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Rekindle Romance, Reignite Passion with A-Z Relationship Glue Recipes
Relationship Glue Recipes from A-Z
Let's talk relationships and marriage. Does yours sizzle? Or has the romance fizzed? My husband and I celebrated our 27th wedding anniversary in July. While life's not always the Garden of Eden, we're very happy (and really, who'd want to live in a garden 24-7--bugs, snakes, no indoor plumbing--but I digress). Anyway, here are our best relationship glue recipes, from A to Z.
Relationship Glue Recipes A-L: The Do's
A--appreciate. Take each other for better and worse, but never for granted. Find daily opportunities to grow closer.
B--budget time and money. Money troubles can cause untold problems in marriages. Keep spending in check. Actively budget time to be together, don't just passively wait for it to happen.
C-Communicate. Too much arguing caused 56% of divorces, says MSN Living. http://living.msn.com/love-relationships/the-8-most-common-reasons-for-divorce#2 Maybe you argue--it happens. Learn to fight fair and choose your battles. Maybe you don't fight. But you also don't talk. Not good. You need to reopen communication lines. You don't have to (shouldn't) always discuss heavy stuff. Laugh and chatter together.
D-date. My husband and I work opposite shifts, him 6-7 nights a week. We could write a book on crazy schedules. But since we started making dates priority, we get along better.
E-entertainment (shared). So you don't like the same books, movies, venues? Find activities you both enjoy. We discovered a shared passion for art exhibits, museums and opera.
F-forgive and forget. A lot. Grudges kill relationships. Unless there's ongoing hurt, just air and move on.
G-give of yourselves. Take an interest in each other. Support and champion each other's causes.
H-hug, embrace, cuddle. You get the picture.
I-intimacy. Is your sex life on the back burner? I hear you--only sleeping together a few nights a month is a really joy-kill. So we enjoy what time we have.
J--juggle. Most couples are basically functional, but drift apart because they let things come between them. Rearrange your schedule to include together-time, walks, meals, talk time.
K--kids and boundaries. Whilst children are the fruit of your relationship, they're also obstacles, sometimes. Love them with all your heart, but don't let them control you.
L--listen. More than talk. Identify with and affirm each other.
M--mature. Grow up. Leave off childish, petty, competitive behavior.
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Relationship Glue Recipes M-Z: The Don'ts
N--never, ever cheat. Humans are naturally jealous and exclusive to one mate. Run screaming from affairs, flirtations. Be wary of opposite-sex friendships. They can go from friend to lover fast if there's marital strife. That includes cybercheating--maybe the creepiest of all.
O--other people (keep them in their place). A marriage is between two people and doesn't include family, parents, friends, even children.
P--pay it forward. He said, she said--get off the merry-go-round. Apologize. Oh, and spouse will be more likely to reciprocate with the mea culpaes if you don't expect them.
Q--quit being selfish. Like a three-legged race. relationships only work if you cooperate.
R--resist temptation: to spite, laziness, irritability, ignoring each other.
S--socialize sparingly with outsiders, mostly as a couple. Don't spend more time with friends than each other--could be you're just avoiding one another. Discover togetherness and guard it.
T--things (own them, don't let them own you). Sometimes the "other woman" is his truck, the "other man" her house.
U--unplug smartphone, internet when you're together. Constantly chatting with others sends the message that they're more important than him. That Facebook "friends" come before her.
V--volunteer together. Give. Don't just ruthlessly acquire. Accumulation of wealth will tear you apart.
W--work less. Relax more.
X--cross out your need to have the last word.
Y--yield control. Surrender your need to orchestrate everything and everyone. Share and balance power.
Z--zip lips. You can't unsay words so think before you speak. Sometimes, as nice and tolerant as I am to others, I'm equally nasty and intolerant of my spouse. Be friends and allies.
Keep romance embers alight or rekindle burned out ones with these easy tips.