Memories Are Fading
After my ex dumped me, a few weeks later I could barely remember what it was like to be with him. I can remember his voice, the way he laughs and all the other little things about him but at the same time, he feels like a figment of my imagination. Did I make him up? Or did I picture him to be someone he was not?
I was looking through pictures of us together and as I remembered those memories they really didn't feel real. They are dreamlike and blurry. The more I stared at the pictures of him the more he looked like a stranger, yet I knew him so well, or did I?
My only guess is that this is what our brains do after a shock in our lives occurs, it decides to blur the memories so cope with loss or pain. It is a strange coping mechanism. However, this might not happen to everyone but it makes me wonder, was the breakup really that shocking that my brain needed some way to deal with the pain? I feel fine now and it’s been a bit over a month, but am I fine or is my brain just tricking me?
When I tried to research this dreamlike memory topic all that came up was depersonalization disorder. I didn’t really relate to that because it is only memories with my ex that feel dream-like, I don’t feel like I’m detached from life. Anyway, I’m going to assume that because the breakup happened so fast my mind didn’t have time to process it properly. But that still doesn’t explain why the memories of us being happy together are blurry and fading fast. Maybe my brain is just protecting me from the real hurt. So how painful is it going to be when my ex moves on to someone new? What will my brain do to fix that I wonder? It is all very interesting.
That is all for today, it was just a quick thought that I wanted to write down. So, I am curious if this has happened to anyone else? Or if you have come to your own conclusion on why this is happening? I’d like to hear other peoples thoughts on this. Thanks for reading, take care.