- Gender and Relationships
Letters to My Friend
I see the pain buried inside the depths of your heart and soul. I know it seems as though life is not making any sense, but you are more okay than you realize.
Search within the caverns of your soul. You have more strength than in your finger than most people have in their whole bodies. I hope you will read these words and understand.
The pain is deeper than any raging river, but guess what? You will heal, in due time.
I know your sister was like a best friend to you and you never thought the day would come when you would lose her. She was everything to you. The birds in the sky, the darkness before the dawn, and the moon in the night sky.
She probably was your only friend, but do you know the best part about her being your only friend? She wants the best for you. She doesn't want you to cry your eyes out every night over her. Losing sleep is not the best thing she wants for you.
She wants to know you'll be okay without her. Because guess what? She is much closer than you think.
Call out to her and she will hear you. She will come and sit next to you. You probably won't see her, but allow yourself to feel her right beside you.
When you feel a slight breeze on your hand, it will be her. When you feel a slight tug on your shoulder, it will be her. Don't you see? She is never too far.
Dry your eyes and realize the world is waiting for you. You probably already know that because you woke today from your deep slumber. Some days you want to sleep and some days you don't, and that is okay.
Some days you feel on top of the world and other days, you don't and that is okay. Your heart has been torn, but you will be just fine.
Remember when I said, "You're stronger than you realize"?
That is because you are. You have your moments when you don't want to face the world, but you get up and you face the world anyway. You are a conqueror and you're strong.
You probably think I don't understand and I'm just saying these words because we're friends. I'm not just saying this. See, I was in your predicament six years ago and I had no one who understood my pain.
I lost my sister, too. I thought my world had ended and that the universe was punishing me for a crime I committed. If I knew my sister was going to die, I wouldn't have been mean to her. I wouldn't have said I hated her and I wish she wasn't born.
See, I know you didn't hate your sister and you are probably wishing you hadn't done what I've done too, but that's life. People always say mean things when they're scared, hurt or angry. I know she meant the world to you and you didn't want her to die.
My friend, death will always come and it will come unexpectedly.
So don't cry about all the things you did or didn't do. Remember all the good times you had. If you believe in heaven, then you know one day, you will see her again.
Until then, take all your memories and wear them on you like a badge of courage. Your sister is watching and she is counting on you to live the best life ever. She is awaiting your arrival into heaven. She can't wait to hear about all the adventures you'll have and tell you about her adventures with God.
Take my hand and we can get started working on those adventures.
I love you and you're my dearest friend. You will get through this.