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How to Keep Love Alive in a Long-Distance Relationship and Make It Work

Updated on June 21, 2012
Long-distance relationships are possible if you are committed to keeping love alive between the two of you.
Long-distance relationships are possible if you are committed to keeping love alive between the two of you.

How Do You Make a Long-Distance Relationship Work?

When circumstances force you into a long-distance relationship, don't despair. It is very possible to keep love alive even if you are separated by many miles. If you are serious about staying together and are willing to work at your relationship, you'll be able to make long distance work.

Set Clear Expectations

If the two of you start with different expectations for your long-distance relationship, you'll be setting yourself up for disaster. Spend some time talking about what you expect of the other before moving away. How often will you talk to each other? How often will you see each other? How long will you be apart? Is it an exclusive relationship? How serious is it?

Be Committed

For long-distance to work, you need to put the relationship and your partner first. Understand that the relationship is going to take a lot of effort. You need to promise each other that you will be emotionally there for each other even though you are separated. Trust is key in a long-distance relationship.

Don't Sweat the Small Stuff

No relationship is perfect. Problems come up. In a long-distance relationship, however, it’s harder to make-up since communication is from afar. Choose your battles wisely and be willing to forgive and forget. To make a long-distance relationship work, you need to be mature and reasonable.

Make Plans

It's important to have things to look forward to in order to keep your love alive. Plan visits far in advance. Distance and finances can make frequent trips difficult, but try to make them as often as you can. Maybe you can meet halfway if that makes it easier. Also consider going on vacations together and meeting at your destination.

Keep a Routine

It's important to stay in touch in a long-distance relationship. Calling at the same time each day (or whatever schedule you agree upon) will give you some stability. Video chats and texting will also help you feel closer. If you have a regular time set up, you'll be able to look forward to it. Scheduling time together also makes sure you prioritize the relationship.

Do Things Together

Make sure you still feel like you do things together even though you are apart. Pursue common interests. This will give you things to talk about keep you connected. You can also do things simultaneously like watching the same TV show.

Sweet Nothings and Unexpected Surprises

You'll need to mix things up to keep the relationship from going stale. Try new things and surprise your partner. Send love letters, homemade cookies, thoughtful gifts, or flowers for no particular reason other than to say "I love you." If you mostly communicate by phone, maybe send a sweet email to your love.


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    • Modern Lady profile image

      Modern Lady 5 years ago from Chicago, IL

      Thanks Tonipet! It does seem there are a lot more long-distance relationships. Perhaps technology is making them easier.

    • Tonipet profile image

      Tonette Fornillos 5 years ago from The City of Generals

      What a very helpful hub. Not sweating on petty things is what I find the most important as no relationship is perfect. If problems come up, it should be handled in a more fairly judgement and save the relationship from falling off.

      We're now in a world of long-distance relationship, so I'm sharing this! Thank you modern lady. You've said it all - great hub! Voted up.