ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel
  • »
  • Gender and Relationships»
  • Relationship Problems & Advice»
  • Breaking Up

All About Love

Updated on August 3, 2017

Learn to Let Go

Anybody in their lifetime has experienced giving up on someone they love. Be it because circumstances asked for it, or because it's forbidden. The latter means, that they are letting their mind rule over their heart for they know that it's the right thing for them to do.

Whatever the reasons, setting someone free is the best way to do it because you know that it will make somebody happy even if you're dying inside. This is you being selfless because you are thinking of the other person's happiness.

Letting go is a very difficult learning process, nevertheless, it's here where you can measure how strong you are. When you have come to realize that it will not do you any good to hold on to that person and the moment you realize you cannot have them forever, then it's time to set them free.

You will get hurt, but it's better to leave them broken because time will just heal the pain. Eventually, that person will learn to accept that you did it because you don't want to cause any trouble to them. Remember, things happen for a reason and at the right time, the answers will be revealed. If this person is for you, then he/she will just come back to you. If not, then, let go and move on.

Cyber Lover

Before there is letter writing, they were called pen pals, then the telephone was invented and they are known as phone pals. The used of mobile messages called them text mates and at this age and time exposed on the Internet they became chat mates. The product of all of these are sweethearts, lovers, partners, cyber lovers or whatever you would like to call it.

However, is it safe to have what will you call as the latter? I mean, you have not met the person in person. You have doubts, but still, you continue to go on because you love the feeling of having somebody who takes care of you and what you feel and you could talk to without any apprehension even if you still don't know if the one you are talking to or revealing yourself with is real. Without even finding out if, what the person is telling you are the same as when you meet face- to- face or there is even a bigger probability that whom you are dealing with might even be a Psycho.

The point here is that, learn to trust your instincts and gut feelings and look for possible signs. I was a product of the Internet Technology. My husband and I were chat mates, but the good side of it was, we came from the same place and continent that's why it's very easy to investigate if he's telling the truth or not. I am not suggesting that all in cyberspace will end up like us. There is what you call as the great risk. Therefore, it is important to be alert at all times.

There are those who at first, will look as if they are really the one you are looking for, but in the end, there are telltale signs. Like sometimes, they pretend to be interested in you. They will ask you about your work, how much you are earning and then at the long run, they are just fishing for more information about you so that they will know how fat your bank account is and if you are that stupid enough you might end up as a victim of these so-called frauds. On the other hand, if not, like what some Asian women do, will make you their easy passport. Sometimes access, so they could escape the kind of life they're living (poverty, hardships). Some might even put a mask and make you believe that they are always there when you needed someone to cry on, a sounding board, etc. and then use your vulnerability to their own advantage because they just want to play around.

There are so many signs, you just have to open your mind and tell the difference. Sometimes it pays to see the person you are chatting with through a webcam because you could see their facial expressions and body language that will help you with your assessment of them. You can never tell. So be very cautious because your life may be at stake.

Falling in Love with a Friend

Sometimes too much closeness or as they say: "too close for comfort" can lead close friends to fall in love with each other. How many times did it happen that in a group of friends of both sexes, there is really a pair who will be attracted to each other?

This usually happens when a problem arises and the person seeking comfort from a friend of the opposite sex will tend to reach out to him/her and uses that person as a shoulder to cry on or the classic I-need-you-please-stay-with-me buddy. Instead of feeling depressed, mix emotions and confusion will surface, sometimes mistaking that feeling to love.

If this will happen, will you jeopardize the friendship in exchange for something that might be just short live? Before doing it, you must think and weigh things out. For once, like what I have said, you might just be confused. Maybe the person is just there to comfort you. However, if in case that person felt the same way with you, think of the consequences that your action will do. Try to ask these Questions:

  • Will we still be friends if we fall out of love with each other? After the feelings subside, one of you might tend to fall out. Are you ready to take this chance knowing that you cannot bring back the same closeness you have when you were still friends? Think about the time spent and the relationship you had with that person. If you are willing to gamble, then lost the friendship after, then go for it!

  • Is the relationship worth a try? If the basis for this is, an attraction at the spur of the moment because he/she caught you in your most defenseless state or you are helpless then, stop and think. The best thing to do is, hear the advice of another close friend of the same sex because they will give you sound advice. Knowing that you choose to believe what you just want to hear or see because you are too blinded by your emotions, they will direct you to what is the right thing for you to do because they know what is right as your mind is clouded while they can think clearly.

  • Does love starts in friendship? So, they say. However, not at all times. Some friends become lovers or lifetime partners, but some are better off as friends. Do not embarrass yourself by pushing a relationship with that person. Meaning, be contented with the friendship. If things turn out to be different and there is a potential that you would become an item, then it is for you to decide if you are going to risk it or not. Just make sure that there's no room for regrets if the outcome will not be what you expected it to be.


Submit a Comment

No comments yet.