ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

I’m A Gay Man And I Don’t Need Your Acceptance Straightees But Thanks Anyway!

Updated on January 26, 2011


I recently wrote about the fact that I despise the word, “acceptance” when it comes to describing how others perceive me. I don’t need the “acceptance” of anyone but a school (if I’m trying to get in) or a lender if I’m trying to buy a car or house. These things you can be accepted or rejected for but when it comes to what I do in my bedroom or whom I choose to share my life with, the only one who needs to “accept” these thing are me and the person with whom I’m sharing my life. I don’t need to be accepted to pay my taxes and yet I’m still treated as though I’m a single person when I’ve been with the same man for 22 years while our straight counterparts get tax breaks and a ton of other “rights” not afforded my spouse and me. Should I be begging the Federal government to “accept” my relationship? I don’t think so and I’m so thankful for the collective consciousness in this country that seems to be starting to “get it” so that these rights will eventually come our way but in the meantime, don’t accept me, it’s not your job. And while we’re on the subject, don’t “tolerate” me either cause if you’re one of those people who are using this language or “loving the sinner and hating the sin” then you need to know I’m so fed up with you I’d like to shove my foot so far up your ass that we have to go to a hospital to remove it. I’m a gay man and I don’t need your acceptance straightees but thanks anyway! – Don’t Get Me Started!

A recent clip I saw of Pastor Joel Osteen on the Piers Morgan show had him once more spouting his belief that homosexuality is wrong. While not as vehement as the crazy in the head me-thinks-he-doth-protest-too-much Rick Santorum, I respect the fact that these men should be allowed to speak their mind. What I wonder is why is anyone asking these guys this question anymore? You know what the answer is, you know that they believe that homosexuality is some sort of deviant behavior that “the gays” choose to do to destroy civilization and a God fearing country. We all know how they feel. So other than trying to get a sound byte that can be played endlessly on supposed “news” broadcasts or on gay sites and blogs that will no doubt be a field day for some Cheetoh’s stained finger person sitting in a darkened room with their fourteen cats and a dirty metal wobbly snack tray that holds their Big Gulp typing passages from the bible with some random screen name like “apostle34872” under the comments section, what is the point at this point?

For those who study psychology out there you may be saying to yourself, “Why does Scott have such a problem with that word, ‘acceptance’? Could it be that he himself is tired of trying to be ‘accepted’?” Well if you said that, you’re partially right. You see, what becomes of a “people pleaser” person who has spent their entire life making sure everyone else in the world is happy instead of themselves when they reach their forties? This is what happens! I suppose it’s a little like the red hat ladies (who I once wrote about and was lambasted by some of these so-called “ladies” -  you get to a point in your life where you’re tired of hoping you’ll be taller or a zillionaire by coming up with the new Snuggie or something. You reach a point where you finally look yourself in the mirror and can see a person who is moderately attractive inside and out and you realize that this is as good as you’re going to get so why not just enjoy the view, the ride of your life and the wind in your hair (the little you have left) as it goes racing by. (A good quote to be sure but please don’t put it on your Facebook as your status or tweet it, I leave those things for the Facebook philosophers who can’t make anything in their life work but are constantly updating their status with these types of quotes – those who can’t live philosophize is my new thought on those people!)

So while I’ll admit that some of my aversion to the word, “acceptance” or “tolerance” is fueled by my own mental illness (I’m convinced we all have our own mental illnesses it’s just that some of us are better at hiding it most of the time) there is something about the judgment that comes along with these words that just pisses me off. I admit that I judge people daily. The women with the tops too short, the pants too tight all that allow their midsections to spill out over their clothes like “The Blob” oozing out of the doors of the movie theatre in the classic horror film. The men who make fun of gay gays for being too effeminate when they themselves have plucked their eyebrows within an inch of their lives and are wearing a glitzy Ed Hardy shirt that makes them look like a modern day Liza Minnelli. I sit as judge and jury on all of the world as it unfolds around me. But I don’t accept, reject or tolerate it. I simply laugh at them, shake my head and go about my day feeling a little better about myself. So while I appreciate that you think you’re doing a noble thing by accepting me, I’m here to tell you that you needn’t bother. I’m a gay man and I don’t need your acceptance straightees but thanks anyway! – Don’t Get Me Started!

Read More Scott @


    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    • mwatkins profile image

      mwatkins 6 years ago from Portland, Oregon & Vancouver BC

      sad but true-great job! You Give a great testimony!I could use the same argument for many groups of people who are "accepted."

      Thank you!

    • K9keystrokes profile image

      India Arnold 6 years ago from Northern, California

      At the top of my favorites list this week! Up and awesome Scott.


    • livelonger profile image

      Jason Menayan 6 years ago from San Francisco

      Hilarious, and, at the same time, sadly true. And, yes, the evangelists have to believe we're evil deviants trying to wreck western civilization, in order to feel better about themselves doing much worse things that their religion tells them will send them straight to hell.

      I personally can't wait until we're finally fully equal under the law, at which point we can just ignore the crackpots and other people who can just barely "accept" or "tolerate" us.

    • somelikeitscott profile image

      somelikeitscott 6 years ago from Las Vegas

      You and me both, sister! (Or should I just say other inahbitant of our shared planet?)

    • Earth Angel profile image

      Earth Angel 6 years ago

      Hey I thought we had moved on to 'equal!' Actually, I will be happy when the day comes and the labels are left off entirely! Love you! EarthAngel!