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Online Dating...A Bad Experience!

Updated on September 22, 2016
kmartel profile image

K.D. Martel is a writer, published author and artist working from her studio in the province of Québec, Canada.

This happened to me personally a little over a year ago, I have come a long way since then!!

I have been off and on dating sites for 8 years now, and I have actually had two relationships through online dating. But after a while, I become blasé because it always ends up being the same result. With time and experience, I realize that men do not read the profiles, but only look at your profile picture and that's it! When I ask them if they have actually read the info I provide on myself and what I am searching for they kind of ha-hum and say, ''well, no, not really...''

I take the time and effort to write exactly what I am searching for, the age group, and what I DO NOT WANT: example: online sex, married or otherwise NON single men, no picture, web cam , men from other countries (the ones wanting to marry and leave their country of origin and come to a better country to live in), etc. I still get the ones, young, way out of my age range (I'm 42, they are 19-26...come on), married, engaged, young 24 year olds from Morocco and Algiers...swinging couples, etc. You get the picture, oh yeah, and the ones without no pictures! Most of the time, I don't even bother to reply, stating in my profile that all of the above will not be answered to. The few that I do take the time to answer to have all the requirements, but are looking just for adventures...sorry, already stated in my profile I want a serious relationship, no players, no one niters, no mistress, blah, blah. And for the few I do choose and that are looking for the same as me, well, I meet them in a social setting, but darn, some still manage to get under the radar and dupe me! The following is a flagrant example that really happened to me and just goes to support the fact that men REALLY do not even bother to read your profile or they just don't give a damn and try anyways!

After being alone for a year and a half, about a month ago, I met this wonderful man online . Actually, he persisted so much after me, wanting to talk to me over the net until I finally gave in, even though I wasn't interested much more than that. We finally met over coffee, talked for almost three hours and hit it off like I haven't seen myself do in years! I accepted to see him again. He would call me every second evening or so, we would talk a bit, just to say hi.

We finally ended up spending a wonderful weekend together. He was always attentive to me, and I was starting to actually wonder if I had finally found the man I was looking for all these years! He left on a Sunday , telling me that he would call me Monday. He ended up calling me that same evening just to say hi. The next day, I didn't hear from him, so I called him instead, around 8.45 pm. He seemed a little curt with me, telling me he had just got home and that he was making his dinner and that he would call me back. I said okay, feeling a bit embarrassed.

Well, you guessed it, he never called me back. Two evenings later, I saw him on msn and after being half an hour online , decided to say hi to him because he wasn't talking to me. He started off by saying he was sorry for not getting back to me, but had been occupied that night and finished doing everything late. He also mentioned that his friend had called him, then his sister and I, never giving him time to get his work boots off! Boy. did I feel cheap there..I didn't say much and just told him that I was sorry and would not call him without having his permission! He then said, ''I told you that I would call you.'' Okay...I get it.

The next morning, I wrote him an email after spending sleepless night thinking about all that. I told him, if you are really searching for the same thing as me, as you had told me when we first me, then, I am ready to continue with you, if I don't hear back from you, well, I take it as a sign that I was only and adventure. He never wrote back, called back, nothing. Boy, did I feel taken for a ride there! OUF !


© 2009 K D Martel

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    • profile image

      misty 

      6 years ago

      my ex is on 3 of these websites he will marry someone he is looking for another woman to pay his way in life! its pretty scary that he was an abusive alcoholic who beat up our daughter but puts that he never drinks ( not right now he is trying to quit but will always be able to return) and he beat our daughter up and puts he is open to children he hasnt talked to his own children or helped in any way shape or from for 4 years so women she be very careful there is a reason they are on there!

    • profile image

      genesis321 

      6 years ago

      I totally agree, all of the men on those online dating sites are only looking for one thing, sex! I was on blackpeoplemeet.com, decide to use the site after seeing one of there advertisements on tv. Bad idea, meet this guy, blessed4life38& he was everything that I wanted & more. So I thought. Spend several months with him & we talk2d about getting married & have kids. One day he just ups and leaves never 2 return again. I sent a few weeks calling, texting & emailing him. He only responded when it was convenient for him, pretty much letting me know that there was someone else. I felt like such an ass! I will not try online dating anymore, it's too overrated!

    • kmartel profile imageAUTHOR

      K D Martel 

      6 years ago from Quebec, CANADA

      Yes salman-sardar, I do! :)

    • salman-sardar profile image

      salman-sardar 

      6 years ago

      Well, I am very aware of this situation actually,

      KMartel,Would you like to share what is your position now. You got someone yet ? Hopefully Yes

      I am waiting for your answer.

      Regards !

    • profile image

      texas 

      7 years ago

      thank you the one sided relationship ...what an eye opener...thank you when your in that type of relationship its hard to see only because you dont want to....

    • kmartel profile imageAUTHOR

      K D Martel 

      9 years ago from Quebec, CANADA

      thanks pertibha321! I have a funny ending to this article that I'll be sharing soon..take care

    • pertibha321 profile image

      pertibha321 

      9 years ago from india

      hum i am agree with you on this topis i have been got the same results most of the men on online dating sites are just for sex.byethway thanks to share your experiance.

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