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7 Sexual Fantasies of Men and Women Exposed

Updated on February 27, 2017
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Jenny is a girl who loves many things. She loves street foods, traveling, nature, music, cats and dogs! She's crazy about purple & writing!

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What is a sexual Fantasy?

Have you ever imagined yourself doing a sexual act with a beautiful stranger? What about being forced and overpowered by your partner in bed with reckless abandon? Have you ever fantasized about your partner watching you while you strip naked? Or does it give you more pleasure when you do the watching yourself?

These are just some of the erotic mental images that both men and women are inclined to create in their minds. Since sexuality is inherent to man, sexual fantasies are pretty normal. It is a universal phenomenon which is most common to men and women beyond the age of puberty. Although sexuality is inherent to both men and women, their sexual behavior and tendencies are not entirely the same. Men are more rigid and straightforward when it comes to their sexual behavior while women are more personal and on the romantic side. Male sexual fantasies are more adventurous and impersonal while female sexual fantasies are often centered on their partner or loved ones. According to research and studies on human sexuality, men think of sex more than women. Furthermore, male sexual fantasies are focused on certain anatomical detail while female sexual fantasies are interlaced with emotion, romance and connection.

The lingering question for men has always been "what does a woman want?"...ironically, a woman wants the same thing men want...pleasure...This hub will prove that men and women do want the same things but varies in frequency and quality...

Let's find out the most common sexual fantasies of both men and women...


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1. Dominatrix

Female: Women naturally love big and strong men. In her sexual fantasies, however, she wants these men to be submissive to her and be willing to obey her every want, needs and desires. She wants to be in control because it makes her feel adored. Since it is entirely created in her mind, she can do whatever she wants to do with her man. She can be a sex goddess being worshipped by her very own sex slave...

Male: Men naturally see themselves superior to women. Being dominant in bed is certainly very "masculine" so it is normal for them to fantasize about being in control. They are innately territorial and they want their woman to be submissive to them. Men often fantasize about taking an innocent woman on their bed and passionately making love with her. The thought about penetrating an innocent woman awakens the chivalrous nature within him and it makes his fantasy deliciously exquisite.

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2. Sexual Submission

Female: Sexual submission is the most common and popular sexual fantasy of women. As much as she wants to dominate her man, her feminine nature makes her crave for submission. She wants to be subdued and conquered by her man more than anything else. Sexual submission makes her feel wanted and secured. She wants her man to take her with hunger and desire because it makes her feel sexy and beautiful. She imagines his long fingers snaking through her hair while tilting her head back and kissing her passionately coaxing her to respond and open-up to him.

Male: Just like women, there are times when men enjoy being controlled over. He wants his woman to coax him and dominate him in bed. It tells him that she knows what she wants and it excites him to know that she will have her way to get it. Gone are the days where women carry chains and belts and tie her man to the bed...even a simple act of greeting him at the door wearing nothing but your sexy smile and tugging his necktie and pushing him to the bed, leaning on top of him is enough to make him go crazy...

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3. Role-Playing

Female: Women are fond of role-playing. They often fantasize themselves wearing a sexy and hot costume and acting out their role in front of their man. It can be a role of a nerdy student trying to impress her alpha male teacher or vice versa. No matter what role she plays it certainly will ignite her fire and excite her. As long as she receives a little spanking from her man, role-playing is surely one of the most common sexual fantasy that women want to act out in reality.

Male: Just like women, men love role-playing. I don't know why but most certainly it is because of the costumes or uniforms. Men want their women to play a role of a naughty school girl, a strict teacher, a strong policewoman, a sexy flight attendant or a daring nurse. Men are visual creatures. Anything that entices their view is certainly pleasurable for them. It is more exciting if the uniform outlines the woman's delightful curves and shows off her long slender legs...

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4. Sex with a stranger

Female: Every woman wants attention. And nothing gets better when a totally hot stranger she encounters sweeps her off her feet, taking her somewhere they can be alone and passionately making love with her not caring for what will happen next...Although women are too personal when it comes to intimacy, they still crave for attention and pleasure with no strings attached to it...The setting doesn't need to be specific...it can be in a bar, on a secluded beach, in the deep forest..anywhere as long as the experience is good. Sex with a stranger allows women to be adventurous and carefree...it makes them feel irresistible that a hot stranger wants her for his taking...

Male: It is a more masculine tendency to indulge in casual sex so it is not surprising that sex with a stranger is among the many sexual fantasies of men. Studies show that most men fantasize about women who are not known to them on a personal level. They always find women delectable at any given time and place. It is no wonder that when they meet a woman for the first time, their eyes linger on their more feminine body parts. Is her waist small? Are her hips wide? Are her breasts big enough for his taste? Are her legs long, slender and smooth? If all the answers are to his liking, then a woman is sure in for the taking...the smell of raw flesh and the unknown pleasure are enough to entice his senses...

