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My Long Distance Relationship: Worth it?

Updated on March 20, 2016

If I were to go back in time and tell myself that "you will be in a long distance relationship someday", my 13 year old self would say "Nah Liz, that is too much work and the guy would have to be pretty special to put yourself through that."

Well here I am 2016, a few years later and in a long distance relationship. Let me begin by giving the back story to this tale.

It all started my junior year of high school. I honestly did not know a lot of the guy but besides that he played trombone with me in the band. We were just friend, but not close in anyway. So prom comes along and being the high school girl that I am, wanted to have a date for the event. My friend found her date, so I went looking for mine. I decided to pick the kid who played trombone because I knew him and suggested that it would go as friends. He agreed and asked me to our junior prom. After that, we did not really talk and went about our lives. Then senior year rolled in and he and I talked a lot during marching band season. Afterwards, we just started to like each other and thus, became a couple. We even went to our senior prom together, which I thought was pretty funny how I ended up going to both of my proms with the exact same guy.

Now the end of our senior year comes along, which was a bitter-sweet time in my life. I was excited to start college and a new chapter in my life, but not so excited to be leaving home and my boyfriend. Even before we started dating, I was going to go to college on the west coast and he, at the time, was planning to do community college. When I accepted my school, I figured I could not easily change my acceptance so I just stuck with going to the out-of-state school.

So it ended up that I would go to a college on the west coast and he would go to an in-state college. We ended up over 1,000 miles, over 16 hours by car, and one hour time difference apart from each other. It all started in June and has continued since. I would have never guessed that I would end up in a long distance relationship, but I guess people change.

Now would I recommend being in a long distance relationship? No, not really. Why not? Because it is not easy and creates so many problems. There have been several times, where I was close to ending the relationship, but ended up getting through the tough times.

Long distance relationships are not something to take lightly. They are a pain in the ass. I give so much credit to those who are in long distance relationships and in situations such as the military where the person is away for over a half a year or more. Being in this type of relationship sucks. You cannot physically touch the person, cannot always talk with them, and it basically feels like you are single, but cannot do things that single people can do, which is confusing and weird. There is also a lot of trust, honesty, and communication that goes into this type of relationship sometimes more so than the non-long-distance relationship.

So why do we put ourselves through this? Why not just end it there and move on? My answer: I have no freaking clue but we sometimes just do. In my case, we kind of started our long distance relationship faster than normal because we were not even in the same state for long periods of time over the summer. So it was kind of practice for the real deal when his school started in August (mine started in September). On top of beginning the college career, our long distance relationship was (and still is) not easy. But we manage and once you give it a try for a few months, you get use to it. It takes awhile to figure out a "schedule" such as when to text or call (because your schedules will not always be alined with each others perfectly). Unlike some couples, we do not Skype a whole lot, we try once every Sunday but sometimes that just does not work out. So it is a challenge.

Now there is a light to this darkness. Amazingly, we have stayed together and have worked on our relationship a lot. Some people believe that God gives us tests in life and I believe that long distance relationships are one of those major tests. You learn a lot about your partner and about yourself. Communication is key but also trust and being open-minded are other factors that develop more over time. I have to say that even though it sucks being in a long distance relationship, I am glad that I got to experience it and have definitely earned a lot from it.

Now skip forward to a year and a few months and he and I are still together. Long distance relationships is not for everyone, but it is possible to have a successful relationship, if you ever so choose to go for it. The road is bumpy and uncertain, but the reward of being able to finally physically hug the person after so many months of skyping, texting, and calling, is a pretty awesome feeling that makes it all worth it in the end.


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