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Internet Dating Secrets for Men

Updated on March 5, 2016
Jeff Watters profile image

Jeff Watters is a business consultant & freelance author who lives in Havre de Grace, MD, former manager of Mattress stores & AWAI member.

Getting to that first kiss

Internet Dating for Guys

A How to Guide for Men

I have been dating online off and on for some time and always find lots of women to date. In this article, I am going to share my profile information with the suggestion that you copy it and rewrite it, so it is tailored to you. I am also going to point out some "do’s and do not" of dating and talking on the phone.

Let’s get started

The first tip, when a woman contacts you don’t suggest going to a restaurant at first. Dating can be pretty expensive if you are picking up the check. The alternative idea is to meet for coffee and “pleasant conversation” to see where it goes. Coffee is pretty cheap, and you can meet a lot of people to talk, thus helping you pick your ideal mate. By meeting for coffee, you can save a few bucks and eliminate the women that are not your "cup of tea" or is that coffee?

Telephone Tip

You will need to talk on the phone before you get to the date. You know that, and there is one point I want to cover here, don’t talk about sex. If the subject of sex is brought up either move beyond it quickly or ask if you can talk about it when you know each other better. You should not be the one to bring up sex either. Use some common sense; if she brings it up, she could be testing you and your morals. Your morals are good right, so tell her you can discuss it when she knows you better.

Your Picture

Then comes your picture. Don’t take a selfie with your shirt off. Yes, you look sexy but let it show through with your smile and a nice fitting shirt. Women want a respectable man, and that is you. So don’t flash the skin, it will get there with the right lady. Also, remember to smile with your eyes in your picture. Upload photos of showing you are having fun with friends and family. You are a natural, and your picture should show it.

The First Date

Flowers on a first date are for losers. I don’t care how hot she is... flowers are for Mothers Day, Birthdays, apologies, and special occasions. Dating you is not a special occasion. However, it is an opportunity for her to know you better. No Flowers Dude! No Candy Either!

Finally don’t be in a hurry to get to the first date. Women like a man that will take the time to know her. Getting to know her shows respect, and you are a man worthy of that regard. Things will take a natural course, and some people are quicker than others, but rushing is not going to win you points unless she suggests an early meeting. If she does and you think it may be a good connection go for it, but stick to the coffee house and see if you were right.

Believe it or not, chicks lie on their profiles all the time. Once I met a woman in her 40's who used an old picture. Wow, what a change. You might even suggest her taking a selfie in the parking lot, so you know what outfit to look for when she comes in the shop. A slick idea to eliminate the liars right up front.


Yup, we love it, and we want it, and they know it. So you can expect a few barriers here my friend. There are lots of things to consider besides instant gratification. Things like Herpes, HIV, and a lot of stuff you will regret having for a few minutes of pleasure. Your preacher was right about adultery even though no one paid attention to him. If you are going to use it, wrap it. Nuff said? I hope so.

Now I am assuming here you are going to use my layout of an ad below. If you do, I am sure you will get plenty of dates, especially you men over 40. Here is a general ad you can use that shows your personality. I have used it or a variation of it for years. Adjust it so it fits you perfectly.

First talk about yourself in a way that a person reading your dating ad can relate to followed by your aspirations. Then connect what you started off with to your hobbies or business and goals. You should make your personal ad, at least, five paragraphs, ending with you hope to meet someone that fits your life as you do hers.

Now if you adjust that ad to suit your style and purpose, I think you will meet women. It is up to you after that, but as long as you are open and honest I feel you will do well. Just one more fine point, don’t invite a woman to hike in the woods on a first date. You will look like the Internet ax murderer if you do. Also, I have had women Google me for criminal records, so don’t think you are going to put one over on women, they have heard it all before and were a lot smarter than men.

Below is a copy of the Personal Ad I use


Internet dating is something I do not know if I will ever be prepared for; nonetheless, this is how it is done today which brings me to this site. The site seems like a great way for like people to meet. This profile may be lengthy, but I want you to know the real me as I wish to know the real you. Before you read this, know that I am a one-woman man and expect the same in my partner. I am also looking for a serious relationship, so if you only want to date... Move on now and save us both the trouble. Okay, so if you are still here, read on.

About me!
I am an intelligent man who comes with a level of sophistication that makes me capable of rising to any occasion. I have lived in Delaware for ten years after moving from a small New England coastal town (Maine) where I lived on an island. Sounds more glamorous than it was… I live alone and own my own successful business working from home. I have also published a business book that is available on Amazon. My job is as easy as it gets and often I find myself bored with the few challenges I get for the money I receive. Some people would say I am very lucky, but I know that for too long I have filled time by watching TV, playing around on the computer, and keeping myself busy working, instead of living a fulfilling life with a worthy partner. I have been alone for what seems the longest time, and I feel I truly need to change my path.

What to do, what to do
Most people enjoy the same activities I do, such as the outdoors/seashore excursions, bicycling, special get-a-ways to unfamiliar places, and nice people in groups. What I hope makes me different is that I also enjoy entertaining, parties, family togetherness, being with friends & debates as long as they are not hostile. I am naturally curious and love learning/discovering new things, ideas, and places.

Me as a potential life partner/boyfriend/husband
I believe I am a well-rounded person. Over the course of my life, I have been a mentor to a fatherless child, a volunteer at a homeless shelter (three years), a builder volunteer for Habitat for Humanity, a friend to the elderly and nature. I believe in giving back to my community and keep involved with charity organizations that support our country. I have small town values and have been raised to be worthy of respect while living with dignity and am a person of quality.

I am a romantic at heart and believe in relationships and the dedication a man and woman have to each other as partners. I seek a woman of quality for a one on one relationship that is both loving and sensual with commitment, sanctity, purpose, and a sense of adventure. I hope we both desire for a relationship that will last for the rest of our lives. Each committed to one another. I have come to POF [u]seeking a relationship[/u], with the hope that I will find love again with a woman that understands that the trust in a relationship must not be violated, as I do. My goal here is to be 1/2 of a happy couple. I hope that will come true.

Communication is important to me. Few things are more important than being able to speak freely, exchange ideas, and learn from ones' partner in life. I can easily look back at my life and tell you what I learned from my better half. Talking on the phone during courtship is highly rated for good reason. So it is important to me that my lady is one who isn't afraid to speak her mind or share ideas. Openness is a good thing.

I am more spiritual than religious. I attend church, at times, but do not belong to a major faith. I have the belief that God lives within us and through us. Truly we are all the creation of a master builder. I have read many spiritual books and the Bible. There is much good in spirituality, but religion seems to divide people.

My favorite verse from the Bible: "Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts always hopes, always perseveres."

The facts:
I am a father of two boys who are grown, on their own, serving our country in the military as physicians assistants; they are an everlasting part of my life. I am divorced for Twelve years, not in a relationship at present, gainfully employed, not rich or poor, and I am a reasonable person who happens to be seeking friend/partner in life. I have been told that I am fun, funny, witty, and charming. I hope that is to my credit because I am seeking a serious reply about finding a life partner who is compatible, friendly, decent, fun, and loving. I am a one-woman, man and seek a one-man, woman. If you care to talk to me and believe you are a woman that would appreciate the man described above, please email me.

As you now know, I am quite serious about finding the love of my life. If you are too, I have been waiting a long time to meet you. Take the first step and send me a note and I will respond.

If you need help, send me an email. Hub Pages would not allow me to publish the actual ad, but if you email me, I will send it to you.


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