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Orbiting, The Dating Term That Should Have You Worried

Updated on November 11, 2019
Karen Whitefield profile image

Karen Whitefield loves to read, write and nap. Find her at true marriage stories [dot com].

What is Orbiting?

You know that person you once dated or thought dated and went no-contact with (because it didn't work out for the reason a lot of relationships don't work) is still following you on social media and "liking", "laughing" and "loving" al your posts, well, he is still "orbiting" you. This dating trend is an exclusive result of the internet. In the past, when there was no social media, if you broke up with someone or ghosted them, the "ghostee" wouldn't come back haunting you on your social media. This way the person you ghosted still maintains a presence in your life and that can be both confusing and strange. After all, you may have started dating someone and you have this weirdo appreciating that mini-dress you over at Coachella. But this is not all! When it comes to texting you back, this person doesn't make the effort. Starnge? Read on.

This dating trend is an exclusive result of the internet. In the past, when there was no social media, if you broke up with someone or ghosted them, the "ghostee" wouldn't come back haunting you on your social media.

Are You Being Orbited?

If that cute guy you dated the year before ghosted you and suddenly liked your Instagram post about you holidaying in Hawaii and yet the other day when you'd sent him a "Hey Wassup" message, he didn't replay. Well, you are being orbited. You, know just like the Earth orbits the Sun but doesn't really meet it? That's what this guy is doing. You text, he PMs you. You call, he "likes" your post. He isn't really willing to have any direct conversation and is just "orbiting" you. So, is it important that you are "ghosted" in order to be "orbited". Not necessarily. We could also be looking at an ex who you mutually separated from, but is back to haunt you on social media. So, know that there are no hard boundaries here.

You, know just like the Earth orbits the Sun but doesn't really meet it? That's what this guy is doing. You text, he PMs you. You call, he "likes" your post. He isn't really willing to have any direct conversation and is just "orbiting" you.

How Orbiting Can Harm Your Self Respect

Orbiting, at the very least annoy you and at the most, can confuse you and even harm your self respect. A lot of times, when the guy is not replying to your messages in the way that you want him to, it can be bad for your self respect. The bad side of all these dating trends like benching, ghosting, bread crumbing is that if you are on the receiving end, you can really suffer. You can start to blame yourself that there is perhaps, something wrong with you because of which the person is not giving you the commitment that you need. You have better things to do than suffer blows to your ego day in and day out. Which is why if you have an orbiter in your life, run!

The bad side of all these dating trends like benching, ghosting, bread crumbing is that if you are on the receiving end, you can really suffer. You can start to blame yourself that there is perhaps, something wrong with you because of which the person is not giving you the commitment that you need.

The best way to tackle orbiting is to not let this person bother you. You can do it two ways: You can either be upfront and tell them that you don't understand this behavior. But know that this person will instantly feel powerful when you let them know that you have the kind of hold over them that you do. So, don't give them the satisfaction. Another thing you can do is block them on social media, which is perhaps a bit more doable and even practical. That's what the blocking features are for, after all, to keep away from people who you don't want to be bothered by. And last but not the least, try to not let this person get over your nerves, because if you do, he will come back to haunt you in the future.

Why People Orbit Their Exes

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