Ladies Rescue Yourself
The Stress Caused Raising Children in Poverty
Let me first stress that life can bring about some unpleasant situations. No one can help what they are born into but duplication of negative environments and poor life choices leading to negative outcomes is a choice. There has to be something inside of you that believes you can have better and do better for you and your next generation. Today is the day you make a choice to achieve. Achieve not based on meeting someone to rescue you but making wise decisions, choosing to invest in yourself through knowledge and ending the partaking in destructive patterns. If no one ever told you this – you don’t have to be poor. Your children do not have to be raised in high stress environments that jeopardize their life and wellbeing.
Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs
What are the obstacles presented to children when they are raised in poverty?
- Basic needs are constantly in jeopardy. To grow up hungry not having enough food or not knowing where the next meal will come from is disturbing to stay the least. According to nokidhungry approximately 13 million children in America are not receiving the proper amount of food. American Psychological Association reported that single-mother based households prevalent among African American and Hispanic families contributes to disparities in poverty.
THE APA REPORTS THE EFFECTS OF POVERTY
- Poverty is linked with negative conditions such as substandard housing, homelessness, inadequate nutrition and food insecurity, inadequate child care, lack of access to health care, unsafe neighborhoods, and under-resourced schools which adversely impact our nation’s children.
- Poorer children and teens are also at greater risk for several negative outcomes such as poor academic achievement, school dropout, abuse and neglect, behavioral and socioemotional problems, physical health problems, and developmental delays.
- These effects are compounded by the barriers children and their families encounter when trying to access physical and mental health care.
- Economists estimate that child poverty costs an estimated $500 billion a year to the U.S. economy; reduces productivity and economic output by 1.3 percent of GDP; raises crime and increases health expenditure (Holzer et al., 2008).
Human nature includes the instinct to survive. You are not going to sit back and watch others have the stability you desire and continue to go without.
2PAC said it best – “My stomach hurts, so I’m looking for a purse to snatch.”
Curtis Carroll – “Being illiterate is like being in a bubble. Being uneducated affects the way people move in life, it affects what they become in life.”
To eat or have stability one will be drawn to commit petty crimes in order to get money for rent, the lights, or to put food on the table for your family. Crime that introduces young people to the criminal justice system in a way that will scar them for the rest of their lives, even for non-violent offenses.
What’s it like to sit in the dark at night because you have no lights?
What’s it like to wonder everyday if you’re going to be evicted while you’re in school pretending everything is ok at home?
What’s it like to have men come in and out your home that don’t care about you that sleep with your mother and give her money or help on occasion?
What’s it like to never experience a peaceful neighborhood, growing up with gang violence and drugs?
What’s it like to be surrounded by criminals where it appears the only way to have something is by poisoning the community by selling drugs?
What’s it like for all your brothers and sisters to have different fathers, some perhaps more involved in their life than yours?
What’s it like to constantly witness your parent stressed day in and day out perhaps using alcohol or drugs to cope?
What’s it like for mommy’s latest boyfriend to mistreat you because their tolerating you just to sleep with your mother?
What’s it like to be abused, mistreated, or molested and keep quiet because this man is helping your mom financially?
Stop. I see this epidemic of women believing someone is going to come along and buy them coach bags, red bottoms, buy them vehicles, they’ll never have to work -just look good and someone will take you and your kids in and provide for you. While there are some men that enjoy this traditional arrangement, not all men have good intentions with this setup. Have you ever thought a man moved only by shallow needs doesn’t make for the most loving, faithful, respectful man? Have you ever thought there are predators looking specifically for women with no resources, limited income/education, and kids so they can abuse you and your children? While this is not every man’s intent beware, there are men not looking at you but your daughters and sons to abuse. YES, little boys are being molested as well as little girls.
STOP / STOP / STOP Accepting media propaganda that you have to be an Instagram model, on the pole, or a housewife of whatever. This is real life. Don’t play the 1 in 250,000 game / play the 1 in 5 odds for you bread and butter. Please research the CDC statistics to understand why thinking you’ll sleep your way into financial success and money is not a good risk to take. How you make your money does count, don’t let people make you believe otherwise.
According to The Allstate Foundation Purple Purse 99% of all domestic violence cases, financial abuse helps keep victims trapped in the abusive relationship.
Dress - Your Presentation/Brand Without Words
Instead of being jealous of others achievements make the decision to change your behavior. If you look around you in your community and everyone is losing, determine in your life that you will do better not only for yourself but for your future generation. Party time is over. Drinking, excessive fornication to take your mind off of your bad circumstances, and taking drugs needs to stop. If you have kids, turn off the TV and study together at the table to improve your circumstances. Today, there is YouTube and the library. If you can’t afford a formal education NO ONE can stop you from gaining knowledge. Let’s be honest, how many CEO’s and financially stable people are walking around with red, green, and purple hair barely able to speak proper English that walk around half naked? How many successful people have a rap sheet 3-4 pages long because they can’t control their temper and want to express their frustration fighting with everyone? How many mean-spirited, rude, ignorant people are living happy, financially secure, with great SPOUSES? Not being judgmental but making changes means having the courage to act and think differently. For the same outcome, simply repeat the same behaviors and nothing will change in your life. Nothing will change for you and nothing will change for your next generation.
Nielsen ratings reported African American’s watch more television than any other group. -The Root(2013)
Success Is Possible
- How 3 Entrepreneurs Went from Welfare to Multi-Million Business in Five Years
The CEO of Zaycon Fresh shares the entrepreneurial lessons he learned from taking his circumstances and turning them into a major business opportunity.
From Abuse to Success
How To Change Your Life
1. Decide you can win.
2. Create an action plan to be successful.
3. Decide to sacrifice the next 1-5 years to have a better future.
4. Stop believing someone will rescue you from taking responsibility for you and your children.
5. Stop looking for fast money, compromising your soul and your children’s well-being.
6. Invest in yourself. Read books, watch YouTube, study tools of success and seek guidance from successful people.
7. Pursue a life that will not only make you financially stable but proud of who you are in life. Choose to be an example for your children of how to take control of your life.
Determine that you and your children (in existence or in the future) can have a better life. Determine to make the sacrifices today for success tomorrow. No watching endless hours of tv, gossiping on the phone, hanging out at the bar, gossiping on the phone, or going to the club. Decide to take a time out for the next 1-5 years. Remember-time passes regardless so you might as well make it count. Remember if you go hard and make sacrifices today your future life will be so much easier. You don’t have to struggle. You don’t have to be poor. You don’t have to prostitute yourself to “get by” and any man that wants you to be nothing so he can shine question his level and value for you if that’s what he wants. Do your research on what careers are in demand and are in line with your goals and economic needs. Remember you don’t always have to pursue a formal education, debt, to be successful. What’s sad is that some people can add up the money they spent on hair, partying, and getting their nails done which would be equivalent to obtaining a real-estate license or starting a notary business, etc. Invest in yourself. Start by researching people that made their fortune from humble beginnings. Study how they carry themselves, surround yourself with others focused on moving forward, people that are more successful than you. Everyone loves to teach someone what they’ve learned if they have a willing student. Changing your circle of friends will help you not to be distracted. Experience different environments, stay away from low-functioning environments and start being comfortable with being uncomfortable so you can grow.