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Shadow in the Sun

Updated on May 3, 2013

Stripped ~

I put down my pride for you. I put it down, and I walked away. How much less of me can there be than what I have become? Scary when I think of what the answer to that question may be. Scary because I am at the very center of this whole process. I let you do this to me . . .

I am shadow though I stand in the blinding sun. How can I be this hollow? I am a tiny fragment of my former self, and all that is visible is the thin outer layer. I am buried in the folds of a flower blossoming with a thousand petals. I call that flower love. I love you, I love you, I love you so much that I have buried myself inside of you.

Why is there no logic, nor indisputable argument, which can tear me away from you? Without you, nothing makes sense. I disappear into the shadow that is me. I am love living in darkness, and playing over and again in my mind is ~isn’t that where love is needed most? I comfort myself with that particular thought as if I will find all manner of justification for this torture which I have allowed to become my life. Love cannot be explained, and I don’t believe that it cares to be explained. The heart purely understands and accepts love. My head lives on a different plane. The two shall never meet. They speak different languages, neither of which translates into the other.

There is nothing more beautiful than to be folded inside of a flower called love. I am immersed in the glory that is you, and I see you in a way that no other can possibly fathom. Still, I cannot deny that loving you in darkness leaves me hollow. A love that is hidden never sees the sun. I exist on the line where the sun meets shadow ~ I am neither here, nor there. And it is no matter . . . because I cannot give you up.

© 2012 Bella Nina

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    • writer20 profile image

      Joyce Haragsim 4 years ago from Southern Nevada

      This is a sad poem with a beautiful rose keeping you company.

      Voted up and beautiful, Joyce.

    • Bella Nina profile image
      Author

      Bella Nina 4 years ago from USA

      Thank you so much Joyce. I appreciate you reading my work.

    • always exploring profile image

      Ruby Jean Fuller 4 years ago from Southern Illinois

      So very beautiful! Love's torment, perfectly described..

    • profile image

      SparrowMinistries 4 years ago

      Penetrating. Devastating. Heartbreaking. Real. Up and awesome!

    • Bella Nina profile image
      Author

      Bella Nina 4 years ago from USA

      Thank you both for your support of this hub. It is real, tormenting, heartbreaking, and beautiful. That is love. All of it. I appreciate so very much that you have read and recognized all of this.

    • Gypsy Rose Lee profile image

      Gypsy Rose Lee 4 years ago from Riga, Latvia

      Voted up and beautiful. Love can hurt much we just have to try and go on. Sad but very expressive poem.

    • Bella Nina profile image
      Author

      Bella Nina 4 years ago from USA

      Thank you so much Miss Gypsy Rose Lee. I always appreciate your comments!! Love does hurt, but, it is almost impossible to give up on love.

    • profile image

      Sueswan 4 years ago

      Hi Bella,

      "Still, I cannot deny that loving you in darkness leaves me hollow. A love that is hidden never sees the sun"

      Beautiful and heartwrenching. You deserve sunshine.

      Voted up and away

    • Bella Nina profile image
      Author

      Bella Nina 4 years ago from USA

      Thank you Sueswan. I am still searching for my sunshine. Thank you for your kind words. They are truly appreciated.

    • Rolly A Chabot profile image

      Rolly A Chabot 4 years ago from Alberta Canada

      Hi Bella Nina... words are hard to express some feelings and yet you have captured them well... thank you for sharing...

      Special Hugs from Canada

    • Bella Nina profile image
      Author

      Bella Nina 4 years ago from USA

      Thank you for caring Rolly! I appreciate your comment. Thx for the hugs too!

    • Theater girl profile image

      Jennifer 4 years ago from New Jersey

      "Loving you in darkness leaves me hollow"

      This line is so moving and resonating!

    • Bella Nina profile image
      Author

      Bella Nina 4 years ago from USA

      I am glad this piece spoke to you Theater girl. Thank you for reading.

    • Rolly A Chabot profile image

      Rolly A Chabot 3 years ago from Alberta Canada

      Hi Bella... "I disappear into the shadow that is me. I am love living in darkness, and playing over and again in my mind is ~isn’t that where love is needed most"

      Powerful words to ponder this day, voted up for certain...

      Hugs

    • Bella Nina profile image
      Author

      Bella Nina 3 years ago from USA

      Thank you for reading my work. And thank you for the vote!

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