 6 years ago from Massachusetts, USA

      Oooooo! Make sure to come back here and post the link to your Hub in my comments so others can read it! Thanks.

      JSMatthew~

    • J.S.Matthew profile image
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      JS Matthew 6 years ago from Massachusetts, USA

      adeaugustus I appreciate your comment. You know, I started a novel about 4 years ago but never finished it. I am thinking about incorporating this story into the book. Now I just need the motivation! Thanks for your kind words!

      JSMatthew~

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      giselenmendez 6 years ago from Berlin, Germany

      :) I wish you two the best of lucks as well!

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      JS Matthew 6 years ago from Massachusetts, USA

      giselenmendez thanks for stopping by! It sounds like you are very happy in your marriage. I wish you the best of luck and happiness. Love is very powerful! I appreciate you sharing and leaving this wonderful comment!

      JSMatthew~

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      giselenmendez 6 years ago from Berlin, Germany

      All you need is love :) I am in love with my husband, even though we've been married for a couple of years I am positive that he will always be the man of my life. And thanks to that love we share, we've been able to plan a whole future together, building the life we've always wanted but we couldn't have in our country.

      Love is powerful, right?

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      JS Matthew 6 years ago from Massachusetts, USA

      Thanks for the comment u01dtj6!

      JSMatthew~

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      u01dtj6 6 years ago

      Great story! Thank you for sharing this with us.

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      JS Matthew 6 years ago from Massachusetts, USA

      What an awesome comment mistykay! I appreciate that and I believe it is destiny. Thanks for stopping by.

      JSMatthew~

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      mistykay 6 years ago from Philippines

      Wow very touching story, I feel like crying..It's destiny I believed.

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      JS Matthew 6 years ago from Massachusetts, USA

      @BukowskiBabe: I couldn't have said that better myself. It takes a real man to be a Dad, anyone can be a father. Thanks for the great comment!

      JSMatthew~

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      JS Matthew 6 years ago from Massachusetts, USA

      @KRYONpop: What an awesome comment! I really appreciate that. Thank you!

      JSMatthew~

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      BukowskiBabe 6 years ago from Somewhere in the middle of it all.

      What a beautiful, inspiring testimonial of your life. My husband is a stepdad too, and he too, hates the word. He really has been the only father my daugther has ever known. I say this beause he knows how to parent. Most anyone can procreate, but not all know how to step in, and be a dad. I say this as an adopted child. Thank you for sharing.

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      KRYONpop 6 years ago

      Awwwww. This is so sweet! It's great that your found solace in the arms of your wife. Really lucky find! Especially when you both could end up having difficulties in terms of your culture. As the song goes: Two less lonely people in the world and I just can't believe you're mine. Cheers to you two love birds and I hope the end for your love never comes and if it would, only in forever :)

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      JS Matthew 6 years ago from Massachusetts, USA

      Thank you Xkom! That was a wonderful comment and I appreciate it. I am blessed indeed! Thank you for stopping by and for the inspirational comment!

      JSMatthew~

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      Xkom 6 years ago from Zambia

      It's a beautiful Story J.S Matthew. It is a blessing that you people you found each other and you are a true testimony that there are soul mates out there and its quite rare to find your own especially in your case its across culture. For those in abusive relations please look out - a living example is here. You are both blessed to have each other. Congrats and may the almightyGod give you many more happy years and possibly inspire more couples.

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      JS Matthew 6 years ago from Massachusetts, USA

      As I am a lucky man! Thanks for the comment break up books!

      JSMatthew~

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      break up books 6 years ago

      What a romantic and beautiful hub, your wife is a lucky woman!

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      JS Matthew 6 years ago from Massachusetts, USA

      Amen, manthy. Thank you!

      JSMatthew~

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      Mark 6 years ago from Alabama,USA

      God-Bless both of you - Love is a good thing

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      JS Matthew 6 years ago from Massachusetts, USA

      Thanks for stopping bye and leaving a comment aprilking! Thanks for the blessings and well wishes as well.

      JSMatthew~

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      aprilking 6 years ago from United States

      That was utterly amazing. I truly enjoyed reading this. I wish you many more beautiful blessings for you and your family :)

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      Laurel Rogers 6 years ago from Bishop, Ca

      ;) Really!

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      JS Matthew 6 years ago from Massachusetts, USA

      I agree lorlie6; I am truly blessed! Cambodia is not pat of Indonesia but I got what you meant. I doubt that anyone is offended! I appreciate you commenting. Thanks for stopping by!

      JSMatthew~