Key Elements of Successful Relationships ( Part 1)
Relationships are what define us as humans. It is the glue that holds us together as a society. There are different types of relationships. We share relationships with our parents, children, life partners, friends, siblings, and colleagues. We have different expectations from the various people in our lives. The dynamics of each of these relationships are different as well. But one thing remains common. There are some key elements that define the success of your relationships. In this article, I will be talking about the two most important elements, trust and honesty.
Every successful relationship is built on the foundation of trust.
We are taught from a young age to not trust people easily. And in the present world, it is really important to be careful with people. Since everyone's defense systems are on high alert, it takes a long time to build trust. The problem is that people want everyone to trust them immediately, while they don't trust others.
Our relationships have a deep impact on us. The actions of people who are close to us, directly affects how we feel. We are worried that if we don't keep a constant check, they might do something that will hurt our feelings. So to protect our feelings, we compromise on trusting them completely.
I would like to stress on the importance of trust in these relationships. Parents believe that their children are not mature enough to make sound decisions. They also feel that children can't distinguish properly between good and bad. So they don't trust their children. Their intentions might be pure and out of concern for the child's well being.
But distrust is harmful to the relationship in the long run. In fact, children get better at lying and won't feel comfortable about telling important things to their parents. On the other hand, trusting them completely will put a certain amount of responsibility on them. They will think twice before doing something wrong due to the guilt of breaking your trust.
Respect for one's personal space is one of the key elements of trust. We see cases where partners have access to each other's social media accounts. Parents do the same with their children sometimes. While the intentions might be different, the result is the same. It is a breach of one's private space. This usually happens due to a lack of trust.
Constant vigilance and keeping track of a person's activities is just a temporary fix. Building trust is the permanent solution. If you trust the person, there will be no need to keep a track of what they are doing. In some cases, there might be some parts of their personality which they are not comfortable with sharing. You need to respect that, regardless of how close our relationship with them is.
You need to put in the efforts to build trust. Be vocal about the fact that you trust them. Let them know that you only have their best interests in mind. It might take a lot of time and effort but it will be worth it.
In my opinion, honesty in a relationship is non-negotiable. But this is one of the most overlooked aspects.
We tend to prefer people who speak sweet lies instead of the bitter truth. People think that it is okay to lie as long as it doesn't harm anyone. But the truth is, you are harming your relationship with the person. By lying, you are pretending to be someone who you are not. The person forms an image and impression of you that is not completely true.
The main reason people lie is out of fear. They are scared to face the truth. They are scared of how the listener might react. Sometimes, they feel that the other person is emotionally incapable of handling the truth. They assume that they're protecting them from truth. But the fact is, it is impossible to have a successful relationship with someone who can't handle the truth.
For example, a husband lies to his wife because he doesn't want to hurt her feelings. But when the wife finds out on her own, it can be devastating to the relationship.
One needs to learn the art of diplomacy. Even the harshest truth can be put across in a delicate way. It is important however, to ensure that the complete truth is delivered. Most of the time, the truth will be unpleasant to both the speaker and the listener. It might lead to disagreements or problems in the short term. But in the long run, honesty is the best approach.
Honesty and trust in a relationship are inter connected. One cannot exist without the other. And in my opinion, without these two elements, a healthy relationship cannot exist.
- Key Elements of a Successful Relationship (Part 2)
In my previous article, I spoke about the importance of trust and honesty. I believe that these two values are the bedrock of every relationship. However, There are a few more elements you need to work on, to strengthen your bond with people.
- Key Elements of a Successful Relationship (Part 3)
In my previous article, I spoke about five elements. They are - paying attention, the gift of time, efforts, problem solving and the value of a relationship. In this article, I will be covering four more important elements. I hope you find this usefu
- Key Elements of a Successful Relationship (Part 4)
In the last article in this four part series, let's look at some more key elements of successful relationships.