My Toastmaster winning Humorous speech at club Level titled Men vs. Women
Let me share my toastmaster winning Humorous Speech Contest. This speech let me win 3rd place at Toastmasters Club level Humorous Speech Cotest 8th September 2011.
The speech begin like this:
Good evening fellow toastmaster, ladies and Gentlemen.
On April 1, 1992 published the famous book - Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus by John Gray, PhD, total 286 pages.
How many people heard about this book? Please raise your hand.
How many people never heard about this book? Please raise you hand.
How many will not raise your hands no whatever I ask?
<I will based on the audience respond to make the statement below:>
It is proven that men/Women listen better then Women/Men!
Do you think Women listen better or Men listen better?
Ladies and Gentlemen, please take a look at this mug! Let me tell you how I got it.
One day during lunch time, I received a phone call from my wife. At that moment, my mouth was full of food. My wife called my cell phone tell me that she was upset with her boss. As luck would have it, I was choking on the food and could only reply “hmm… hmm…” for a looong Life-threatening 900 seconds (15 minutes) as she finished her complaint. As I swallowed the food (gulp), I ended the phone conversation saying that I needed get a glass of water.
The next day, I got this big mug “World’s Best Hubby" as a gift and have to carry it around at office every day!
Mr. Gray said that men complain about problems because they are looking for solutions. When women complain about problems, they want their problems to be acknowledged.
Gentlemen, better choke to "death" and do not disturb your lady when she is talking. Your lady will love you until the day you die.
Do you agree with statement "better choke to "death" and do not disturb your lady when she is talking. Your lady will love you until the day you die."
Men are straight creatures. Men love their ladies at the “age” when they got married. (Special highlight: But I am sure that not the men read/listen to my speech here. only men outside here.)
Let me show what I mean on these probe:
These men love his ladies at the “age” of married.
After 20 years, these men still love his ladies at the same “age” of married.
After 40 years, these men still love his ladies at the same “age” of married.
Ladies, so you can see "Men are straight creatures." (Again this only applied the men outside here and not the men read/listen to my speech here.)
Ladies, most of time the ladies forget about this simple rules and does not keep to rule of "Not Change".
Ladies and Gentlemen, let me show share this example:
Maggie Cheung at age 20 years old
Ladies and Gentlemen, let see this lady after few decade... How you feel? <With a big smile...>
What if she turn out like this???
Or Ladies and Gentlemen, you would prefer this? <With a big smile...>
Still look great at 47 years old.
Ladies and Gentlemen, fellow toastmaster, let summaries my speech.
1. So Gentlemen, shut up and listen. Your lady will love you more. As for ladies, there is no need to listen, just solve the problem for your men.
2. Ladies, "Men are straight creatures”. As a men, my advice is to try to maintain yourselves as you were before. "DO NOT CHANGE", "DO NOT CHANGE", "DO NOT CHANGE". Or change slowly bit by bit . Your man will love you more.
As the saying goes, “A man is not complete until he gets married. Once he gets married, he is finished.” (gesture with hand)
Dear reader, this is about a Humorous Speech, all about Humorous. Have fun...