Judging People By Their Appearance: I Am Guilty: How Do Others Judge Me?
Do You Judge Others?
Do You Think You Are Judgemental?
Most of us would not like to think of ourselves as judgmental people. We most certainly don't enjoy it when other people judge us or make comments about us that we don't appreciate. Judging people can lead to stereotypes, rumors, and ultimately hate. For some people, even receiving constructive criticism can tamper their ego.
As much as I hate to admit it, I find that I can often be judgmental towards others. Usually, my judgments are either in my head and kept silent or just shared with a few within earshot. Say, when driving in my car with my wife and children. Perhaps that is the worst scenario.
The worst part about my judging others is that it's usually really stupid comments that I make. I might see a lady walking down the street and her outfit doesn't fit or maybe it's just tacky. What is the point of me saying these things? I don't know her. She never did anything to me. Maybe she likes her style. Perhaps she makes her own clothing. Either way, what gives me the right to feel that I can judge people?
Sometimes I judge people on physical appearance. This has got to be the worst way to judge people. First of all, in most cases, people are born with their looks. If you think about it, a human being is God's art. We are only different than flowers, trees, and animals because humans are more special. God has given us the ability to use many gifts that no other creation has the ability to use. Language, writing, speech, emotions are some of the gifts we have been given. So if I judge somebody, am I actually judging God's work?
As I sit and think about writing this hub, I'm trying to find the underlying reasons that I can be so judgmental. Well, growing up my parents didn't judge me. My parents were awesome when I was growing up and still are today. I never had a need or want. So no, I don't think my parents created a judgmental person.
I do have another relative, however, that is a bit older and I choose not to mention his status in the family hierarchy. Every Saturday we have dinner at my mother’s house. There is usually anywhere from 15 to 20 family members and friends that join us. Sometimes after dinner we all sit and watch TV together. That's when the judging begins!
We often watch the show "COPS" as it comes on Saturday nights in our area. This unnamed person has a comment for every single person that gets arrested. He even makes fun of the cops! “Look at that nose!” or, “Look at how fat that guys is!” This is often most of the conversation that takes place during these family television viewing episodes.
And so it hit me. I think I know where I got my judgmental attitude from. It's funny too, because each time I see him doing this, I often think gee, he has a comment for everyone! Now when I listen to myself, I have become the same person.
Essays by J.S.Matthew
- The Cycle of Depression: A Narrative
- Reading At Home: Most Important Homework
- A Healthy Mind and Body
- Pedestrians: An Essay on Etiquette
- Living In Peace...
- There's Nowhere For Our Kids To Play
- Respect In The House: A Short Essay For Children
- A Critique of My Own Critisism
- The Cycle of Depression: A Narrative
It doesn't matter where I am or who I'm with. Even if I don't say it out loud, I am still thinking bad thoughts about people. I find that I often judge celebrities. Maybe I am jealous of their success? I think that this makes me shallow. But I'm human and since I realize my problem, I think that I could fix it.
I realize that usually when someone is bullying or picking on another person, it is because of their own insecurities. I know that that's the case in my situation. I'm sure that everybody has things that they don't like about themselves, whether it is their appearance, part of a personality, or many other aspects of self.
Personally I don't like the idea that I'm very short for man. I was often teased in school because of my height. I'm also not as muscular as I would like to be and I have to admit, I'm a little chubby. When I was in middle school I remember some of my fellow classmates making fun of my nose telling me that it was large. Maybe I became judgmental because I was judged. Maybe it makes me feel better to make fun of other people. Whatever the reason, I want to change.
I will need to try to think of positive things about people instead of thinking negative. Maybe thinking about their background or their life situation, and realize how good my own situation is. I have to also realize that these people a part of God's family. God created them because he wanted to. I have no right to judge others as I will be judged someday by a Higher Power.
So, I know I won't be perfect, but from now on I would really like to try to be nicer to people both in my words and my thoughts. I started thinking about this recently because of all the awesome comments I have received on HubPages. All of these people who I do not know personally have wonderful and beautiful things to say to me, based on things that I have said and published in my hubs. This is what has made me decide to become a better person.
I want to start to view life as I view HubPages. I would rather judge people by what they say and do as opposed to judging them just on their looks. HubPages has been a wonderful experience for me to really perform an inventory of myself so that I can change the things that I think need changing. Fixing the Judgmental Person that I Became was the first thing on the top of my list! Now I have to Keep Moving Forward, All the Time!
© 2011 JS Matthew