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Patti Stanger dating tips

Updated on June 15, 2012

If you could share five tough dating rules that everyone should live by, what would they be?

1) TMI – too much information.

TMI is horrible. We’ve all experienced the person that told us everything about their last failed relationship or marriage which is entirely inappropriate for when you are just meeting someone. Don’t go on and on about the last person who broke your heart. Also included in this category is sharing information about psychological or family structure problems that affect you as an adult.

2) Two-drink maximum. Women tend to share too much information when they drink too much, and then the guy gets scared…and they are no longer dating.

I understand having liquid courage to loosen up and relax due to the fact first dates can be awkward. It is not cool for your date to smell alcohol on your breathe when you first meet for your date. It is also not cool to drink too many cocktails as one can tend to have inappropriate conversation, relax your manners way too much, speak about personal issues, or discuss how upset you are that you are not married. You don’t want to awaken your drinking personality and most of us have one that is not a true representation of ourselves.
Comatose and become too relaxed (15%)
Wild or loose Party Girl/Guy (40%)
Swayed by emotions whether depressed or angry (20%)
Affectionate and Sensual Octopus (25%).

3) Let the man lead, and if you are the man, lead!

Either you have it or you don’t on this rule. Being the man does not include asking someone out not knowing a date, time, location, or activity. You can’t lead by placing everything on the woman to suggest or plan and claim the man title at the end of the day. Ladies must know how to be flexible and release the need to have control (because some women are control freaks) and have a good time on the date he planned.

4) No sex before monogamy is my fourth rule. Obviously, this one is a major rule. If you sleep with him too soon, you may feel like you are in love, even if he is a loser.

Best example of this was an episode of Millionaire Matchmaker with Zargos and Teal. Patti ripped her a new one and made her cry but she was right. When Teal revealed that the sex was bad between her and Zargos, Patti told her why. Having sex too soon can result in you not being comfortable with this person or connected to that person so it makes the sex bad. Her second mistake was mentioning other things he might do for her (presentation of a gold digger) which placed her in a bad light. Patti reminded her that condoms are not full proof and you can still get infections. She made it clear how reckless her behavior was regarding the decision she made.

My thoughts is when you are clearly looking for a long term relationship and you jump in the bed right away you are either (1) Thinking sex will seal the deal or (2) You are a gold-digger thinking that you will get even more trinkets/vacations/or money from this person. The problem with that mentality - you just played your trump card for one display so if he’s shopping he’s had your experience and can put you in his back pocket and still shop for something different. The second problem is that most men of quality won’t be sucked in by gold-digging ways and sometimes men test you to see what type of quality woman you are and if he can get your jewels so cheap chances is its cubic zirconia.

Many people believe sex is some way of bonding with this person and that's often not true.
*Remember: to men sex is not love; it’s an activity of pleasure and release.


5) My last rule would probably be that if you’re dating, but nothing is working for you, don’t fret. The right man or woman is probably just around the corner. It’s usually those down times that you have to give in to. Once you give in to it, the phone will start ringing. I learned that lesson the hard way.

Or, if you’re still in doubt, refer to what the matchmaker often says, “It’s all in the kiss!”
It is all in the kiss. Passion, I like you, I love you, I feel you can all be felt in a kiss.
Continue to take dating tips, improve yourself, and keep smiling……………..your soul mate is just around the corner.


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