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Let's Talk About Online Dating!

Updated on February 9, 2016

1. Take A Look At Your Profile.

Whether you've paid for a subscription on or you've decided to give Tinder a whirl, your profile speaks volumes. Your profile picture is the first thing a person sees and whether we like it or not, people make snap judgements. No matter what your profile Bio says, your pictures say it louder. I'm inclined to believe that less is more. Stay classy. And this goes for both guys and girls.

Your pictures should be attractive and complimenting, but exposing too much skin instantly makes you look desperate. Don't display yourself like a product on the market by showing every detail. You give yourself more value when dressing tastefully modest. It cheapens your body when you put it all out there for anyone to see. That hot guy/girl may see your pictures, but that creep with a fake profile just may be looking too.

And absolutely don't put pictures on your dating site featuring other people and certainly not your past flames. I have seen this too many times.

2. Starting Conversations.

When messaging someone of interest, say more than "hey". This is almost always the beginning of the end. That is the start of a boring and awkward conversation that won't tell you anything about a person. A lot of "hey" messages get ignored even. Look at their profile and find something to ask them about. Example: "Hey, I saw that you play guitar. I love guitar! How long have you been playing?"

Maybe open the conversation with a topic that is fun. Something that everyone likes to talk about. Example: " Ready, set, go! Tell me your top 5 favorite movies! :)" And don't lie about what you like just to have things in common. That could catch up with you if you date later on. You may find yourself watching and re-watching Star Wars episodes with a fake smile.

3. Don't Rush.

Don't rush into meeting someone too soon. It is true that you can't completely know if you're interested in a person until you meet face to face. (A lot can stay hidden online) You shouldn't drag it out too long, but meeting too soon can be a waste of time. You should have a mental list (Or go ahead and write it out) of what you desire/need in a person and questions to ask. Many times you can eliminate awkward dates by asking the right questions before agreeing to meet.

I also recommend talking on the phone. You can learn so much about a person that way. The tone of their voice, how they laugh, and if they're a good conversationalist offline. Talking on the phone before a date can also give you a feeling of familiarity and make a date feel more relaxed and comfortable.

4. Know What You Want.

You definitely need to be honest about what you're wanting. You need to know if you're willing to move to another state, date someone in the army, someone who's an atheist/religious, etc. You need to let people know upfront if you're looking for something casual or serious.

It's tempting to carry conversations with interesting people even if you know it won't lead anywhere. Be considerate and careful about leading people on. Don't talk to that sleek city boy if you're a die-hard country girl. Don't start things you know you're going to have to end. That's not fair for anybody. Remember that these people are real and looking for love too. Don't make it harder for them.

5. First Date.

Keep this as simple as possible. Nothing elaborate or expensive. I would advise staying away from dinner. Meet at a coffee shop or somewhere with a common interest, like a music or book store. Somewhere you can look around and take pressure off conversation. Always stay safe and keep first meetings in a public place. Don't stress out too much. If they're the right person than they will like you even if you're nervous or awkward at first. And remember to have fun!


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    • dashingscorpio profile image

      dashingscorpio 23 months ago

      Great advice!

      It should also be noted to use good commonsense when dealing with strangers both online and offline. :)

      Online dating is nothing more than a (tool) for meeting new people. Just as a fork is a tool for eating.

      However you will never hear of an obese person blame their weight gain on their fork!

      And yet many folks will blame their bad dating experiences on the online dating industry!

      Each of us gets to (choose) our own friends, lovers, and spouse.

      You're responsible for creating your own screening process.

      Know what you want and choose wisely!