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Questions to Ask Your Fiance Before You Get Married

Updated on February 8, 2018
katleigh profile image

Katleigh is a college student and loves time management, personal finance, video games, and writing about their college experiences.

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There are so many wonderful things to look forward to when you’re engaged - a beautiful wedding, a luxurious honeymoon, and happily spending the rest of your life together in wedded bliss. But before all that, you and your partner need to have some very important conversations. Marriage isn’t always moonlight beaches and rose bouquets. There are lots of things you and your potential spouse need to talk about before the big day rolls around. The following questions will give you and your fiance a more honest picture of what to expect before you get married.

Money

  • Do you follow a budget? If you don't, are you willing to make and follow one?

  • Do you have an emergency fund? If you do, how much is in it?

  • Are you currently saving for retirement? Is it through an IRA or your own investment vehicle? How much a month are you saving?
  • Do you plan on combining all of your income or are you going to simply split the bills? How important is it for you that your money is your money?
  • How much money do you spend a month on your appearance? This includes hair, nails, makeup, and clothing.
  • Do you believe in tithing and/or regular charitable giving? If so, what percentage of your income do you give?

Career

  • When are you planning to retire? What steps are you taking to meet that goal?
  • Do you plan to get promoted or change jobs, or would you like to stick to your current profession?
  • Would it bother you if your spouse made significantly more or less money than you?
  • Would it bother you if your spouse had significantly more or less education than you?
  • Would you move across the country if your job required you to? Would you be willing to be separated from your spouse in order to do that?

Whether or not to have children and how to treat them are an important part of any marriage.
Whether or not to have children and how to treat them are an important part of any marriage. | Source

Family

  • Are you expected to take care of your aging parents? What kind of care are you going to provide?

  • Do you want children? Are you going to adopt, foster, or have your own kids?

  • If you do have children, are you going to pay for their college education?

  • If you do have children, would you want them to attend public or private school? What about a religious school?

  • How often will you be expected to attend regular family gatherings like Christmas, birthdays, reunions, or other celebrations?

Religion and Spirituality

  • What is your religious affiliation? How important is that to you? Is it important that your spouse have similar views?
  • If we had children, would you want your children to be raised with your religious viewpoints? Would you rather have them raised in a secular background even if you are religious?

© 2018 Katleigh Merrier

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    • katleigh profile imageAUTHOR

      Katleigh Merrier 

      6 months ago from Georgia, United States

      Thank you so much!

    • katleigh profile imageAUTHOR

      Katleigh Merrier 

      6 months ago from Georgia, United States

      That's important too! Hopefully, you don't plan to jump into a marriage, it is one of the most important choices you can make. But if you don't have any of the same goals or ideas about the way you want to live your life, it might be important to re-evaluate your relationship.

    • Dr Billy Kidd profile image

      Dr Billy Kidd 

      7 months ago from Sydney, Australia

      Well done!

    • dashingscorpio profile image

      dashingscorpio 

      7 months ago

      These are also good questions to ask BEFORE you decide to become an "exclusive couple" prior to engagement.

      However there's always one caveat - Are they being honest?

      If someone is "into you" they'll generally try to avoid "blowing it" at all costs and sometimes that means telling you what they think (you) want to hear. Also people (change) or evolve over time.

      While it's great to ask questions it would be foolish to rely solely on their responses. Observation over the course of lengthy courtship 1 1/2+ years should you give a good idea.

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