Deciding where to live in Long Distance Relationships and how to survive in them and make them work with compromise
Long distance relationships how to survive
When i first met my wife we lived over 100 miles apart from each other. In fact when we first started dating we used to both travel and meet half way rather than one of us having to travel a long distance.When you first start a relationship you get carried away with the great feelings you get when love is blossoming and you put any complications there might be to the back of your mind and saviour the time your having.A new partner is a new beginning its a chance to learn from past mistakes and put all your energy and enthusiasm into your new relationship.After a while you realise you really like the person and start to get the feeling there might be a little more to the relationship than just dating and you start to think.
You both start to think about the 100 miles between you.
Can this long distance relationship work?
What if i move where she lives?Ive got my kids here to consider and my job
What if she moves? She has her kids and job to consider
But we love each other so much!!
Our friends and family say"wouldn't it be easier to find someone nearer too you"
Well yes there are many things to consider with a long distant relationship and sometimes there has to be compromise.If you are both prepared to compromise then that shows the love is strong enough between you to make the relationship work even though it is long distance.
I remember saying to my wife many a time that i would travel as far as i had to see her and she used to say the same. A long distant relationship can and will work if you want it too.
It wasnt possible at the start of the relationship for us too see each other everyday like alot of couples can but that just made it more exciting on the days we was going to see each other.We are all very fortunate we live in a world now where it is so easy to keep in touch via text and phone and also amazingly being able to see each on cam and communicate,although seeing the one you love on cam is quite hard if your really missing them as you get that feeling of so near yet so far.But this technology is great when it comes to long distance relationship survival.
But as things worked out our love and relationship developed and we worked out what we could do so we could see each other as much as possible and let me tell you long distance should not even be a consideration if you as a couple are right for each other,after all what rule says that the love of your life lives round the corner from you.
Well now we are married and couldnt be happier even though we still have long distance between us but our relationship is stronger than ever.
Let me explain.We decided it was best that i move to my wifes location,even though i still work 100 miles away.I am very fortunate to have a very understanding boss who has allowed me to work 4 days a week doing 10 hour shifts giving me 3 days with my wife.On my fifth day im working on a new project to enable me to work nearer my wife so we can be together more often. But the love we have for each other allows this arrangement work.
Now i realise 100 miles or 2hours in time is not a long distance unlike people having long distance relationships in different countrys but the same applies if the love is there then follow your heart and go for it.
The further the distance the more complications there are to think about but you can always keep in touch and if the love is strong and your both prepared to compromise then anything is possible in the development of your relationship.
Oh and if your wondering.... My wife and stepson were prepared to move to be nearer my work but it was more sensible for me too move in with her, but it was the fact that i knew she would uproot and move away to be with me gave me the confidence in her commitment to me.
long distant relationships
Keeping in touch is easy
Long Distance Relationships Tips and Advice
To survive a long distance relationship the following pieces of advice are worth considering.
- When starting a long distant relationship it is always worth discussing if you can both cope with what lies ahead of course we cant help who we fall in love with but at an early stage this advice is very practical and could save you alot of heartache in the future
- It is most important in a long distant relationship to make sure you keep in regular contact and communicate regular just a simple i love you text in the morning can brighten ones day.Think about this many couples who do see each other everyday tend to not always speak alot or make time for each other because they take each other for granted.In a long distant relationship you should make as much contact as possible if you dont then you must question yourself as to why you are not doing this
- as well as the normal ways of communicating webcams phone etc also try and do things that you have in common with each other watch the same movie for example one evening the when you speak next you can talk about it to each other and you also have the added pleasure of knowing that your partner is sharing the movie with you even though they are not physically there.
- As well as some of the disadvantages of living in a long distant relationship you should always embrace the more positive sides of being apart.You can have your own social life without clashing with your partners plans but also be prepared to have trust!!
- Trust in a long distant relationship is of paramount importance and without it the relationship is doomed.Trust of course works both ways and if you or you partner do socialise without each other as in any other relationship you must be honest and faithful, and also not question your partner through jealousy if there are no grounds for you to be jealous.
- Being positive is very important and for your long distance relationship to prosper you must not only communicate about now but what the future has in store for you and of course your ultimate goal is to be permanently together but if either of you at anytime feels that you are happy with the relationship as it is then its once again time to be honest so not to give false hope to your partner