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Will Long Distance Relationships Work

Updated on June 30, 2008

Long Distance Relationships

Long distance relationships can be hard. I mean, you're living in one city and your loved one in another. I've been in a long distance relationship, and it's not fun by any means.

For the better part of 2007, my beau was either in another city, hours away, or on "vacation." We spent very little time together, except for phone calls, letters, and such. But, we were able to make it through. The hardest part, is being a part.

For many people, being a part from your loved one, makes the heart grow stronger and fonder.

Views of Distance

How you deal with being a part from your loved one depends solely on how you feel about the separation.

If you were brought up in a family where absence of a parent or loved one was normal, then time apart may not be that big of a deal for you. But, if your parents were always with each other when you were living at home, you may not understand the idea of the temporary time apart.

If in the past you have had someone you care about say that they would be gone temporarily but never returned; you may see the separation as the beginning of the end.

Love is an idea, thought, or emotion that is both physical and mental, if the love is strong enough, the separation should not be a threat to your emotional security. If you look at the separation as a temporary phase; it may be easier to cope with versus looking at it in a long term view.

Use Online Chats to Keep in Touch

Away From Home

If you are the one who is leaving, you may see the advantages as more important for the time being and as a means to make the future better. You'll get to see new places, new people, and maybe a new job opportunity. But, the disadvantages are just as important to your relationship; you'll be missing your home, friends, and family. You'll have to deal with the loneliness of not having your loved one with you.

If you are the one who's staying at home, you have the advantage of familiar surroundings and the support from friends and family. But, you may see that you were abandoned. This will be a time for new experiences; change up the every day life a little. The more you get on your feet and go, the less you'll be thinking about the separation.

Text Message During the Day

Make it work

The key to long distance relationships is to talk- be honesty and open about how you feel. Try not to fall into a trap of pretending its ok while you hide the loneliness and fear or letting the resentment slip out. Make sure to be open minded at the change because you aren't the only one that's having to cope, your loved one is too.

Make sure to be honest.

Make sure that your share your feelings about the separation and distance- pros and cons. You will be able to support and reassure you and your partner that the relationship will last through this rough spot.

Make sure to keep the communication going.

Stay in touch regularly. This is definitely the most important key to any long distance relationship.

Consider:

  • Email, telephone, text messages, letters, video conferences, etc.
  • Send little gifts that remind you of your loved one.
  • Make surprise calls just to say "I love you."
  • Send pictures by mail and email. Consider videos and webcams, as well.

Seeing Your Partner After Prolonged Periods

When you finally get to spend time together after a long separation, more than likely you both have built up expectations and anxiety. Just remember that the reality does not always match the idea, so try not to get disappointed when things don't end up exactly as you had hoped.

Comments

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    • Rismayanti profile image

      Rismayanti 

      8 years ago from Tropical Island

      Love it.. thanks for share, will follow you

    • Redonfire profile image

      Redonfire 

      8 years ago from Montreal, Canada

      enjoyed reading your hub. Being a part from your loved one does makes the heart grow fonder, but stronger I'm not yet sure.

    • privateye2500 profile image

      privateye2500 

      8 years ago from Canada, USA, London

      In my personal experience and those of people I know personally - the anser is NO.

      Absence makes the heart grow fonder alright--for somebody ELSE! On Both sides eventually.

      Lonely is lonely like a fact is a fact.

    • Miss Match profile image

      Miss Match 

      9 years ago

      Did I mention..great hub:)

    • Miss Match profile image

      Miss Match 

      9 years ago

      Been there done that, wearing the long distance realationship for 10 years now...spainning 3 continents in the last 10 years, my secret to sucess...communication, commuincation,communication, trust. Having met and fallen in love before begining the long distance realtionship also helped create a strong foundation to build on. ..but despite our critics...we both beleive it can work, that and you just have to want it to work!

    • capalynn profile image

      capalynn 

      10 years ago from Roseville, CA

      This was really helpful for me and inspiring as well. The most difficult part for me right now in my current situation is the unknown and when we will see each other again. We are both patient, which is great. We are also both missing each other a lot and using every method we can to be in touch.

      thank you.

    • hassam profile image

      hassam 

      10 years ago from Pakistan

      Nice hub Whitney.........I also had a relationship which ended only in a week when i travelled away from her country........too bad long distance relationships dont last longer

    • premsingh profile image

      premsingh 

      10 years ago

      Long distance relationships are stronger than the short distance ones. However, thrills and excitements are ofen missing in these relationships if you havenever have chnace to meet each other. About hub -nice and sweet hub.

    • YoJDawg profile image

      YoJDawg 

      10 years ago from Arroyo Grande

      you are a Hub Goddess, you hub all the time, i wish i could, anyways, good hub, im in a long distance and its not always fun

    • MrMarmalade profile image

      MrMarmalade 

      10 years ago from Sydney

      An excellent hub

      thank you

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