ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel
  • »
  • Gender and Relationships»
  • Advice & Tips for Women in Relationships

Inner Beauty is More Important Than The Outward Appearance Or Is It What Ugly People Say to Themselves to Feel Better

Updated on November 15, 2014

Inner Beauty is More Important Than The Outward Appearance

Outer beauty is desirable physical features such as eyes, lips, body size, weight, and hair. Anything that can be touched, measured. Daily, we are bombarded with images of certain standards of masculine and feminine beauty. Looking your best takes work, and many women put so much effort into fixing up the outside when the inside is what counts? But to be honest, outward appearance also counts, but the real gift you can give your husband is a loving, respectful, and godly spirit. Inner beauty is defined as intangible, something that’s experienced through a person’s character rather than by appearances. There are things we cannot see, touch or measure with the physical eye. These are inner qualities such as charm, wit, tact, sense of humor, etc.

On A daily basis you cannot turn on the T.V. without a weight loss advertisement glaring at the women from the screen. Really, some women would rather starve than be fat. And women cringe at the athletic prowess of some of our finest athletes and financial power brokers, because for most women those traits are most desirable in a mate. Yet we are too familiar with the headlines of some of the coveted beautiful people in court for anything from divorce, drug addiction, to assault charges. No matter how beautiful you may look from outside, you will not have any peace if you are not beautiful and peaceful from inside. Peace and serenity come from deep within.

The argument is an old one. Which is more important? Does it matter if you have a pleasing physical appearance with a nasty attitude? 1 Peter 3:3-4 says “Do not let adornment be merely outward – arranging the hair, wearing gold, or putting on fine apparel. Rather let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the incorruptible beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is very precious in the sight of God.”

Peter did not mean that women should forget completely about outward beauty. But he was saying that women should not depend upon the outward appearance, because it is the lovely spirit within that really makes them beautiful. Inner beauty makes you spiritual and helps you in providing a platform to connect with God.

I’m not only talking about looks, but also about your behavior and the way you talk to him. That your soft voice and the endearments you used to catch will still be necessary to retain him. Publius Syrus wrote, “Speech is a mirror of the soul; as a man (woman) speaks, so is he (she). Words can hurt feelings and destroy relationships.

More people have been hurt by an improper choice of words than by any natural disaster. These are part of your attractiveness. Men hate nagging wives. It is not fair that you switch your attractive qualities while you dated now that you are married. You wouldn’t like him to do the same to you.

In order to make yourself beautiful from inside, you don’t need to spend a fortune on cosmetics and stuff. All you need to do is be a good person. It makes you rise above money. Certainly the inner person is the true gift –the hearts, character, personality, soul. 1 Samuel 16:7 says, “But the Lord said unto Samuel, look not on his countenance or on the height of the stature; because I have refused him: for the Lord seeth not as man seeth; for man looketh on the outward appearance, but the Lord looketh on the heart.”

But a gift of such value really ought to be packaged nicely, that is why Christmas gift to loved ones are beautifully wrapped. As much as we wish people didn’t notice outward appearance, the reality is the humans are designed to have an eye for beauty. We are born with a deep longing for and appreciation of beauty. A nicely wrapped gift builds anticipation and intrigue for what’s inside. It says to the receiver, “You’re important to me, so I took the time to make this gift look lovely for you. It leads the receiver to believe that underneath all the wrapping is something to be valued.

Expensive makeup or the perfect haircut cannot change who we are on the inside. Inner beauty is longer lasting compared to outer beauty since courage, wisdom and skills never grow old. Your face will be conquered by wrinkles and impending death, but your inner beauty will live forever. It is eternal. It will never die.

