ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel
  • »
  • Gender and Relationships»
  • Advice & Tips for Women in Relationships

Quotes About Men

Updated on July 6, 2017


Hello again everyone.

Here some quotes I found along my journey browsed many webs. These are about Man. Most of it very funny, but maybe some a little not nice. So I should say, I'm so sorry first to all of men who read this. I just want to share the laugh with you all and never have any bad intention at all. So, please forgive me.

Enjoy!


"Men are simple things. They can survive a whole weekend with only three things: beer, boxer shorts and batteries for the remote control.."

Diana Jordan.


"If you never want to see a man again say, 'I love you, I want to marry you, I want to have children'. They leave skid marks."

Rita Rudner


As long as you know most men are like children, you know everything.

CoCo Chanel


I am cuter than you, right babe?
I am cuter than you, right babe?


"There are three stages of man: He believes in Santa Claus; he doesn't believe in Santa Claus; he is Santa Claus."

Bob Philips

HO HO HO! Do I look like Santa already? Ok, who I need to be fool?
HO HO HO! Do I look like Santa already? Ok, who I need to be fool?


"Women love men for their defects; if men have enough of them women will forgive them everything, even their gigantic intellects."

Oscar Wilde


I am BIG! Are you still doubting me?
I am BIG! Are you still doubting me?


"Men do not like to admit to even momentary imperfection. My husband forgot the code to turn off the alarm. When the police came, he wouldn't admit he'd forgotten the code...he turned himself in."

Rita Rudner


I am the best!
I am the best!


When a man of 40 falls in love with a girl of 20, it isn't her youth he is seeking but his own.

Lenore Coffee

Ups!
Ups!


Men are a luxury, not a necessity

Cher


Luxury indeed!
Luxury indeed!


The only time a woman really succeeds in changing a man is when he's a baby.

Natalie Wood


Rock on, dude!
Rock on, dude!


Don't accept rides from strange men, and remember that all men are strange.

Robin Morgan

If the strange man look like this, woman will still love him :p
If the strange man look like this, woman will still love him :p


Is there a cure for a broken heart? Only time can heal your broken heart, just as time can heal his broken arms and legs.

Miss Piggy


Save yourself! She is angry! LOL
Save yourself! She is angry! LOL


Men are creatures with eight hands.

Jane Mansfield


HAND'S UP!
HAND'S UP!


When a man brings his wife flowers for no reason, there's a reason.

Molly McGee


O ow!
O ow!


I'm such a good lover because I practice a lot on my own.

Woody Allen


Hmmmm???
Hmmmm???


What women want: To be loved, to be listened to, to be desired, to be respected, to be needed, to be trusted, and sometimes, just to be held. What men want: Tickets to the World Series.

Dave Barry

Hei, guys! Let's playing!
Hei, guys! Let's playing!


Man has will, but woman has her way.

Oliver Wendell Holmes

Woman's rule!
Woman's rule!


Every time a woman leaves off something she looks better, but every time a

man leaves off something he looks worse.

Will Rogers


Sssst! Please, don't tell my wife!
Sssst! Please, don't tell my wife!


If men can run the world, why can't they stop wearing neckties? How intelligent is it to start the day by tying a little noose around your neck?

Linda Ellerbee


Am I look good with this necktie?
Am I look good with this necktie?


You see a lot of smart guys with dumb women, but you hardly ever see a smart woman with a dumb guy.

Erica Jong

Whoops!
Whoops!


Show me a sane man and I will cure him for you.

Carl Gustav Jung


Comments

Submit a Comment

  • Freya Cesare profile image
    Author

    Freya Cesare 6 years ago from Borneo Island, Indonesia

    Thank you, dear. ^^

  • profile image

    janellelk 6 years ago

    Oh man, this was pretty great!

  • Freya Cesare profile image
    Author

    Freya Cesare 6 years ago from Borneo Island, Indonesia

    Hello, NJ. That final pic is gift for our health, big and great laugh. ^_^ I'm glad you like it. Thanks.

  • NJ's Ponderings profile image

    NJ's Ponderings 6 years ago from Hickville, NY

    Voted up and funny! And that ending picture? Oh my! LOL

  • Freya Cesare profile image
    Author

    Freya Cesare 6 years ago from Borneo Island, Indonesia

    Yes. I'm glad you like it. ^^

  • Ingenira profile image

    Ingenira 6 years ago

    LOL... These are so funny !

  • Freya Cesare profile image
    Author

    Freya Cesare 7 years ago from Borneo Island, Indonesia

    I'm glad you like it, Carrie, because it is really hard for me to finally able to fitted all quote with it's pic. @.@ Hehehe... Thank you, dear.

  • carrie450 profile image

    carrie450 7 years ago from Winnipeg, Canada

    Hilarious Freya. I just love the graphics also. LoL

  • Freya Cesare profile image
    Author

    Freya Cesare 7 years ago from Borneo Island, Indonesia

    Yes, Isn't it. I am glad I make you laugh. :) Thank you.

  • profile image

    Matt 7 years ago

    Haha, the quotes are funny. Still they teach us a lesson..

  • Freya Cesare profile image
    Author

    Freya Cesare 7 years ago from Borneo Island, Indonesia

    Saddlerider1, Hello, Sir.

