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Questions to ask on a first date if you're looking to meet your true match

Updated on August 30, 2012
Take your time to get to know someone.
Take your time to get to know someone. | Source

Looking for the right relationship? Here are a few good questions for you on a first date.

You can not go forward into a relationship if you don't ask a few questions, and I don't mean, "boxers, or briefs?"

Here are a few tips to start you out with your search for "Mr." or "Ms. Right."

1. Are you completely single?
Don't laugh: a lot of people put on the facade that they are available. Ask for proof if you have to (divorce decree).
2. Are you sure of your sexual preference? Don't laugh more: you'd be shocked how many people are living in denial out there! Look, embrace what you are. I don't want to find out decades later you swing the "other" way.
3. What is your true dating status? There is a lot of gray matter here. For a general rule: it's best to avoid anyone who hasn't been divorced for at least a year post-decree. Separated? Pass! Too much of a risk for reconciliation or drama issues. Plus, most of us need at least a year to readjust to being single again.
4. How do you feel about doing drugs?
This is not a question for prudes. You have a preference either way, just make sure your date sees things similarly as you.
5. If there was one thing you could change about yourself, what would it be? If the answer is "nothing," run for the hills! We all could use improvement, it just takes an honest person to see that. The answer to this question will give you the best idea of a person's quest to grow, and what they value about self-development.
6. Who do you worship?
If you would say "Christ," and your suitor says, "Satan!" Run! Run fast, run hard, run deep! And don't look back.
7. Do you have kids, and how do you feel about them?
Deadbeat dad? Run some more! Thinks kids are annoying and not in his future when you plan on a big family? I don't need to read the Tarot cards to tell you that "I see doom in your future." That is, assuming you have kids, or plan to have them in your future.
8. Do you have a criminal record?
This didn't seem important to me until an ex-con came into my home, rocked my world, then took off with my life savings the next morning. OK so Thelma and Louise was based on true situations.... but I digress. If you don't mind dating a guy on the "Megan's Law" website, it's probably best you investigate. Pay the fee if you have to, but don't jeopardize your life or your future with some psycho.
9. What are your plans for the future?
This includes any plans for relationships, by the way. You want to find out early on if you are both on the same page. If you want a long term relationship, and your suitor says something vague like, "I like to play things by the ear," then assume this translation: "I'm a flake, and I don't take anything seriously. If I see a molecule of doubt on you, I will drop kick you and do the fade-away break-up." Or something along those lines.
10. What is your relationship with your family?
Only sign up for a relationship with a guy who says, "my family is bat-sh*t crazy, and I want nothing to do with them!" Otherwise, he's lying. Just kidding. Most families (if they're completely honest) are somehow dysfunctional. Look, the right answer is probably a middle ground where he can say, "they're not perfect, but they're my family and I love them." That is tantamount to any relationship, too, wouldn't you say?

Oh, and one last thing: if you meet someone who seems to be a "Momma's Boy," or "Daddy's little girl." Run!!! Run like there's no tomorrow. No one can take the place of an unrealistic ideal. Even their own mothers and fathers are freaks, so do you want to be like that? I didn't think so.

Any other suggestions for questions? I'm curious for what others see fit to ask.

Have fun, and don't take anything too seriously!
Have fun, and don't take anything too seriously!

What is most important to find compatibility?

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