I Told My Wife I Wear Panties And She Hates It – What Now?
An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure, especially when it comes to relationship compatibility issues, and this applies to everyone and everything, not just men who wear women's clothes.
Before I start this article, I just want to say this: If you know that there is something about you which puts you outside the cultural norms of intimacy, for god's sake, tell your partner about it before you get married, okay? Seriously.
Of course, for some people this advice comes far too late. They are in established relationships with financial and family ties which are not easily nor painlessly broken, and they have revealed their love of lingerie to a partner who finds it either unbearable or a total turn off. They spun the wheel of surprise cross dressing acceptance and happened to come up a dud. It's not the end of the world.
These things happen. As much as I support men who wear lingerie and other items of women's clothing, every woman has the right to say what she does and does not find attractive. If she doesn't find panties on a man attractive, there isn't much you, or I, or anyone else can do to change her mind. And to be honest, it isn't fair to try to make her, or to guilt her. If you have an established relationship, then you had the chance to come clean with her many years ago and chose not to. There's a saying about making beds and lying in them and I'm afraid that's just part of being a grown up. Sometimes things don't turn out the way we would have wished them to and sometimes we make mistakes.
If you have lived for 30 years in the proverbial panty closet I think we both know you're not going to stop wearing women's clothing any time soon. So, honestly, I think it is best that you continue to wear womens things when your wife is not around. Most wives don't care if their husband indulges his little fancies as long as they are not shoved in her face. This is obviously far from an ideal situation, but if it is the situation you find yourself in, I say enjoy your private panty life and respect your wife's wishes. You have a life time built up together and that is more important than insisting she suddenly come to terms and be joyfully accepting of the fact that the love of her life has turned out to be a cross dresser.
Fortunately for men who wear women's clothing, clothing is something that can be utterly and thoroughly enjoyed in privacy. Don't feel guilty or ashamed, just pursue your happiness in a sensitive and practical fashion.
Don't lie to her and say that you're not doing it anymore when you are. Just tell her that you won't do it around her. That ought to be enough. If she doesn't want to talk about it, don't force her to. Most women who find the idea of their husband in women's clothing unattractive simply don't like to think about it. If she wants to stick her head in the sound and pretend lingerie doesn't exist in men's sizes, then let her.