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ABUSE, Yes or No

Updated on November 28, 2014

What are the signs

Sometimes we can't tell the signs of abuse especially when that person seems to be the life of the party, seems to adore everything about you, and oh yeah, everybody loves him or her. I say him or her because abuse is something that comes in all cultures, all ethnicities, all ages and all sizes and shapes. This person seems to give you all their undivided attention. This feels great when you are in love and have absolutely nothing else in this life to do such as school, work, etc., but what happens when you have to leave? Is that person angry that you want to spend to with your family or friends. Does that person want you to feel bad that you have a life outside of them. These are signs you should watch for.

Stalker or nah

Is he or she stalking you? Do you notice that this person is showing up where he or she hadn't been invited and chimes in as though you invited that person there? Are they really sensitive about the subject when you ask what they are doing there? If that person tends to get angry and begin blaming you for their mistakes or for things they have done, please be aware that this person is almost certainly an abuser. He or she wants you to feel bad about the situation and feel sympathetic about their craziness. Sooner or later that stalking becomes obsession which sooner or later turns into abuse.

When the abuse begins

When you find yourself covering a bruise or making excuses for that darkness around your eyes, you realize that you have entered abuse. This person can be the sweetest person in the world but then something happens. It could be something major like the loss of a job or death of a loved one or something as small as changing the channel when he happens to fall asleep. What ever issue you find yourself in, you notice how they find a reason to blame you for the sun not shining. It may sound comical but there are those who fee l the need to lash out at others because of their insecurities about themselves. No matter how you try to encourage them, you at that time are the enemy. So, don't try to be the hero, get out as soon as you can.

Living with an abuser

Should someone feel justified in slapping, hitting, kicking and throwing things at a spouse, girlfriend, boyfriend or significant other because they said something they didn't like.

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Know When to Leave

We often talk about abuse and being a survivor of abuse, it's hard to get away from the abuser. But for the safety and healing of yourself and your children, get out!!!! No amount of money, love or fame is worth the humiliation you feel, the hurt and pain you and your children feel and the scars you will take with you after it is all over. I pray that any person reading this that knows someone in this situation, do all you can to assure them that you are there with them through thick and thin.


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