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5. Group Sex

Female: As possessive as they are in reality, women would normally hate to share their men. But in her sexual fantasy, a woman can be really adventurous and daring. Group sex can be with another woman or it can shared with two equally handsome men. The thought that she can have two gorgeous men at her feet obeying her beck and call is deliriously pleasurable for a woman. Adding another sexy woman into the picture heightens her pleasure and allows her to explore more than she can imagine. Group sex lets her experience the best of both worlds. She can watch her man making out with the other woman while she makes herself busy with the other man. She can experience both for herself. Hearing another woman's moan of pleasure other than her own is so intoxicating, it's enough to make her hot and wet.

Male: If women can share their men with another woman, it is not the same with men. Men want to be the only male specie in the midst of sexy women. It's purely natural because men, by nature are territorial. Group sex for men means having as many women on his bed as possible. As always, he wants to display his masculinity and there's no better way to prove it than satisfying women one after another adoring and exploiting them to his heart's content. The sight of two women kissing each other and exploring their bodies, hearing their moans of pleasure will definitely drive him crazy...

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6. Voyeurism

Female: Women do fantasize about secretly being watched while she undresses or when she's doing something naughty to herself...Aside from being watched, she also likes to watch for the same reasons as men. The adrenaline rush it gives her while secretly looking at a bedroom window seeing her neighbors make out is certainly worth the fun and it excites her.

Male: Men are visual creatures; certainly, voyeurism is included on their favorite fantasies. They will really love to spy on their favorite crush after school when she changes her clothes from her bedroom window. He enjoys watching any sexual act and this is the main reason why men are into pornographic films and magazines. Similarly, men would love to sneak out and watch her sexy neighbor strip her clothes and make out with her boyfriend.

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7. Forced Sex and Elusive Woman Fantasy

Female: According to studies, being ravished and forced into sex is one of the ultimate sexual fantasy a woman craves for next to submission. In reality, however, it is something a woman never hopes to experience. Since, imagination is free and boundless, being ravished in her imagination gives a woman a different kind of experience. It allows her to get the kind of sex she secretly craves for...hot, dirty, fierce, vigorous and wild. Everything happens according to her wish and since it's only in her imagination, she never gets hurt no matter how painful or fierce the penetration may be. In her mind, she tries to protest but deep down inside, she is aching with pleasure...

Male: Men does not necessarily fantasize about being raped. Rather, they go for an elusive woman. The thought that he cannot have the woman for his taking in reality, compels him to take her in his fantasy. The more elusive the woman is, the more rewarding and pleasurable his fantasies become when he takes her. And what's good about this set-up is that he can take her as much as he wants and whenever he pleases...It can be a distant cousin or a celebrity he admires...the harder it is to claim her, the more passionate his fantasies get.

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    • GrApEwAtEr profile image

      Umer Farooq 3 years ago from Birmingham, United Kingdom

      It is quite noticeable for me in this hub that both male and female actually fantasize about being dominant. Secondly it is quite strange for me to know via this hub that normally a woman does not like to share her man with any other woman but in the world of fantasy, she would actually like to see someone sharing her man :D

      I would say a very nice hub indeed :)

    • profile image

      Beth37 3 years ago

      I don't think women fantasize about being raped at all. We might want a forceful lover. We might want to "be taken", but to even include the word "rape" in a hub on fantasy seems unwise.

      And I personally would never want to share. That's the fastest way to a broken heart/relationship.

    • purpleshadow13 profile image
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      Jennifer Gonzales 3 years ago from Manila, Philippines

      Hi Beth 37..I appreciate your thoughts on this and I personally don't fantasize about being raped either...However according to my research and if you are going to read blogs or articles with similar topic, you'll see that there's a good percentage of women who fantasize about getting raped...or ravished..or forced into sex...that's the reason why I included this on my hub in the first place..

      Of course everything is possible with our imagination...And when it comes to sex, there's just no limit to the imagination you know...

    • WiccanSage profile image

      Mackenzie Sage Wright 2 years ago

      Hi, very interesting hub. I have read that rape fantasies are common-- which I know is hard for many of us to process since it's the last thing we actually want to happen to us in reality. but the mind explores regions of the subconscious in fantasies much like in dreams. It's interesting to think about. Nice work here. I enjoyed learning.

