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Spousal rape

Updated on April 20, 2012

No means no.

Did you know many men rape their wives and girlfriends unknowingly? Forcing yourself on your wife of girlfriend falls under rape because she did not want to have sex with you but you forced yourself on her.

I was watching a talk show, they were talking about rape, pointed out that a large percentage of men have raped in their lives but unknowingly. By forcing themselves onto their wives or girlfriends just because some is your wife or girlfriend it does not mean that, you have the right to force yourself on to them when they said no, baby not tonight.

Most women are unaware that they are being raped by their spouses because they think that is it his right to do so because you are his wife. No still means no even when you are married or dating. So just because I am your wife and tonight I don’t feel like getting intimate with you gives you the right to force yourself on me, no it doesn’t it means you need to respect that tonight I am not up to it and it doesn’t mean that I don’t love when I say no.

Went on the internet and found an article about a survey that was conducted by Diana Russell (a prominent rape researcher). She found that out of the 900 random women selected to take the survey their husbands had raped about 8% and about 14% of married women have reported either a completed or an attempted rape by their husbands or ex-husbands. (source

Just because he is your husband it does not mean that he is allowed to sexually abuse you.


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    • moiponetsoka profile imageAUTHOR


      6 years ago from South Africa

      Yes its true people are still ignoring the situation and I am happy for you that you finally left him and that you are happy again.

    • profile image

      Forgotten Artist 

      6 years ago

      My ex husband did this. There was not one single time in our 7 years of marriage that I wanted him to do any of the things he did. I married him because of very complicated career obligations, and feel like I served as a whore for 7 years. I got very good at smiling and playing the loving wife, but finally, he was insufferable in every area of life, and I had to leave. I was so afraid of intimacy that when I married again, I was shocked to discover it could be a good part of a happy relationship.

      Thank you for writing this. People are afraid to admit or do not want to talk about the face that a woman's body is still her own no matter her relationship status. "I don't want to," or, "I am not in the mood," or, "Another time," means, "No." Ignoring that "No" is a violation of the woman's body and consequently, the relationship.


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