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Ladies- What It Means When A Guy Says: "I'll call you" And Then...He Doesn't

Updated on November 22, 2011

Now, barring any reasons such as a family tragedy or any other personal situation that may prevent a guy from calling, a guy may not call because...

#1. They just may not be that into you. I know this may hard to hear, and many women may not want to accept this as fact. But what you must realize, is that you can't attract everyone- and get guys to like/fall for you 100% of the time. There may be nothing wrong with you in particular- but the chemistry from their point of view just isn't there. By saying they'll call you, is just their way of being nice- and attempting to gracefully exit out of that situation as smoothly and/or quickly as possible.

#2. Work is on the forefront of their mind. It's possible the man is just too busy. I've had numerous guys (and women also) who've come to me looking to be matched up through my matchmaking service for the sole reason that they just didn't have the time to meet or socialize with people. Their work day is so busy and hectic, they just crash out at the end of the day- and just want to sleep. Now I do have to say if a man truly is into you, he'll find a way to call regardless of his work schedule. But if he's on the fence (or just plainly not into you), he'll most likely not call- or not call you that often.

#3. Someone else has come into the picture. That person may be an ex, or someone new whom they find more interesting. If they feel a better connection with that person, they may be willing to just forget about attempting to see/talk to you further- and they'll work on building (or re-building) something with the other person. In this situation it's very unfortunate... but it happens.

Even though many girls (and guys also) may hear the words "I'll call you", and truly hope that person calls, they can reduce any feelings of sadness, depression, and/or disappointment if the person doesn't- by learning to read body language better (their non-verbal cues), and truly listen to HOW the person is talking when they're conversing with you. Do they seem interested? Do they seem bored? Are they truly engaged in a conversation with you? All of this you have to consider when you're on a date with a man.


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    • loveguru23 profile image

      Daniel Amis 4 years ago from Queens, NY

      Hi Laurel. Well I think honesty is the best policy. This is something that the previous commenter touched on. In my opinion you're only hurting him more by leading him on- and making him think that everything is o.k. Let him know how you truly feel, wish him the best, and move on from the situation. If there's no connection... there's no connection. You shouldn't feel bad for ending things no matter how good/nice of a guy he is. He'll find someone that's right for him... and so will you.

      Thank you for reading the article and providing your comment!

    • profile image

      Laurel 4 years ago

      I find myself in this situation of not knowing wether or not i should say to a guy that i'm not into him, because i care enough to not want to hurt his feelings..

    • loveguru23 profile image

      Daniel Amis 6 years ago from Queens, NY

      Thank you for your positive words Kashana! And I do agree a man (and even some women) should be honest if there's no interest there. But unfortunately in some cases that does not happen.

      And I believe your opinion on the matter does count- because I'm sure there will be a few guys that'll choose to read this article- and they'll see what you and any other woman that chooses to comment will say, and make some changes to themselves- by being more honest in those situations.

      Thanks again for your comments!

    • kashana1985 profile image

      kashana1985 6 years ago from Minneapolis

      I really like your hub and find it interesting and factual, however I do feel like a man should be honest in every situation when dealing with a women. Unfortunately all women cannot handle the truth but if a man is not vibing with a women for whatever reason he should not make the invite to call her, just be casual and leave it at that. Its not like my opinion on the fact matters but I just wanted to share that with you.