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Real Life Homosexuals

Updated on September 10, 2009


The more I live the more I realize that homosexuals are exactly what the stereotypes portray and at the same time have nothing to do with the homosexual stereotype. How can this be true? Because the more homosexuals become comfortable with who they are and society does too, what you discover is that just like every other person on this planet, no two are alike but sometimes they have a lot of similarities with the group they associate with the most. So, in an effort to break through what has long been a problem for us gays of being seen only as boa wearing, float riding, queens all the while defining ourselves with such limited views and terminology such as “Twinks” (boys), “Bears” (furry bigger men), etc. perhaps it’s time for us all to break through a bunch of false categories and become real life homosexuals – Don’t Get Me Started! carried a story yesterday stating, “Gay Latino Americans Are Coming Of Age” now while some may applaud CNN for carrying this story, once I began to read the article about how Perez Hilton is a Latino Pioneer I threw up in my mouth a little and stopped reading. Sure Perez Hilton gets a lot of press but please, let’s not for one minute forget how he got to where he is today. Perez Hilton began as an actor who wasn’t good enough to get any work, started outing gay actors who were working and then advanced to drawing cumshots on celebrities on a website where every other bitter non-celebrity could laugh together at someone that they could and would never be, someone with a real career. Kudos to him for continuing to push the envelope, his waistline and the color anyone’s hair should be in order to create a niche for himself that now allows him to be a sorta famous person but at what expense to the gay and Latino communities? (By the way he changed his name to sound more Hollywood and less Latino from Mario Lavandeira, Jr. to Perez Hilton so I’m sure the Latino community isn’t doing back flips of excitement about him being considered a “Latino Pioneer” either.) Amazingly enough, Perez Hilton is like a cockroach who will not die, only the other day he was on the Tyra Banks show. She had him on to dispel some of the crap written about her as she decided to go sans weave to show her real hair. In the segment with Hilton she asked him if he would please not go after children of celebrities who were under 18 years of age. Hilton balked originally but after much back and forth, Tyra made her deal with the devil that he would stop drawing on, making fun of and exploiting celebrity children for six months if Tyra would put him on an episode of America’s Next Top Model. This reprehensible human being does not represent the gay community in any way. Oh sure, he’s gay but we’d gladly trade him and Lance Bass in for Cagney and Lacey! (To see my vblog about why I don’t want Perez Hilton to be the face of gay America, click here -

But enough about Hilton and on to the issue at hand. I’m tired of hearing about “Downlow Black Gays” or “Latino Gays Coming of Age” – isn’t it time that we all realize that gays are just as dull and/or as fascinating as straights and while we can also be defined by our religious and ethnic backgrounds as well as our sexuality, the gays who are really breaking ground are the real life homosexuals who every day live their lives with dignity and honor. They go to work, they help in their community and often times they don’t even have a rainbow flag in front of their house. (Can you imagine???) I’ve always considered myself a “garden variety gay” as I’m not all that flashy (except when I need to be), I’ve been with the same man in a monogamous relationship forever and I don’t try to hide nor flaunt my gayness at work or in most social situations. I prefer to be myself as opposed to someone who has a pink triangle on his computer monitor at work and rubber bracelet around my wrist that’s engraved with “equality now.” If you need those things to feel better about yourself then by all means have at it but more and more there are more of me out there than you (And thank GOD!). There are a lot of us gays who have discovered that we don’t have to be a stereotype just because we’re gay, we don’t have to wear assless leather chaps or any of the other thousands of perceptions that people people themselves have about the homosexual lifestyle. We can be ourselves and my hope for those gays out there like the flamboyant Hilton, downlow gays, etc. is that they would spend more time working on accepting themselves so that they would be more enjoyable to be around and therefore would gain much more acceptance for themselves and by others. Enough of the affected lisping, “Girl, no you didn’t” type of persona, try being yourself for a little bit boys and girls and I think you’ll be pleasantly surprised. So here’s my message to all gays, “Stop being what you think gay is and be a real life homosexual (for all our sakes).” Real life homosexuals – Don’t Get Me Started!

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    • Literature Fairy profile image

      Holly Jackson 7 years ago from England, UK.

      Hi! I really enjoyed your hub, I have to say out of all of the gay people I have ever met (which is quite a few) there's only ever been one or two whom in my eyes conform to the stereotype of 'flamboyant' the rest of them are just normal average people. I always thought that the stereotype of gay men as 'boa wearing, float riding, queens' as you put it (lol) and gay women as butch & crew-cut was just what the general population saw a few small idiosyncrasies and blew them way up out of proportion. Because giving people labels & putting people in pigeon holes makes them easier to deal with, and people have always feared what they don't understand!

      Really enjoyed this hub! LF x