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Middle-Aged, and It Sucks

Updated on February 4, 2015

Mike's Common Sense

Feeling depressed today. Kinda feeling my age. Today a very hot flight attendant came walking down the aisle of a 757 jet. Now this aircraft is 150ft or so long, and I was standing in the rear, so I got a real nice, long look of her and her long sexy legs. It was all very nice until she came up to me, and I gave her my best smile and said "How are you today?". She said "ok" and she didn't say anything more.

I then realized, that I am too old for her to even consider.

I wasn't really all that crushed, until later when I got a chance to think about it. "God damn, I'm never gonna be able to pull prime pussy anymore! I'm old and chubby, and I smell like cigars, and shit! That really sucks!"

And it really does.

Never again will I ever feel the delight of scoring a "ten"... But then considering that all the "tens" are about my daughters age, and that I am married, and that she would cut my balls off if I ever did get that lucky, I felt alittle better.

But I still feel old.

Oh well, there are still some hot looking flight attendants that are around middle age that I could still pull. Not that I would, mind you, I am married, and that cutting off of the balls part, and sitting down to pee for the rest of my life, scares me. But never the less, I COULD pull it.

As long as I suck in my tummy.

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    • trish1048 profile image

      trish1048 8 years ago

      Sounds like a plan to me :)

    • muley84 profile image
      Author

      Michael A Muehleisen 8 years ago from Miami,FL

      Hi Trish! My wife's last name is the same as mine, but to be on the safe side I better walk the straight and narrow.

    • trish1048 profile image

      trish1048 8 years ago

      As long as your wife's last name isn't Bobbitt, I think you'll be ok :)

    • profile image

      greansleeves 8 years ago

      When I was young, I was led to believe that young women went for older experienced men. So, I grew older in a hurry. Now, where are those young women? Still waiting to find myself one....

      Oh, wait! For that you need to own a Ferrari and fly business class. Dammit. Why didn't anybody tell me that!!!

    • muley84 profile image
      Author

      Michael A Muehleisen 8 years ago from Miami,FL

      Hi G-Ma. You Betcha I can still pull it. hehe

    • muley84 profile image
      Author

      Michael A Muehleisen 8 years ago from Miami,FL

      Hi Feline prophet, I have lots of hope, but like I said I am married. lol

    • muley84 profile image
      Author

      Michael A Muehleisen 8 years ago from Miami,FL

      Hi Violetsun, Its not getting old that bothers me, its others thinking I am old. lol

    • G-Ma Johnson profile image

      Merle Ann Johnson 8 years ago from NW in the land of the Free

      Where there is Hope there is Life...young or old...and being  a Senior isn't for wimps...believe me...and though my ex always said "it's just a number"  they all add up and friggen count...but we are who we are and is "The Circle of Life" as they say and our character is built from experience's of all kinds...so don't let it get to you Muley...we know you can still pull "it" ...hee hee LOL...G-Ma :O) Hugs & Peace

    • profile image

      Feline Prophet 8 years ago

      There, there, don't take on so...where there is life there is hope! :P

    • VioletSun profile image

      VioletSun 8 years ago from Oregon/ Name: Marie

      LOL! Being a baby boomer myself, it IS amazing how fast time goes, and how much for granted I took my younger years when I would get attention from men.  Nowadays, I have my sweetie to give me attention and loving hugs .:),  and yeah getting older is not much fun especially when one doesn't really feel  "old", but the numbers say otherwise.