    So it is true then? Aaaaah... where I can found a man who do not have those behaviors above? So sad. :(

    Well, unless I know the truth and I will used it for my own benefit. LOL.

    Thank you for reading this, Sir.

  • saddlerider1 profile image

    saddlerider1 7 years ago

    Great pictures, a great selection. But you found out a lot about men, I never knew I would be discovered:9)) too funny. Fun hub.

  • Freya Cesare profile image
    Author

    Freya Cesare 7 years ago from Borneo Island, Indonesia

    I tried my best to made them fit the quotes. I am glad it is work. Thank you, Agusfanani. :)

  • agusfanani profile image

    agusfanani 7 years ago from Indonesia

    They are all very funny pictures !

  • Freya Cesare profile image
    Author

    Freya Cesare 7 years ago from Borneo Island, Indonesia

    Sa'ge, very true! Human indeed such funny creatures! We are changing, adapting, moving, and if we can't do all that, we will denying, frustrating or being angry to the world. It sound really natural, but somehow many of the acts that caused by it very ridiculous and out of the logic context, and they even didn't realized it.

    About women, I guess this is an adapting part came out and speak. Taught by experiences changing people (women in this case) inside, and turned her became another predator for that one thing also. So sad but that's is the fact in this world today, which I really do not like to see. :(

    Well, let just see a good side of it, which is; it gave us more subject to laugh about! ^_^ Thank you, Sa'ge. I will visit you, soon.

  • Sa`ge profile image

    Sa`ge 7 years ago from Barefoot Island

    I loved this one Freya. so right you are. My dad used to say to us girls, "all men are animals and only want one thing", I wonder if all women have become animals also, since so many today seem to want only one thing also. they have truly become equals. Humans are such funny creatures. LOL and so much in denial! I did not say any of the above! LOL :D ~aloha~

  • Freya Cesare profile image
    Author

    Freya Cesare 7 years ago from Borneo Island, Indonesia

    Thank you, Seraphim. Your laugh is my happiness. ;)

  • profile image

    seraphim11 7 years ago

    "as long as you know most men are like children, you know everything." lol I love this whole hub! Great and funny :)

  • Freya Cesare profile image
    Author

    Freya Cesare 7 years ago from Borneo Island, Indonesia

    I glad you like it, Leptirela. It is always good for laugh. ^^ Thank you.

  • Leptirela profile image

    Leptirela 7 years ago from I don't know half the time

    hahahhaha,,,,,,, GREAT HUB =)) hUMOROUS in Fact

  • Freya Cesare profile image
    Author

    Freya Cesare 7 years ago from Borneo Island, Indonesia

    Thank you for reading this, James. ^_^

  • James A Watkins profile image

    James A Watkins 7 years ago from Chicago

    These are very funny jokes. I enjoyed reading them. Thank you!

  • Freya Cesare profile image
    Author

    Freya Cesare 7 years ago from Borneo Island, Indonesia

    Thank you. I'm glad you like it. \^o^/

  • Om Paramapoonya profile image

    Om Paramapoonya 7 years ago

    LOL...great quotes and hilarious pics. Thumbs up! :)

  • Freya Cesare profile image
    Author

    Freya Cesare 7 years ago from Borneo Island, Indonesia

    Ah! Are you sure, Carolina? I don't think men really these bad, but..... what do I know, I am not man. LOL.

    Thank you for visiting me, Carolina. ^_^

  • carolina muscle profile image

    carolina muscle 7 years ago from Charlotte, North Carolina

    LOL!! Oh Freya.. I think you figured us out! :-)

  • Freya Cesare profile image
    Author

    Freya Cesare 7 years ago from Borneo Island, Indonesia

    Micky : Hahaha.... Brave man!

    Mrpopo : thank you. :)

  • mrpopo profile image

    mrpopo 7 years ago from Canada

    Hah, I love that Rita Rudner quote.

    I'll admit it though, I am a furniture-based leisure prioritizer.

    Great Hub, thumbs up!

  • Micky Dee profile image

    Micky Dee 7 years ago

    "Don't accept rides from strange men, and remember that all men are strange." Hey! Okay- maybe you're right.

  • Freya Cesare profile image
    Author

    Freya Cesare 7 years ago from Borneo Island, Indonesia

    Hello Blake4d, are you really serious want use that quote as your xmas card? Lol.

    Well, Anna Nicole Smith have to be praised for her braveness to be with her chosen husband, no matter what her reason is. ^_^

    thank you for reading this and thank you for your thoughtful comment, Blak4d.

    I hope you have wonderful day. ^_^

  • blake4d profile image

    Blake Ford Hall 7 years ago from Now Rising Out of Phoenix Arizona Earthlings

    "There are three stages of man: He believes in Santa Claus; he doesn't believe in Santa Claus; he is Santa Claus."

    Wow this is going to be a quote on my next internet xmas card. Hub praises Freya, for a list of cool reasons. Number one, the first hub to ever include Homer simpson, Mr. Bean and Woody Allen simultaneously. Secondly for respectfully including Anna Nicole Smith, RIP to an American icon, and media Goddess. Not for her talent, but for lack of it she still rose to historical notworthy status in our US history as a modern woman. XOXO.

    Keep on Hubbing FC. Blake4d