- Gender and Relationships»
- Relationship Problems & Advice
Dealing With Cheating Lovers
Fight or Flight?
Cheating seems to be quite common these days. The easiest way to deal with cheating men is to leave them for good. It is no use to stay in a relationship not built on honesty. If a man has cheated early on in your relationship, what will stop him from doing the same thing again. Forgiveness may be an option but women who choose this path must thread cautiously.
Here is a 5-step plan to deal with cheating men and getting past them.
1. Don't put the blame on yourself.
When confronted with cheating in any relationship, most women themselves when it should not be the case. It is not entirely a woman's fault that a guy cheats. He has issues and the woman is often the victim who ends up getting hurt. If a guy has issues early on with respect to you or the relationship, he must be man enough to face and address it. If it is not the case, it is better to end the relationship early on.
Blaming yourself for his faults will not be good to your self-esteem. The guy should sort out his head on his own. It is not wise to blame yourself why a relationship ends because of cheating. It could be that you are not really meant to be together int he first place.
2. Forget trying to change him.
A guy cheats because he wants to do it. There is nothing a woman can do to stop a guy if he wants to cheat on her. There is no magic potion that a woman can get hold off to change a guy in this aspect. The initiative must come from him. Do not ever have the mistake of thinking that you can change his ways.
3. It is not the end of the world.
Discovering that the person you are with is cheating on you is the worst thing you can think of. It is betrayal that will only become worst if you believe that this guy is the one you want t be with but this is not the end of the world. Time will always help you get over a cheating guy.
To help deal with pain, filling up your schedule with worthwhile activities will help recovery and healing. Learn to go out and enjoy your time with close friends and family. One day you will realize that shedding a tear for an undeserving cheat has been a total waste of time.
4. Learn the reasons
A man will cheat for a lot of reasons. Men are strange creatures and they want things differently. He can be influenced by a lot of factors, such as upbringing, influences and environment. Most of the time, you have nothing to do with it and that you can do nothing about it. Some men cannot live with just one woman. Unfortunately, your boyfriend could be one of these types. It is also possible that he is not really committed in the relationship in the first place. It can happen that he does not love you at all. It is best for you to move on and think of him as an unwise choice.
5. Chose and stand for your decision
Trying to change a man is a shot for them moon. Decide and stand firmly with any decision you make. You can end the relationship or give him another chance. If you decide to end the relationship, learn a lesson from this experience and move on. Surely, there is going to be another guy more deserving of your love. Learn to choose wisely.