Perpetuation of Truth
The truth will continue to be truth, but lies remain only until the truth is revealed.
There are so many perspectives in life that it has become like a never ending river complete with the fluidity, and the variables. So much of life depends on sound perspectives that even the trust we have for our significant others depend on a sound understanding of the things that occur in our time. Follow me as I explore integrity, trust and love, forgiveness, and the perpetuation of truth.
Take two apples one red, and one yellow. Select two individuals and without looking at the apples show the red one to one person and the yellow to the other. Now ask the individuals to share what the color of the apple was. You now pose the question of integrity. Either one of the two individuals you selected may untruthfully reveal that their apple was another color. We will un-doubtfully, forever question the validity of the responses from either candidate. Without the intervention of a logical device such as a camera or video recording device or similar logic device there is not solid proof that either is lying, or telling the truth. We only know that we have two perspectives and either one is true, one is false, both are true, or both are false. A psychologist or law enforcement may enter the question of motive. What motive does either party have for lying? However; illogical beings require no motive for action. Motivation may in fact be internal, and an individual may act without any outside stimulus. An individual perspective is illogically (emotionally) defined, and cannot be therefore proven. For this reason we need a jury in a case trial. It is often said that majority rules, but is majority always right? Why do I pose the question? Why do I question the honesty of mankind in this way? I pose this question because majority is not always right; because Integrity is missing from many areas of our culture, an area needed to build trust.
What is trust but a fragile barrier that separates perspectives: truth from lies, and fact from fiction? Our naming conventions, language, culture, even our laws are based on the perspective of our ancestors, and their ancestors. How fragile is our understanding of what makes us who we are? Yet we put our trust in the perspectives of those who preceded us in our world. Relationships over the years have long been built off of a bond of trust, and love. Yet we haven’t found a way to trust our spouses the way we place trust in our ancestors… unquestioningly. I ask what is trust, what is love? How can we build something strong off of something so fragile? It takes years to build trust for someone and mere seconds to destroy it. Trust in itself is often responsible for sustaining the emotion we call love. Love is often misidentified as an emotion, or feeling that we have for another. Love is in fact not a feeling but a state of being that one enters into, in relation to another being. Love is unchanging and unconditional, and sustained individually. We can’t Love another without first understanding that Love has to become a part of who we are. With this understanding of Love; how do we define the emotion that we often call love? How does someone fall in love and then out of love for someone? Let us dive deeper. Emotions are conditional, and are often fed. Once the nourishment that sustained that emotion dissipates, so does the emotion. This causes the fluctuation of the “In love out of love,” syndrome. On the other hand true Love in itself is not the answer to a healthy relationship. True Love in its unconditional nature is only the foundation for a bond; it is not the bond itself. What about trust? Is trust enough to keep a relationship together? Well; as fragile as trust is it can only nurture the building of a bond but not sustain the bond itself. The catalyst that keeps a relationship going, briefly identified earlier, is integrity. Integrity is defined as the quality or state of being complete or undivided (Webster Dictionary). Most relationships lack integrity which is an individual trait. Since most relationships focus on the comingling of two people, integrity is often overlooked. Without integrity trust cannot be maintained, and though the foundation of True love may be strong, the bond won’t exist. True Love is often being confused with the emotional equivalent. When this happens the bond is built on an unstable foundation, the foundation breaks, and the bond breaks. Integrity, True Love (unconditional), and Trust are responsible for building and maintaining a healthy relationship. Remove either, and the relationship either won’t start, or will start and fail. Every relationship needs maintenance. Picture an automobile receiving an oil change to keep things lubricated and flowing smoothly. Relationships build up a lot of gunk in the engine of integrity, trust, and Love. When the viscosity breaks down, things don’t run smoothly. There is no way to eliminate the buildup of gunk from ever happening; it is something we have to deal with. So I turn to a maintenance process which I like refer to as Forgiveness.
Forgiveness is not blind, nor forgetful. Forgiveness is for self and not for the other parties involved. Forgiveness is the art of retracting judgment to free one’s self from mental bondage. Forgiveness is not a free ticket from consequence. When God forgives He never says you won’t be punished. For every action is an equal and opposite reaction, and people must learn from the past or be doomed to repeat it. So why then should a person feel that forgiveness is an opportunity to revert, or go back into a situation expecting to carry on as if it never happened? The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over expecting a different result, each time. Forgiveness is like a selfless act of chance. Forgiveness is not foolish, but acting on emotion is. I relate sanity to knowing and expecting the result, and utilizing that knowledge for positive reinforcement. Things change, and change even more after forgiveness. If two people can positively accept this change then they may move on together in peace. Rekindling friendship is possible but not guaranteed. However; forgiveness opens the door of opportunity to give the other a chance at continuing to be in your life in some way. Forgiveness is hard work, but when learned masterfully can strengthen our understanding of self, and thus builds integrity. Integrity is rooted in truth, which reinforces trust.
Truth will continue to be truth but lies remain only until the truth is revealed.
Following the analogy of car maintenance, if forgiveness is an oil change then truth is the oil and lies are the gunk buildup. To perpetuate truth is like adding an oil additive. After you’ve forgiven someone it is important for both parties involved to be ever honest. People are not a hundred percent honest, so being lie free is clearly impossible for mankind with our flaws. However; the more truth we pump into our relationships, the less gunk we have to clean out (forgive). Telling the truth regardless of its self impact is both challenging, and dangerous territory. Building this level of integrity must be started early, and maintained. Before making a decision about doing something it is wise to sit back and assess the consequences. Ask yourself; can I tell my spouse, friend, or family member what I am doing or have done? Is it something that would require me to lie to them about? If the answer is no I can’t tell them and yes I have to lie, then it may be best not to do it. Easier said than done right? In the case where it is more difficult, and the consequence is dire, it is recommended that the truth be told regardless. Decisions made that negatively affect you personally are better honestly revealed early than dishonestly revealed later. Think of a “now and later” candy that is sweet now, and sour later. Give people time to heal from the mistakes, and allow them to forgive you.
Lies when revealed later can explode into events that do way more harm to a person’s credibility, than the truth revealed early. A person who begins the perpetuation of truth in his or her life will find that others trust them more, and there words are less likely to be questioned. The perpetuation of truth in one’s life is the beginning stages of learning who you are, and the process of completing one’s self.