- Gender and Relationships
Relationships: How to Transition From Being an Employed Wife to a Stay at Home Wife
Relationships :How to transition from being an employed wife to a stay at home wife
These days more women are pursuing their careers while still being married. This is a good thing seeing that the cost of living has gone up and the bills keep increasing making it hard for the man of the house to foot the bills alone. The working woman comes in to help with the paying of the bills whenever she can. It is also good to note that men prefer a working woman when looking for one to date rather than one who doesn’t have any source of income. A working woman comes across as independent, a character that is highly appreciated by the opposite sex.
When a woman ,whether with kids or not gets married, she can find herself in a situation which she may feel require her to quit her job or put a hold in her career to become a full time stay-at-home wife. The following are some of the reasons that may lead to a woman becoming a stay-at-home wife.
Pregnancy may influence the decision to leave work to stay at home. This is especially seen in women with very demanding jobs that are strenuous. Pregnancy is a journey that requires some if not all women to take some more free time during and after pregnancy and if the job does not offer the freedom, a woman may be inclined to quit her job.
When she or one of her family members, particularly the husband or child falls ill and requires specialized care, the woman may be forced to quit her job to take care of the sick person, instead of hiring someone to do it.
3. Decision between her husband and herself
This decision may be reached by both of them especially if they have children .Here, the woman takes the responsibility of bringing up the children while her husband takes care of paying the bills.
The big question now lies in the fact that once you become a stay-at-home wife, you won’t be earning money like you are used to. This means that whatever bill or cost you used to take care of you won’t be able to do so any more. Your husband will be the sole bread winner of the family. The financial independence you once enjoyed is gone and you now depend on your husband. This lack of financial freedom can bring a lot of frustrations and strain in your relationship. Believe me, I know.
The major issue is getting to ask for money from your husband. Is he supposed to give you money and let you spend how you see fit or is he supposed to wait for you to ask him for it? Are you supposed to tell him what you are using the money for or not? Should you ask him to give you money to spend on yourself, let’s say like going to the salon or not?
- The first step in transitioning is communicating with your husband. It is just like in any major decision in your relationship; the key is in communicating about your fears and worries that you may be having. It is good to have a serious talk with your husband before quitting your job.
- Another way to help you transition is to remember why you quit in the first place. This will help you to feel much better as you quit for your family’s welfare rather than for your own gain.
- Remind yourself that in as much as you are not contributing in the financial aspect of the relationship, you are doing so much more by taking care of the family in other ways.
- It takes time to adjust to change and so don’t be in a hurry to feel normal after quitting your job.
- Reduce your expenses. This helps in making your husband feel you are considerate of the fact that he has a lot on his table now than when you were both working.
These are some few tips to help you cope with the transitioning. Just remember it will take time before you are comfortable with your new position and it is okay to feel frustrated but do remember your husband is there for you. For those who have gone through this kind of transition, please share some of the tips that helped you cope.