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Married Men Make the Best Boyfriends

Updated on October 10, 2017
Mystee Crockett profile image

Mystee is a writer, entertainer and entrepreneur. Her column, Ask Mystee, has a large following. You can ask her questions: askmystee@gmail.

What's Love got to do with it?


My Own Experience

I've known lots of men, and I've had lots of boyfriends, and I can say, without exception, married men make the best boyfriends.

Before you get your knickers in a twist and get so mad you don't finish the article, hear me out. Everyone has needs. Married men, single women, and vice-versa. I'm not out to wreck homes or destroy families. Sometimes, people need a safe outlet. Married men provide a safe outlet for me, and I for them. It's not about ruining lives, but rather enhancing relationships.

For wives who are angry, disgusted or put off by the premise of the article, I'll be writing another just for you, with tips on how to keep your man happy at home.

Have You Ever Dated a Married Man?

Have you ever dated a married man?

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Married Men Like to Keep Things Simple

One of the most difficult parts of the dating world is complication. I'm just a simple girl who likes to have fun, and all too often, I'll start dating a guy, only to find out that he wants to get serious. He doesn't want me to text my other friends. He wants to know where I am and who I'm with all the time. Dating can get complicated, if one of the parties involved is looking to control the other, or if one person wants to get serious.

Married men, on the other hand, like to keep things simple. They are already committed to someone. The last thing they want to do is tie you down, and manage your life for you. A married man already has a complicated life. The reason he is stepping out, is to get away from some of those complications. He wants to have some fun, without being obligated to check in every five minutes with his location. A married man gives you the freedom you want, along with a whole lot of fun. Married men want to get away from their real life, if only for a few hours, just to have fun again.

Married men aren't looking for drama or a lot of complicated social involvement. They get all those things from marriage. What they do want is to have fun, without a lot of strings attached. Dating a married man is fun, if you aren't looking to get serious.

Guys Just Want to Have Fun


Married Men Want to Feel Attractive

Married men make great boyfriends because they like to have fun. Remember, they want to feel attractive. They appreciate it when you get all dressed up and go out for a drink. They like it when you look hot. They don't get jealous, instead they get all proud. They like having a hot woman smiling at them across the bar.

Even if the guy never sleeps with you, he might meet you at the bar a few times, to feel sexy again. Married men want to feel attractive, and they want to believe that you are really into them. They love the titillation of conversation with a beautiful woman. They want to feel sexy, and it boosts their confidence to spend time around you, especially when you take the time to look good.

You don't ever have to be intimate with a man to help him feel attractive. When you get all dressed up to go out, it makes you feel attractive too. Dating a married man doesn't need to involve sex, although it may lead to that. People like to feel attractive. When you dress up, you feel attractive, and the people you are with feel attractive being around you.

Rules for Dating a Married Man

Married Men Don't Just Want Sex

Sure, some married men only want to get lucky. But my experience is that what married men really want is someone to listen to them. They want to talk about work, and life, and their dreams, and their fears. Men have feelings too.

A lot of single guys want to hit-it and quit-it. They just want to bang as many girls as they can, before they grow up. Most married men are not like that. They might want to go to bed with you, but their commitment to their wife and family makes that very difficult.

Instead, married men want to feel attractive, important and heard. They want to feel like they matter. They might want sex, but what they really long for is a connection on a mental level, instead of, or in addition to a physical connection.

What a married man really wants is someone to listen and care, and show kindness and compassion.

Married Men Are Great Lovers

Most married men I've known, with some exceptions of course, have been great lovers. They are not only concerned with their own pleasure, but also about the woman. Married men are so grateful to have an enthusiastic partner, they tend to take very good care, between the sheets.

Married men aren't usually as picky as the single guys I know. What I mean is they appreciate when you dress up, and they don't look at your body with a critical eye. What they do is tell you how beautiful you are. Even if you're plain, they make you feel like the most beautiful woman alive.

They also like to experiment and do things they think their wives would never try. Most married men aren't too kinky, usually, but they do like to play in different rooms, with the lights on, and in other positions besides missionary. They like to live outside the box.

Married men usually like to please their partners just as much as they are seeking their own pleasure. They appreciate enthusiasm and creativity in the bedroom (or in the dining room!) and they express their own passion energetically.

More Rules for Dating a Married Man

Back to the Basics

Married men, and all men really, are just big boys. No matter how powerful they are in business, or how strong they are physically, they are boys. They want some basic things. Men want to feel important. They want to feel attractive. They want to feel smart and successful. Above all, they want a beautiful woman to listen to them. They want to feel like they matter.

Most married men don't want to cheat on their wives. It starts out innocuously. They stop for a drink. A beautiful woman smiles. They strike up a conversation. He sees her again, and she seems interested in what he says. He likes the way she smiles and listens, and touches his arm. He just wants to feel attractive. He doesn't come in with a plan to cheat. He comes in with a heavy heart, just wanting to feel heard.

Married men are like little boys. Inside, they long for the approval of a beautiful woman. They want respect. They want to be heard. They want to feel loved. These are things you can give a married man, easily, whether he is your boyfriend, your date for the night, or your husband.

You can give these gifts to your man. If you act interested, respect him, and have fun with him, chances are, he will never leave your side.


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    • profile image


      8 months ago

      This is kinda unhealthy. I agree that everybody has needs, but cheating is just a betrayal of trust. There are plenty of ways to go about those needs without betraying someone, like just having an open relationship. If they dont communicate enough and "have" to cheat to feel better, they shouldn't stay together :/

    • profile image


      21 months ago

      Not all married men, but some will put everything in front of their wives. Their wife become last priority. This is why the wife pulls away from them. Then he wants to play victim and go out looking for other women to date because his wife doesn't love him anymore. Some men don't want to keep up what they did to get their wives and then they wonder why they're not having sex and romance on a regular basis. If they keep up what they started, they won't have to go outside the marriage to feel wanted. And I know some wives do put their husbands last on the list as well. Both spouses need to continue romancing each other. It's a simple concept, but nobody wants to do it anymore. Pretty sad.

    • Mystee Crockett profile imageAUTHOR

      Mystee Crockett 

      2 years ago from Everywhere You Want To Be

      dashingscorpio, you could be correct. Maybe their excellent traits as boyfriends led them into less than stellar marriage. Which is another good reason not to get married!

    • dashingscorpio profile image


      2 years ago from Chicago

      "Married Men Make the Best Boyfriends"

      I seriously doubt marriage (creates) "great boyfriends".

      Odds are they weren't a-holes to begin with! Maybe it was their being a "great boyfriend" that led women to marry them. :)

    • Mystee Crockett profile imageAUTHOR

      Mystee Crockett 

      2 years ago from Everywhere You Want To Be

      Thanks Deborah for taking the time to read.

    • Deborah Demander profile image

      Deborah Demander Reno 

      2 years ago from First Wyoming, then THE WORLD

      This is an interesting article. Good tips for wives. I'll try it with my husband. He's my best friend. I guess I'll make him my boyfriend too.

      Thanks for writing.



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