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Secrets From The Guy Friend.

Updated on February 9, 2016

An Inside Source.

I have heard women say that guys just don't open up. That's not true. I have personally found it easier to communicate with men than woman. I realized the other day that most of my friends are men. I also realized that I have learned a lot more about men from guy friends than I ever have from guys I had a romantic relationship with. Men open up when they don't feel like they have to impress you or put on any fronts. This is one of the perks to so often owning the title of the "chill friend that's a girl." It's a good deal both ways. I give them advice from a woman's perspective and they help me understand the male mind a little better. Here are just a few things I thought were handy for us women to keep in mind.

Everyone Needs Affirmation.

This is an area I think everyone can improve on. I don't know why it's so hard to compliment someone. It actually makes you appear more confident and secure in yourself. Girls usually make a bigger deal out of this than guys, but it doesn't mean they don't want affirmation too. Girls will get hung up on how often their man tells them they're beautiful or get upset if they don't exclaim over their new dress, but forget to give a compliment themselves. Men need to affirm their girlfriends, but I don't think anymore than women need to affirm their boyfriends. When's the last time you told him he looked handsome in that shirt or that he was an amazing basket ball player?

I have never heard a guy complain to their woman about it. Like, "Do you think I look nice? Why didn't you say anything? Can't you tell I got a new haircut?" I have heard these types of remarks from woman. Just remember that we all equally need to be reminded that we're attractive and desirable. And it means so much more if we say it freely and willingly without being given a cue. I think a simple thing like a sincere compliment can go a long way and create a positive effect on your whole relationship. So go ahead, tell your loved one how great they are. It will most likely make them feel closer to you and express their affection more freely.

The Curse Of The Stereotype.

So many guys have expressed being frustrated by the stereotypes put on men. Everyone is a unique and original human being. Not all men are macho and like sports and wrestling. A guy that enjoys cooking and crafts should be able to feel just as masculine as the deer hunter and construction worker. It's not a competition and nobody is better than another person simply because their interests differ. Case closed.



Popular Lies.

Another thing I hear a lot is that "men only want sex." This is such a big lie. Yes, there are plenty of guys looking for just one thing, but guess what? There are plenty of women like that too. I know plenty of guys who have expressed to me that they really desire a relationship and connection with a woman. Somewhere along the line things got distorted. Women derogatorily accuse men of just wanting sex, but then use it as a means to catch them. While men are wondering why women are accusing them of this while seemingly asking for it themselves. What I'm trying to say is, both men and women are very capable of being shallow, manipulative, and unfaithful. Let's stop throwing around gender stereotypes and start owning up to our own faults as humans, all equally responsible.

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    • dashingscorpio profile image

      dashingscorpio 19 months ago

      "Men need to affirm their girlfriends, but I don't think anymore than women need to affirm their boyfriends." - Very true!

      Some women actually believe it's a sign of weakness for them to complement their man, initiate sex, or make it known he is "special".

      They ask a man for the kind of the love they are unwilling to give him.

      The game is: Don't tell him you love him until he tells you first!

      Their belief is once a guy knows how you feel about him he will become a jerk and take advantage of you. The truth is (he was already) a jerk!

      A genuine "nice guy" is not going to flip because he's desired or wanted.

      As for "attractive women" who claim they have mostly male friends there is a test to determine just how many of those guys only see you as a being a platonic friend or (sisterly).

      I'm willing to bet if she called a male friend and told him she was feeling lonely/horny and asked him to come spend the night...etc

      It would be a shock to hear how few men would tell her something like:

      "Ewe! That's nasty! You're like a sister to me!"

      On the other hand if a man called his platonic girlfriend she would not only tell him that will never happen but from then on she might distance herself knowing he has sexual desires for her.

      It was women who invented "The Friend Zone" not men.

      If you are an attractive or "hot" looking woman odds are your male friends are either ex lovers or guys who lacked the courage to hit on you and settled for friendship because that was all {you} seemed to be offering them.

      The best platonic friendships are between people who don't find each other physically attractive in the slightest.