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One Final Fling Before The Ring

Updated on July 16, 2011

One Final Fling Before The Ring

The idea of having one final fling before the ring is starting to become more acceptable. It really does make good common sense not to enter into a lifetime partnership, a marriage, without having dated a few other people first.

Where things start to go really wrong is when this experimentation in new relationships takes place when inebriated and on a hen or stag night. That is one very steep learning curve and likely to result in a marriage fated for failure before it ever gets started.

Anyone planning a marriage should be thinking of a forever commitment and the idea of a divorce should not even be part of the formula. Marriage is, or should be, as the vows say, "till death do us part". A final fling before the ring is not a bad idea.

Celtic Wedding Rings

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Many people are sure when they get married that they are making the right decision. Good, way to go.

If there are doubts however then these really need to be eliminated before marriage is ventured into. A good proportion of young people today will have had several short and/or long term relationships. They know what the score is. They know all people are different.

Not all however. Some have only had one or two partners, perhaps even with the same girlfriend or boyfriend from when they were at school. That is wonderful, marvellous and highly romantic as long as they have no doubts.

If there are doubts then these must be discussed. If you are about to spend your life together you must be able to talk about and discuss anything with each other. If you cannot then the grounding on which you base a marriage is already in trouble.

 

If marriage has been talked about then it is the time to eliminate doubts. It is time to be serious and have a heart to heart talk. This needs to be done before that engagement ring is placed on her finger let alone a wedding band.

Now is the time to say "I want to be sure. I think that we should see other people for a little while." It doesn't mean that love has died it means exactly what it says 'I want to be sure'. This is love, it actually shows caring and commitment to a secure and happy future together.

There is a risk of course that one or other of the partnership will find someone else. It is just as likely that they won't and will want to cut the experiment short.

It is though important that both partners are sure and that One Final Fling Before The Ring is a good idea.

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  • Peter Dickinson profile image
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    Peter Dickinson 7 years ago from South East Asia

    Hello, hello - I actually do agree with you. Personally if I am ready to get married I would be sure, I would not need to experiment with a fling. As you say, everyone is different and for some I believe a fling is not only important but essential. There would be a lot less heartbreak and divorce if flings were put out of the way before a marriage.

  • Hello, hello, profile image

    Hello, hello, 7 years ago from London, UK

    I don't think I can agree with you, Peter. If you need a last fling then to mind you are not sure. Also wouldn't that last fling overshadow for a long time. As they say everyone is different.

  • Peter Dickinson profile image
    Author

    Peter Dickinson 7 years ago from South East Asia

    travel_man1971 - I agree. I never strayed in thirty years with my wife. Never wanted to either.

  • Peter Dickinson profile image
    Author

    Peter Dickinson 7 years ago from South East Asia

    Anath - I reckon that if a couple are mature enough to go into a marriage accepting that each would 'play away' then fair enough. It works for some but hurts others badly. Better not to commit to one within marriage then.

    On a personal note. I am no longer married and currently have a number of ongoing and extremely complicated relationships and make no secret to my partners (I love them all). I/We do not discuss the others between ourselves. It works well, but would not do for most folks. I feel though that if I were to marry again (no plans or intentions) I would commit 100% to my partner.

  • travel_man1971 profile image

    Ireno Alcala 7 years ago from Bicol, Philippines

    Hi, Sir Pete! Commitment is the name of the game when you agreed to tie the knot.

  • Anath profile image

    Anath 7 years ago

    Can someone be really sure to want to spend the rest of its life with someone else? I find that idea very difficult to digest. On the contrary, the idea of a fling is forever so tempting that I would be sad to call it "my last fling"

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