Besides, inner beauty leads to greater self-fulfillment and personal success. There are women who don’t have perfect features or wear the latest styles, yet they have a glow. There are also outwardly lovely people who, with snide comment or snarled look, ruin their image of pseudo beauty. Inner Beauty radiates from the spirit; it is a sign of good mental and emotional health. External physical beauty alone will not help you in connecting with people emotionally. Rather it makes you aloof and alone. What you need is your inner beauty to feel connected with people you love. Inner beauty makes people fall in love with you. Inner beauty helps you appreciate outer beauty. If you love, appreciate and feel good about yourself, you would feel more confident about facing and interacting with men.

Inner beauty makes you a beautiful person. You may think it’s a chiseled face or gorgeous physique that makes a person attractive. But more than anything else, it’s a person’s inner belief that they’re attractive that makes them more appealing to others. A sexy body doesn’t guarantee a beautiful heart. It is the inner beauty, kindness and generosity of your heart that makes you a beautiful person.

While no woman should allow herself to become a slave to fashion, still it is important to cultivate the love of adornment, ever-keeping it within due bounds, remembering that outward adornment should be secondary to the adornment of the soul.” This is equally supported by this verse from the Bible which says, “The greatest beauty is the one that radiates from inside. The inner beauty comprises of love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.” (Galatians 5:22-23)

The loss of self-respect, the loss of character, is irreparable. On the other hand, the consciousness of the genuineness of purity of heart multiplies one’s power; increases her confidence, elevates her ideals, and gives a general lift of life along the line of endeavor. Charming manners that disguise a poor character may work in the short run, but character reveals itself rather quickly. To have a character founded on good principles is the first and indispensable qualification of a good woman. It imparts life and strength and beauty not only to individual character, but to all around.

“Do unto others as you would have others do unto you,” is a Biblical injunction. Why have couples failed so miserably to appropriate and apply this way of life? Today, ethical rules of conduct have taken back seat to cheating, domestic violence, and many other evils.

Every action you take, every decision you make, everything you do causes immediate effect on those around you and on you. Your actions will dictate whether in general your life is going to run happily, or badly, smoothly or as if the wheels have fallen off. If you are selfish and manipulative it’ll rebound on you. If you’ve generally loving and thoughtful you’ll get your just reward.

Every act and every thought is like a seed. We find pretty much what we are looking for. Give kindness and love, and kindness and love come back to you. Give hatred, indifference or scorn, and your return is hatred, indifference or scorn.

A well poised body, while expressing a well-poised character, reacts in turn on that character to help and enrich the whole personality. To bear oneself with grace and kindly dignity is to foster and breed graciousness and self-respect, as well as to disseminate them. A large part of that strange personal potency which we call magnetism is the direct and inevitable result of fine poise. While personal magnetism is primarily a spiritual power and has its sources in the soul, it yet must find its avenues of expression through the body.


So which is more important? Outer beauty has its place. Everyone likes to look beautiful. Let's face it, it is the first thing that a potential mate or date sees. But you may speak to someone for a minute and find them pleasant or unpleasant at first. But as the conversation goes on for a minute or two, you may start to pick qualities and traits, and without even realizing it, you may start to find a person more and more beautiful or charming.

Inner beauty has benefits like growth, self-acceptance, and love. While outer beauty, has a self-destructive component to it. For example, poor self-image or low self-esteem because of one's size or physical attributes. I believe inner beauty is most important. Why because the better the character inside of a person the more that person has to contribute to self and society. Inner beauty touches people on levels that outer beauty cannot. A beautiful heart is more important than a beautiful body. It’s good to have a beautiful face, but what is more important is to have a beautiful soul. Always remember that your inner beauty is more important than your outside appearance and looks. When you know that you are a better person with a good heart, there’s this incredible confidence that you gain. It shows in everything that you do. Appearances are often deceptive. That’s why it is important to concentrate on one’s inner beauty. This will help you in judging right from wrong; thereby helping you make the right choice while choosing your life partner and friends.


    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    • MsDora profile image

      Dora Weithers 23 months ago from The Caribbean

      I hear you, Chuksm. Inner beauty displays itself on the outside; it does not work the other way around. It's time we really concentrate on what matters most.