- Gender and Relationships
Is marriage the final chapter to a happily ever after?
A cozy roadside café; a beautiful setting sun and a crowded city travelling through time! You’re sitting there, sipping your latte when a stranger catches your eye! He’s gorgeous and you fall in love with him in an instant. A courtship follows and you marry each other in six months. But tell me, “Is marriage the final chapter of a happily ever after?”
At some point in our lives, we rush through relationships and jump into marriage, considering it the ultimate episode of happiness. But do we always consider whether the time is appropriate? Some people consider marriage to be the final chapter of a relationship; the ultimate chapter of a happily ever after. But it is not so all the time.
A lasting relationship is never a cue to get married. Many couples withstand a lifetime without ever tying the knot whereas some courtships wither by tying the knot. Does that imply that we never get married? Not necessarily. It lies in the fact whether we are happy in our relationship and ready to take it a step further, or we just want to enjoy the moment as it is.
Many women in the South Asian region are forced to get married at the age of 18 or below with or without parental consent. In this part of the world it is thought that marriage is the ultimate destiny of a woman and getting married will bring her the stability and belongingness she always wanted. But a bond sealed by witnesses and paper can never bring happiness forever. What I’m trying to say is that we can find happiness in our own selves or in our partner. But that does not necessarily have to culminate in marriage, and even if it does, it is definitely not the final chapter. There are a million things between marriage and the end of the world.
So, what is the answer to a happily ever after then?
I would say it’s all in the moments. I once came across a quote in a book called The Alchemist saying, “Life is the moment we are living right now.” So, if you are happy with your partner at this moment, then this is your chapter of a happily ever after. Marriage does not always work for everyone and it’s perfectly alright if some marriages work out and some don’t. It can be said that marriage is one of the answers but certainly not ‘the answer’. So, be happy now and enjoy the time with yourself or your partner if you have one, and whatever happens next will be just another adventure.