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Journaling to Your Spouse

Updated on January 6, 2009

After you've been married for awhile and the honeymoon phase is over it is easy to fall into a routine, which can quickly become a rut. When you add children into the equation your chance to whisper sweet nothings into your significant other's ear become almost non existent. So how do your reestablish romantic communication?

One option is to buy a set of journals. (You might also want to purchase some nice writing pens or pencils.) Invest in a nice quality journal that you will enjoy using. My husband and I prefer using slim leather journals. However, even a couple of office notepads will work.

Once you have chosen your journals each of you should keep a journal with you. Then during one of those little moments during the day when you get a break take a moment to write a message to your spouse in the journal. It may seem strange to write those things that you are used to speaking to each other. However, you will find the romantic return makes the endeavor worth while.

After you've written a message leave the journal for your spouse at some predetermined location. (Bedside tables work well.) Then your spouse will know that your thoughts are with him or her. Over time you will find that journaling to each other can lead to a greater level of intimacy then you can easily find simply talking to each other.

Journaling has another advantage beyond the potential to increase your romantic utterances. Sometimes there are subjects that you or your spouse may have difficulty discussing, even with each other (or maybe particularly with each other).

In those instances journaling allows you a little distance to express your thoughts. You don't have to worry about being interrupted before you've completed your thought. Moreover, your spouse will have time to reflect on what you've written before writing his or her own response.

This type of communication gives a person time to process emotions and determine what he or she truly thinks and feels about what is being said. A gut reaction is often very different than a response that has been pondered and carefully worded in a journal. (Due to the more permanent nature of journals people tend to have a little more care about what is said then in spoken conversation.)

This type of journaling is more work. However, a life time bond isn't formed overnight and often requires work. Unlike in the movies a lasting loving relationship can not be formed in two hours.

Good luck with your journaling. I hope it proves as useful to you as it has to me and my husband.

A little romantic music for inspiration...


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    • Joy M profile image

      Joy M 8 years ago from Sumner, Washington

      I hadn't thought of that. It is an interesting idea--journalling to your future spouse.

    • Jane Grey profile image

      Ann Leavitt 8 years ago from Oregon

      This would also be a great idea for singles who are commited to living a pure life before they meet their future spouses: waiting faithfully and longing for the day when they are together. What a gift that would be on the wedding day!

    • Joy M profile image

      Joy M 8 years ago from Sumner, Washington

      My parents actually gave me the idea. They are the reason my husband and I tried it. I hope it works as well for you.

    • profile image

      Eddie Perkins 8 years ago

      Joy, This is a really neat idea.

      I’m listening to “A little romantic music for inspiration...” as I type.  I’m just wondering where the same three birds were going during the video.  :)

      This is an interesting idea though.  I believe it will work for Barbie and me.

      Thank you. ~ eddie

    • Joy M profile image

      Joy M 8 years ago from Sumner, Washington


    • justmesuzanne profile image

      justmesuzanne 8 years ago from Texas

      This is a good idea. I'm sure it will catch on with a lot of people! :)