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Baby Daddy Drama

Updated on September 13, 2014

Thanks for the feedback ladies!

I have gotten such a great feedback from my, 'Just Because I Got A Baby By Him Don't Mean Nothing.... Or Does It?' hub. There have been so many women who've reached out to me for advice on their Baby Mama or Baby Daddy Drama. I try my best to answer most of these wonderful ladies questions on how to deal with Baby Mama and Baby Daddy Drama, but for the most part the majority of these ladies are still in love with this man in the middle and neither are willing to let go of him. You ladies have to think about the situation that he put you in. You have a child by this person, so when you look at your beautiful baby, you can't help but have love for the person whom help you create such a magnificent treasure. It's perfectly understandable, but his reaction can be completely different from yours and what you have to understand is that you can't make him have the same feelings about the situation that you may have. A lot of women may think, "I'm having his baby, so I know that he's not going anywhere. " Not the case. In most instances, a man can see getting you pregnant is a trap and he'll take off on the next thing smoking in the opposite direction. It's harsh but it's true. Not all men are like this, but the ones that are don't make it easy on the good guys.

I have a story for you ladies about a friend of mine: So my friend met this guy at work and she knew he had a girlfriend, but he was persistent about getting with her. I mean, she could not move without him being hot on her tail. She knew that there was no future with this man, but he was just perfect enough to fool around with. And fool around they did, whenever they got the chance. It was wrong because, she knew that he did have a girlfriend. His girlfriend had two kids that were not his biologically, but he took care of them as if they were. He had one child from a previous relationship. My friend gets pregnant. This is her first child and she's 34 years old, so she sees this as the wonderful blessing that it is. She tells him and his first words are, "If you want to get rid of it, I'm with you.

" What?!

She felt that his reaction to the news that they had created a life, was a stressed reaction and she was sure that he would come around. Well he goes on vacation for two weeks and she finds out from a coworker that he took vacation time because he was getting married to his longtime girlfriend. Shock was an understatement.

He finally comes back to work sporting his shiny sterling silver wedding band. This broke her heart. She knew they were together, but according to him marriage was the one thing the he was not ready to do. Especially with her. Long story short, he completely stopped talking to my friend. Keep in mind that they worked in close proximity to each other. She could not perform her job without having some kind of contact with him. This made for a very stressed work environment. Coworkers watched on as she was getting bigger and his attitude change towards everybody. He didn't tell his wife until the baby was almost due.

A month before giving birth, her Ex boyfriend found out that she was pregnant and came to her, he wanted to give their relationship another try. He asked about the situation with the baby's father and when she told him the situation, he volunteered to be a father to her unborn child. What a blessing he was.

The biological father asked that a paternity test be done and the child was indeed his and she quickly put him on child support. I really admired that about her. If you know that he is not going to be there physically nor financially, why hesitate? Get your coins off the top.

Now that her child is two and she's moved on with her life, now the biological father wants in, after the hard part is over. She's not having it and I agree with her. He did want her to abort her one and only child after all . Who would want the person who basically had no problem with ending a precious child's life before it even began to even be aloud in the presence of that child.

"Kick rocks barefoot loser." Is what I say.

So now he goes around telling folks that, she doesn't let him see his baby. He's giving people this sad, sad story, but what he really needs to tell them is that, "I didn't want to be a father to our son, so she went out and got him a father that wanted to be there." I'm sure it does not feel good to have your child calling another man 'Daddy'. The best way you can get back at a person for doing you wrong, is to keep living your life to its fullest and making huge strides in a different direction. By letting them know that you can keep your head up and you don't need them to make sh*t happen for you by arguing, fussing and fighting. Success is the best revenge on a person trying to keep you down. You don't give him years to make a decision to be a father to his child, when you only had nine months to be a mother. My opinion. Thanks ladies for the comments. Keep them coming. :)

Please be honest.

Are you still in love with your child's father even though you two are not together?

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    • profile image

      lovelyred7 2 years ago

      Hi and thank you I have a question

    • tarkishat profile image

      tarkishat 2 years ago

      Hi lovelyred7! Welcome to hubpages!

    • profile image

      lovelyred7 2 years ago

      Hello I'm new

    • tarkishat profile image

      tarkishat 3 years ago

      Hi Dashingscorpio,

      Thanks for your comment. This is a topic that offers up many different opinions. My opinion is that it is really not fair that a man can get a woman pregnant and walk away until he is ready to take on the responsibility of being a father. It does take two to tango, but only one gets pregnant. Making a decision to keep your child will never be easy for a woman. It's not as simple as you're saying it is. Only an egotistical person would state such idiotic facts that they've read somewhere and regurgitate them out as if it should be so. Thanks again for your input.

    • dashingscorpio profile image

      dashingscorpio 3 years ago

      Voted up and interesting!

      "You ladies have to think about the situation that (he) put you in."

      I believe a lot of women blame men for being single mothers. However in only a woman in the U.S. has the right to determine whether a birth takes place or not. A man can beg a woman to have his baby but in the end (she) is the one who decides whether to or not. Might as well wait until you're married.

      With regard to the woman who decided to keep her child from the father it sounds like she is not looking out for the child as much as she wants to be vindictive. If the man is paying child support he should have the option to form a bond with his child even if she personally hates his guts!

      Too many kids don't have a father who wants to see them or be apart of their lives in anyway! It's tragic that a woman would intentionally keep her child from knowing his/her father because of her broken heart.

      Success would be showing she has "moved on" emotionally from him.

      "Anger is the Mask that Hurt wears."