Musing of a Fabulous Housewife
A Fabulous Housewife
The year was 1988, I landed my first job.I remember that year vividly .I was sitting in the JTPA Office vying for a job. I had taken the typing test and failed,needless to say a clerical job eluded me.I was undaunted as I sat at the edge my seat saying" i need a job will someone please give my a job."After two hours of begging Mr. Fontenot my then assistant principal said "i found one for you." I smiled brightly with the white slip in hand ,i was off to my first job.
I was to report to Our Lady of Lourdes. I worked in the linen department.I distributed clean linen to each room. I was blessed to have a good boss. Ms. Nancy she was funny and patient. I was even invited to her home a couple of times. Our relationship was nice.I have been a part of the workplace ever since. I have a degree and a few certificates ,substitute teaching ,real estate, etc. needless to say i am a very busy bee. The recession has been my worst enemy for almost a year and a half. so what's a girl to do?
Some little girls dream of marrying and having babies. That has never been my fantasy. I have always wanted to have a career. A full time housewife never occurred to me. I viewed it as a thankless job,I resented being one.I did not take this mantle up lightly. There was much inner rumbling about washing dishes, doing laundry, preparing dinner and the much dreaded social outings. All which requires a level of grace and intelligence. When we did attend social gatherings , I was a wall flower while my partner mingled unburdened.
After a few months with not even a nibble from potential employers. I began to shift and my attitude changed via meditation and prayer. I began to appreciate the flow of the warm water as I filled the sink to do dishes. My chest beamed with pride as I use my organizational skills to keep a beautiful home, oh alright, nice!I enjoy decorating during the holidays I have a theme for each one, I love the elegant effect of light touches, I am not a fan of over the top anything, simplicity is my best friend.
I decided to take the time to create a exercise plan I run three times a week and when time does not permit i walk around my block or dance. I find my self planning the next day's dinner before I go to bed at night. I love the way the golden light shines through our home in the morning, we usually enjoy a cup of tea or coco.I am more socially outgoing. I embrace people and I strike up conversations at social gatherings. I am quite witty when I put my mind to it. I am a part of a blended family, so navigation of these dynamics must be handled carefully. I work to keep peace and balance by paying attention to who they are and how I can assist them. I try not to work too hard at this cause no one likes a kiss ass.
At first, I question my self worth and my contributions to my household . Next, I defined my self worth for myself . Finally, I use this experience as an opportunity to grow and learn more about myself and those closet to me. Hence, musings of a fabulous housewife. For anyone who has had to transition from working girl to housewife it's uncomfortable and it can be difficult. However, if you persevere there will be rewards. You will have look up long enough to appreciate the hidden blessings in this journey. We are all greater than what we do and what we do should be a means to spend time with those we love and to teach us to grow in some way or another.Just food for thought.
What I take from this experience is that their is joy in the simple things; like washing dishes, taking out the trash, and even burning the rice. Hey, have you ever salvaged a ruined meal, it's fun. I realize that currency comes in many forms and some are far greater than what can be measured by dollar value.I enjoy that I have found things that I can enjoy about my station in life that's invaluable to me.
How to be a Fabulous Housewife or Not
There are two distinct arguments about being a house wife. One is for the other against being a house wife.In her article, Lisa Wade(Most Women Would Rather Divorce than be a House Wife) Mrs. Wade cites material from Kathleen Gerson's The Unfinished Revolution.Which states that 80% of women and 70% of men desire an egalitarian marriage. They prefer a household with two breadwinners,shared housekeeping responsibilities and equal rearing of the children. It appears that the percentages shift after one of two things happen ,pay rate increase or birth of a child . 70 percent of men desire his wife to de-prioritize her career for home and family while the wife values a high paying salary more than child rearing and keeping house.
On the other side of this argument is author Ann Voskamp (One Thousand Gifts) who is a farmer's wife and are homeschooling six kids(count them six) and still found time to write a NY Times bestseller.Ann's definition of Homemaking - Home making is about making a home and a home is a safe place, a refuge, a place to be real and alive and truest true. Home making is not about making perfection.I laugh, emancipated: A perfect home may not be a neat as pin home I laugh, emancipated: A perfect home may not be a neat as pin home perfect does not equate to immaculate The two does not match,compute correspond A perfect home is an authentic, creative, animated space where Peace and Love and Beauty are Embraced.
Her sentiments are beautiful. Unfortunately ,whether by design or necessity, most of us are forced to make a choice. This author has managed to strike the right balance between the two, her home and career, it's refreshing.
As, I continue to research the matter, the term house wife varied. How ironic that a woman of means can have a nanny, a cook and a driver and still be considered a housewife.While in the most basic sense it means taking care of house and family.While women of lesser means always worked to support her family in and outside her home.
I was curious about part of the international community. I goggled a cite called , China through A Lens. This article includes a study done by ;Haidian , a district of high economic and cultural development.It concluded that 62% percent of professional women working in that district, if given an option, would prefer to be a house wife.These women said they only worked to support their families. They were not interested in self improvement or social standing.
He Liying, an expert Family and Marriage,held a slightly different view.He states that the lower a woman's income and educational level, the more she worries about her position and society On the contrary those those who have a higher income and educational level do not believe their "going home" will not affect their position in the family.Still, another thought on the subject comes from,Yang Yiyong, a human rights expert and deputy secretary-general of the China Labor Studies Society who says that "work ,can housewives status "Only when society fully recognizes the value of house be truly raised." Countries like Japan and Holland have laws to protect housewives. In these countries men can be househusband with the same rights although most men prefer not to.
Although the majority of American women find being a career woman more attractive .It is nice to know that some people value being a housewife and even better to see some countries implement laws to protect women or men who take this route. Being both a working woman for years and a house wife for maybe a year and a half . I see my time,my energy, and resources as valuable inside and outside a home.
Tips On Staying Fabulous
I have listed a few survival tips for being a fabulous housewife;
2.exercise ,great for stress reduction and a girl has got to look good
3.be prepared to be taken for granted
4. congratulate you self often it is hard work
5.learn to laugh at your self, take it easy.