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My Online Dating Story

Updated on July 18, 2013

How I Found Happiness With Online Dating

By the time I approached the final days of a long and painful divorce that had taken several years to resolve, I had more or less convinced myself that my dating days were over. After thirty years spent with the same person, sharing, caring and sometimes despairing, I was certain that I was not likely to find anyone else who would have me. Not at my time of life.

Not that I was old, particularly, not by today's standards but I was quite set in my ways, used to a routine and not sure that I wanted to change that routine.

Until, that is, some of my colleagues at the office intervened. They had noticed that I was becoming more isolated and withdrawn and less involved in the social life that often develops in the workplace alongside the daily work routines. "Why don't you register on a dating site" was a question I was frequently asked, my answer always being along the lines of, "perhaps, I might, maybe, sometime". More than once the response to my initial lack of enthusiasm was, "well, if you don't do it , I'll do it for you".

They often said they would do it, but I didn't think that they would actually go through with it. I was wrong however, without knowing it I had been registered with an online dating site.

One day, an email appeared in my inbox from someone I did not know, with a rather unusual name. It was obviously a pseudonym. Like many people I am cautious about opening emails from senders that I do not recognise but, nevertheless, I threw caution to the wind, clicked on the message and opened it.

"I saw your profile and just had to say hello, we have so much in common." As I read those words I realised what had happened; my colleagues had carried out their threat and registered me with a dating website. As a result, I was receiving messages from people who might, just might, make suitable companions for me now that I was free, single and available for the first time in almost 35 years.

Several more messages appeared over the next few days and I began to respond to them, thoughtfully, sensitively and in, what I thought was, an interesting and engaging way.

What became clear, however, was that most, if not all, of my correspondents at that time, were actually not that suitable at all. On the surface, perhaps, there was some common ground but as the conversations developed and we got to know each other in more depth, it was apparent that we were very different people and would probably not make good partners for one another.

Despite this, I was impressed and more than a little surprised by the ease with which I had been able to engage with people in this way and hold perfectly good, interesting email conversations with them. I realised that I was hooked and very keen to find someone to share my life with so I set about looking for ways in which I could improve my interactions with more suitable potential partners in the future.

It was, once again, one of my very supportive colleagues who came to the rescue by suggesting that I register with a dating website that uses a personality profile questionnaire in order to match people to one another more accurately. A week or so later and I was well and truly registered with the dating website, my profile was created and I began to receive more targeted, accurately matched contacts.

After a few “dead ends” I noticed the profile of a very interesting lady, her list of likes matched my own and we really did appear to have similar views on a variety of topics and many things in common. What’s more, she appeared to have added me to her list of “favourites,” which was really good news.

We exchanged a few emails and then, after an initial period of hesitation, decided to meet. As is suggested by all the experts, the first meeting took place in a very public place, the beautiful Chatsworth Park in Derbyshire UK.

The afternoon went well, once the initial uncomfortable feelings of meeting with a stranger had been overcome. We talked for hours and both of us seemed to be enjoying ourselves. I had been trying to work out how best to say that I wanted to see her again but I needn’t have worried, she did it for me. We met the very next weekend.

The rest, as they say, is history. We’ve been together now for almost a year and we are very happy together. Without the online dating service, and the perseverance of my friends and colleagues, it would almost certainly not have happened. I’m glad that it did, I doubt that I would ever have met anyone so perfect through any other channel.

I am well and truly converted on to the online way of meeting and developing a partnership with someone new and I wholeheartedly recommend it to everyone who wants to meet that “special someone”.


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