- Gender and Relationships»
- Romantic Intimacy
Understanding Men. Don't Give 100% Trust
Don't Trust Men
Don't have trust in a man until he has earned it. Its that simple. I have seen women give too much to men way too soon. If you have seen my writings before on Hubpages, then you will already have an idea of what I will say when it comes to intimacy.......Don't do it! You won't regret it!
Any man who loves and cares about you will tell you the same thing. Your father, your brother, and close relatives. Did you ever wonder why?
The answer is because they are men and they know that ALL men are basically opportunists who will chew you up and spit you out if given half the chance. This ugly mindset changed once a man truly loves you.
We all know that when a man proposes to a woman it is a sign of respect, by the same token, we know that when a man does not propose, it is a sign of disrespect. There is a lot of disrespect going around these days because modern feminists just have no clue.
They think that they can treat men the same way they treat other women, and no matter how much the liberal movement tries to make apples into oranges, it is simply not fact, and those who try to fight nature will be doomed to a lifetime of unhappiness, and rejection.
After meeting a man for the first time, you should plan on not sleeping with him for at least a few months. I know women who do not sleep with men until they are married, and guess what? They find themselves married very quickly. You do not have to take it to this level to be respected, because you want to get to know him, and decide if you really want to marry him. But, you should always wait several months before allowing intimacy for sure. This will give him a very high respect for you, and if you should ever break up for some reason, the next girl who jumps into bed with him right away will be viewed unfavorably against you. No matter what other attributes she has.
You should also not be at a man's beck and call either. When a man calls and you are right by the phone, and he is always the first one to end the conversation, you are putting yourself at risk of being viewed as a loser.
No one wants to marry a loser. Men want a woman they have to win. We all value things that we have to work hard for, and just take a look around and note that most women do not play hard to get, and they are usually the ones trying to get their guy to marry them instead of the other way around.
I have had it happen to me and I have spoken to many women who have been used in numerous ways. The thing that has been consistently wrong was that trust was given based on nothing. Men will lie big to get whatever they want, and will think nothing of letting you down.
They simply move on to the next girl, and start all over again. "No big deal, she was a whore anyway. " That is what they will tell others in effort to remain blameless. I have had long discussions with women who have had decades long relationships with guys and trusted them thoroughly. They believed that their boyfriend was at least civilized, only to be devastated by an unpleasant surprise. The guy suddenly married a Chinese mail order bride. Yes, this actually happened.
A lady who was as beautiful, sweet, intelligent, and kind as can be was devastated when her boyfriend who was cheating with a Chinese woman ended up marrying her. He simply decided to get some action from this Chinese woman, and as it turned out the woman was such a good manipulator that she had gotten him to marry her, and after they were married, she put intense pressure on him to be cruel to his girlfriend. They ended up stealing from the nice girl and basically turned her life around forever. At that point the guy stopped caring for her, because he had gotten himself into this mess, with this Chinese woman and decided that he had to put his attention with his new wife from now on. Until this moment, the guy gave off the impression of being nice, and having it together. Women must have it together themselves and not rely on their feeling of purpose from their man.
Never assume that your relationship with your man is different and he will not cross certain lines out of decency. If you are not married to the guy yet, then he has not reached the level of respect for you yet, that should allow you to trust him.
Men Lie and Cheat
If you realize that they lie and are not to be trusted, you will know to always protect yourself, and never let your guard down.
A devastated lady told me that she thought her boyfriend was cheating and asked him if he was up to anything. He denied any wrong doing and said that she was the only woman in his life. There were clues everywhere, not to mention his attitude, so she decided to ask her girlfriend to drive her to his office and see what was happening. Sure enough a woman got into his car with him, and they both drove off together and it appeared that they were going to the other woman's house. When she confronted him, he actually lied. He lied so convincingly that she started to doubt what she had actually seen. Men have all read the same book about how to lie to a woman.
Men Use Women
Its true that men are opportunists who use women. This is why women of two generations ago did not have sex with men until they were married. The wisdom of male psychology was passed down from female to female, and our society became the most civilized in the world. Life in the United States in the 19th century, and until the mid 20th century was a society in which there were marriages, families and a strong middle class, as compared to other countries in which women struggled with babies out of wedlock, and poverty. Sadly, the wizdom of past generations was thrown away as "old fashioned", while the well thought out reasons for having society rules were ignored. As a result, there are 50 times more unwed women who struggle in poverty to raise their children than there were in the 1960s and that number is rapidly growing.
In the good old days, women knew that if they had sexual intercourse with a man, he would lose interest, and find a way to dump her. Instead of becoming a "fallen women" , she would make the guy get to know her, by dating her. In other words, taking her out, engaging in conversation, and pursuing hobbies together. With sex out of the way the guy has no choice but to see YOU. If the sex is there, he will only think of the sex. And most men simply do not fall in love with having sex with one woman. Once he has had you, he is basically done with you, in most instances. The hunt is over and he will probably even have a degree of a lack of respect for you because you were not challenging enough.
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