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Mistakes I often see people making on dating sites

Updated on November 28, 2011

Are you making these mistakes on social dating sites?


Mistakes I see often with people posting on dating sites



There are a couple social and dating Internet sites that I do belong too, but only on the social part. I did meet someone, and we both have remained on the site, so we can keep in touch with our friends. There is one thing that I have noticed through the years of being on these social networks, and it is the amount of people who post constantly about how miserable their life is and was. It seems like 80% of the posting covers areas of their past. This person did this or that to them, is the top subject. There are so much negative comments regarding people of their past, the unavailability of people looking for their age group, as this list goes on. Each post they write contains the ‘injustice’ of their world. While reading these posts, I have often wonder would you want to date yourself?



Can you imagine meeting a stranger at the shopping mall, and all you spoke about was your woes. How do you honestly think you will be perceived? What if a stranger came up to you and only spoke of their problems? Would you not wish to get away from them as quickly as you can? In essence these cyber dating and social groups are the same thing. Some people do spend time reading what a person writes. If all they see over and over again is a person miserable and no one makes them happy, would they want to give them a chance? A person with good self-esteem would not. These people would be a caution sign at the least. When the world is responsible for your misery, it is easily to assume, they too will be added to that list eventually.



If you cannot relay areas of passion on these boards, you will also be over looked. Those who are so fixated in finding someone, and everything else in the world becomes meaningless, tend to not draw people in. Instead they repel people, from even getting to know them.



There are so many people looking for someone, and if the majority of people are complaining, why not try something different to be notice? The key is though; I am not suggesting you become a fake. If you cannot find pleasure in your life, then it is best you start searching within. It is also good to stop playing the victim. Everyone has been hurt get over it and yourself. If all you can do is talk about your misery, go to a counselor and learn how to move past it. People do not want a person with a lot of old baggage. Do not bring your ex’s into your writing. Write instead about the small joys that happen to you today.



If you use Internet social sites or not, does not matter. It is still the same principles. Would you want to date a person who waited for you to prove you are not worthy? Would you wish someone to put their past on your shoulders to weigh you down? If you answered no to these questions, than do you not think it is time for you stop doing it to others?


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    • Renee Abbott profile imageAUTHOR

      Renee Abbott 

      6 years ago from Arizona

      Dashingscorpio

      Thank you for your comments, and I absolutely agree. I did laugh about your comment of a job listing. Now with my imaginative mind, I carried it to the next step. Placing a resume with all the faults of the world and how oppressed the person is..

      Thank you again

    • dashingscorpio profile image

      dashingscorpio 

      6 years ago

      Very true!

      Instead of being positive,showing a sense of humor, and talking about the things they want....A large group of people use their space to "preach" or tell people what they DON'T want. Without realizing it they're telling the world this is the type of person they have been attracted to in the past! Do they really believe this will stop an "amoral person" from contacting them? LOL!

      They are better off talking about what they "want" and also listing (their attributes) of what makes them "special". People fail to realize they are in (competition) with every other profile to draw the attention of a "quality" person. A profile for lack of a better word is a "Want Ad". I've never seen a job listing that wasted space listing everything they did not want. Your goal should be to state what you're (looking for) and show why a person should "choose you". One man's opinion! :-)

    • Renee Abbott profile imageAUTHOR

      Renee Abbott 

      6 years ago from Arizona

      Yes Hattie so true and it is unfortunate. If they would just think, would i want to date me, they might stop..or might not..smiles

    • HattieMattieMae profile image

      HattieMattieMae 

      6 years ago from Limburg, Netherlands

      Yes fortunately this is what people do get caught in their past and never move forward!

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