    • purpleshadow13 profile image
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      Jennifer Gonzales 2 years ago from Manila, Philippines

      Hi Wiccan Sage, thank you for reading this hub. You are right...the mind is so powerful and the fact that rape fantasies can't hurt the person fantasizing it makes it more enjoyable...but of course no one wants to be raped for real..:)

    • Cloudlee profile image

      Cloudlee 2 years ago from Vietnam

      Interesting hub! Seduce with a stranger may be not a very bad thing

    • purpleshadow13 profile image
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      Jennifer Gonzales 2 years ago from Manila, Philippines

      Thanks for your comment Cloudlee...i think it's exciting..:)

    • lostohanababy profile image

      lostohanababy 2 years ago

      Your page was awesome and informing. It made me think of some newer ways to make my boyfriend, happier.

    • carrie Lee Night profile image

      Kept private 2 years ago from Northeast United States

      Interesting hub :) Almost too hot for me :) "blushing", Seriously though a wild and adventerous topic that was written very well. Again, I know you have heard this before, but the word raped may not be the best word to use for forceable sex because it seperates itself by being a violent crime, (regardless what the research saids the word rape is different). Anyhow, great hub voted up :)

    • purpleshadow13 profile image
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      Jennifer Gonzales 2 years ago from Manila, Philippines

      Thanks for your comments Carrie...:)

    • profile image

      JoeJack1990 2 years ago

      I have had a fantasy which I have gradually become obsessed with in my own relationship ; that of becoming cuckolded by my GF.

      I fear though that my partner will however see this as a weakness in me and it will not only devalue our relationship and destroy us.

      I am particularly interested in how women view this, evaluate it, their thought processes and whether they think any relationship can ultimately survive this ? What do women think, men also please feel free to comment.

    • purpleshadow13 profile image
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      Jennifer Gonzales 2 years ago from Manila, Philippines

      Hi Joe,

      Well I think a fantasy is just a fantasy. I'm sure you wouldn't want your GF to really do it for real right? If the foundation of your relationship with your girlfriend is deep i am sure she will understand and not take it against you. That is my opinion on this matter. However, if your fantasies gradually change you and how you treat your girlfriend as well as your relationship, then it's about time that you have to really reflect on your thoughts and actions. Try to talk it out with your girlfriend...I think she'll listen...

    • bethperry profile image

      bethperry 2 years ago from Tennesee

      Wow, very good insight here. I write fantasy Romance under a pen name, and yep, you about summed up exactly why women like what they like! And it is very refreshing to read a mature and non-biased article on the subject here at HP's. Voting up.

    • purpleshadow13 profile image
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      Jennifer Gonzales 2 years ago from Manila, Philippines

      thank you so much bethperry...:):)

    • profile image

      louie 2 years ago

      My wife and I are at a place most couples never reach. For our 1 year anniversary, she gave me the oppurtunity to watch her with another man (who is my lifetime long closest friend). When seeing how hot it made me and feeling that slippery loose feeling when my cocktail slid in her after my closest friend came inside her, she said she felt an awakening. She feels free to be with any man anytime for pleasure without guilt, and still

    • Gabriella Simone profile image

      Gabriella Simone 2 years ago from Los Angeles, California

      Great insight about male and female view of role playing. Men are very visual and the entire concept of costume, setting etc. The real key to good role play is the ability to create incredible anticipation that heightens the passion and prolongs foreplay much longer than plain sex, not matter how good it is. The real benefit for women is that it gives them plenty of foreplay time to get ready for some amazing orgasms!

    • purpleshadow13 profile image
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      Jennifer Gonzales 2 years ago from Manila, Philippines

      exactly. very well said Gabriella...:)

    • profile image

      Sgt Donka 2 years ago

      lol..... "Man fantasise's about innocent woman on his bed & making passionate love to her"...... innocent of what exactly?

      That triple murder.....

      I know i know...... innocent & fresh

      Hummm..... i fantasise about a petite woman with a huge bum hole, or an arse market where you pick a female baised on her anus.... kiss the bride X

    • profile image

      Bessylyn 2 years ago

      I need long sieze

    • limpet profile image

      Ian Stuart Robertson 2 years ago from London England

      I once had the fortune to spend a whole day under the complete control of not just one but two Dommes. They didn't charge me a penny for this experience but i summise we all had a fun time in that house while their children were at school.

    • limpet profile image

      Ian Stuart Robertson 23 months ago from London England

      I've heard of a married couple in Bristol who keep a willing male in consensual slavery to do their bidding. He performs all the housework as well as serving when guests arrive. How did they obtain their slave? They advertised in the classified column of a lifestyle magazine.

    • limpet profile image

      Ian Stuart Robertson 7 months ago from London England

      A girl confided in me when we were school kids that she 'got off' in class whenever naughty boys received a dose of the cane. Girls were exempt from corporal punishment at my school.

      As a red blooded adolescent, i drooled over the glamorous Hollywood starlets and screen sirens. It seems they don't come like they used to anymore.

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